Some Humor for Saturday

1. What do Ghosts suffer from?
Saturday fright fever.

2. Why are Saturday and Sunday strong?
Because all the other days are week days.

3. What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.

4. If you think Thursday are depressing, wait two days
Then it would be a sadder day (Saturday)

5. John Travolta tested negative for Coronavirus last night.
Turns out is was just a Saturday Night Fever.

6. Why could I not attend my friend’s dumplings party on Saturday morning?
Because I had to wok on Friday night.

Some Humor for Your Day

A Little Humor for Your Day – “Things A Witch’s Significant Other May Say”

Some Humor for Your Day

What can you do to prevent a summer cold? Catch it in winter.

In the summer, what do snowmen do? Chillout.

What word does a mermaid use to address her friends? A shell phone, of course.

What do you pay to enjoy the beach for a day? Sand dollars.

Why did the detectives show up at the concert on the beach? Something fishy was going on.

On Tarzan’s summer vacation, where did he go? Hollywood and Vine.

What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.

What kind of sandwich is best for the beach? Peanut butter and jellyfish.

Brown, hairy, and wearing sunglasses, what is it A coconut on summer vacation.

Where is your pet bird’s favorite summer vacation destination? The Canary Islands!

What makes a seagull fly above water? Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.

Some Humor for Your Day

My students aren’t afraid to ask questions

“How do you spell toad?” one of my first-grade students asked.
“We just read a story about a toad,” I said, then helped him spell it out: “T-O-A-D.”
Satisfied, he finished writing the story he’d begun, then read it aloud: “I toad my mama I wanted a dog for my birthday.”

Some Humor for Your Day

Why did the kid think it was Sunday?
Because the sun is out!

Why did the Sun cover its eyes on Sunday?
It saw the back side of the moon.

What is a vampire’s least favourite day?

Which day of the week do sunflowers adore?

Sunday and Monday are in a fight. Who wins?
Sunday. Monday is a weak day.

What do you call a barber that refuses to close on Sundays?
A Hair-etic.

Why do hot dogs and Sundays go together so well?
Because that’s not the wurst thing for a day at the ballpark.

What do you call somebody who only experiences extreme anxiety on Saturday and Sunday?
A weekend worrier.

What day is ice cream day?

Which day of the week makes you happy in the morning and sad at bedtime?

What is the nastiest word you can use on Sunday?

Why is Sunday such a fun day?
Because all you really have to do is sleep until you’re hungry, and then eat until you feel sleepy.

Why are the week days actually the strongest days of the week?
Because they all work out.

Why do I always feel great on Saturday and Sunday, and sick on all the other days?
Maybe I just have a weekend immune system.

Some Humor for Your Day

A judge tells the defendant, “You’re charged with attacking your boss with a hammer.”

“You jerk!” yells a voice in the back of the courtroom.

“You’re also charged with attacking a bartender with a hammer”, the judge continues.

“Jerrkkk!” bellows the same man.

The judge bangs his gavel. “Sir,” he says, “one more outburst and I’ll charge you with contempt.”

“I’m sorry, Your Honor”, says the man. “But I’ve been his neighbor for 10 years, and every time I ask to borrow a hammer; he said he didn’t have one.”

From February 2023 issue of Reader’s Digest.


Some Humor for Your Day

5 Very Literal Translations from March/April 2023 issue of Reader’s Digest

Papier vampier (Afrikaans)

Translation” “paper vampire”

What we call it: Stapler

Bergmal (Icelandic)

Translation: “rock language”

What we call it: Echo

Schagzeug (German)

Translation: “Hit Stuff’

What we call it: drums

Gavisti (Sanskrit)

Translation: “desire for cattle”

What we call it: War

Nui zai ku (Mandarin)

Translation: “cowboy pants”

What we call it: Jeans

Some Humor for Your Day

“Shucks, I think my spell checker needs an update!”

Some Humor for Your Day

Some Witchy Humor for Your Day

Why do witches stay in 5 star hotels?

Because of the excellent broom service!


What do witches put on their bagels?

Scream cheese!


Why did the witch give up fortune telling?

She didn’t see any future in it?


How does a witch tell the time?

She looks at her witch watch!


What do you call two witches who live together?



What happened to the witch with an upside down nose?

Every time she sneezed, she blew her hat off!


Whats the problem with twin witches?

You never know witch is which!


What game do witches play on halloween?

Hide and ghost seek!


What’s a witch’s favourite ride at the fun fair?

The scary-go-round!


What would you find on a haunted beach?

A sand-witch!


Why do cats prefer wizards to witches?

Because sorcerers sometimes have milk in them!


What’s a witch’s favourite make-up?



What do you learn at witch school?



Why did three witches call in the plumber?

Hubble, bubble, toilet trouble!


What do you call a witch with chickenpox?

An itchy witchy!


What do the fastest witches use to get around?



What do witches use to style their hair?

Scare spray!


How do you make a witch itch?

Take away the ‘w’!


Why did the witch go to the doctor?

She had a dizzy spell!


What happenes to witches who break the school rules?

They get ex-spelled!


What noise did the witch’s cereal make?

Snap, cackle and pop!


What happened to the bad-tempered witch?

She flew off the handle!


Laugh-Of-The-Day: You Know Someone is New To Paganism or Magick when… c. 2012

You Know Someone Is New To Paganism or Magick When……


An ATHAME is the gas you use for your grill.

A CENSOR is a drink you mix with alcohol.

ASTRAL PROJECTION is a home-made movie viewer.

A SYMPATHITIC LINK is when you feel sorry because your chain broke.

WICCA is that part of the candle that burns.

APHRODITE is a prehistoric bird.

ARCHETYPES is a kind of building structure.

BLESSED BE is the god of insects.

A BOOK OF SHADOWS contains silhouettes of friends or family members.

A BRAZIER is support wear for women.

CASTING is done with a fishing line, or on a set in Hollywood.

CHARGING is done with a credit card or battery.

The only way to get into a CIRCLE is to have the right of way.

Crystal CLEANSING is done with window cleaner.

CYCLES have to do with your washing machine and when to add fabric softener.

DEMETER is where you put your quarter when you park downtown.

A DOLMAN is a new brand of banana.

HANDFASTING is eating without utensils.

LEY LINES happen at the airport in Hawaii.

PAN is something you fry food in.

A QUARTER is 25 cents and still buys a cup of coffee. (Note: This person is not only new to magick, but they also haven’t been out in a while!)

SKYCLAD is a shade of blue clothing.

A TRAD is a type of geometrical figure.

WHEEL OF FORTUNE is the game show with Vanna White.

A Little Humor for Your Day

Wouldn’t it be great if we could plant our favorite flower to grow over a hammock or lawn chair in our favorite spot to sit outside?

“Laugh and the Whole World Laughs With You,” Now Cackling…

A Little Humor for Your Day

What is hump day like for the working parents?
      Wednesday that never leaves them alone with never-ending work.

Why did the employee get a camel in the office building?
     Because the boss said, ‘Bring in the hump day’.

What did the student say when they had too much homework on Wednesday?
     This is the Monday-est Wednesday ever!

Why are Sundays stronger than Wednesdays?
     Because Wednesday is a week day.

Why did the woman cry on a Wednesday evening?
     Because she thought it was whine Wednesday.

What do camels sing on karaoke night?
     My hump, my hump, my hump (ha), my lovely lady lumps

Why did the man call it a weekend on a Wednesday?
     Because he said, “After two days it will be Friday, which makes tomorrow a pre-Friday, hence, it is a weekend on Wednesday”.

Why don’t they have Drivers Ed on Wednesday in the Middle East?
     It wears out the camel.

A Chuckle for Your Day

A Little Humor for Your Day

In honor of my grandson who is studying to be a surgeon. He has not decided what type of surgeon just yet but is leaning towards cardio-thoracic

Divination Journal

Tarot Cards

Today’s Tarot card reading comes from The Celtic Dragon Tarot by D. J. Conway. With art done by Lisa Hunt. This deck is unique as the cards are never read in reverse. Copyright 2001


Six of Cups – Minor Arcana

Reunions; unexpect gifts.

A little boy and girl are smiling and hugging two large Water dragons, who rise out of a pond. The children symbolize the natural psychic connection all humans possess before they are taught such a thing is false. They are freely communicating with astral creatures because it is a normal thing to do. On the flower and tree-covered banks stand six chalice. The flowers and trees represent constant renewal of life, fed by the waters of the lake (emotional purity and balance). Tiny dragons flutter happily around the children, symbols of the potential power of even the tiniest pieces of cosmic energy. The six chalice represent the power of building in all its connotations; building of relationships, healing power, and bridges between people and/or species. By acknowledging this power of building, we we acknowledge the interconnectedness of all things, animate and inanimate.

Divinatory Meaning: A reunion with old friends may be near. New opportunities present themselves; be ready to act on them. Unexpected gifts may surprise you.


The Lovers – Major Arcana

Am emotional decision.

A Forest dragon stands on the bank of a lake, its neck outstretched to touch noses with a beautiful Water dragon that rises from the waters. The gaze at each other in love, unconcerned that their attraction  will prove difficult because of their very different lifestyles. For the moment, they are caught up in the power of their emotions. The Forest dragon represents the liner, analytical left brain and the conscious mind, while the Water dragon represents creativity, spiritually connected right mind and the conscious mind. To achieve success and reach goals, both halves of the brain, as well as the conscious and subconscious minds, must live and work together in harmony in order to reach a spiritual balance point. However, because of the vast differences in perceiving life and spirit, this is extremely difficult to maintain on a constant basis.  Thus, we go through life in a kind of dance, approaching, then retreating from the balance point. The heron, representing generation of life, and the butterfly, symbolizing the soul itself, reveal that we must always be aware of the soul and its need to grow, regardless of our emotional side-paths.

Divinatory Meaning

A romantic encounter may come into your life. You may be faced with an attraction or a temptation that may not be good for you. There will be an attraction of opposites that will be difficult to reconcile in the long run. A difficult choice will arise; make your decision on facts, not the emotions




Comfortable Aloneness

A dragon and a man sit along the edge of a forest. It is a sunny day, and many small animals and birds are around the dragon and the man. The man is at one with Nature and his astral teacher, the dragon. The birds are messages from spirit to help him make a decision and find his path in life. The wolves in the background represent the strength, cunning, and wisdom he is learning, while the squirrel of resourcefulness, the rabbit of fertility, and the little mice of self-preservation help him to create a balanced attitude towards life.

DIVINATORY MEANING: You feel comfortable, safe, and at ease with yourself. There will soon be a pleasant period of being alone. A journey


See the source imageKing of Wands – Minor Arcana Court Card

Ambition; leadership.

A regal looking older man sits on a richly craved throne; he wears a crown with small blue stones on the spiky tips. Because the man’s long and dedicated studies, he has earned the title of Master of Air. Chaotic thoughts no longer plague hi,, for he has became disciplined in weeding out, organizing, and bending the power of those thoughts to his concentrated desire and goals. About his shoulders is a white and multiblue mantle (comfort and contentment), with tiny dragon figures as part of the design. On one partially raised hand sits a tiny, dark blue dragon, a small messenger that helps the king to communicate with other realms. The king’s other hand holds a long staff-like wand (willpower) with a crystal tip; its glow shows the purity of his will. A huge dragon peers over the back of the  above the man’s head. This is the kings guardian and advisor, a long-time companion on journeys through other realms of being. Another of his small Guardian dragons lies curled contently at his feet, its sleep revealing the calmness of the atmosphere around this powerful man.

Divinatory Meaning:

A masculine influence, who is powerful in the business world, could guide you in an important decision. Ambition and leadership qualities will get you ahead in your career. Beware that haste and ego do not get you in trouble




Inguz – “Ing-guz” – Literally: “Seed” or “The god, Ing” – Esoteric: Process, space

Rune of isolation or separation in order to create a space or place where the process of transformation into higher states of being can occur. Rune of gestation and internal growth.

Psi: internal growth, personal development, the power of suggestion, the inner-child, wholeness

Energy: earth-god, stored energy, gestation process, male mysteries, subtlety, planned burstsv

Mundane: male sexuality, agriculture

Divinations: Resting, gestation, internal growth, expectation, time for oneself; or impotence, scattering, movement without change, frivolity, immaturity.


  • Storage and transformation of power for ritual use.
  • Stored Energy
  • Passive meditation and centering of energy and thought
  • Sudden release of energy
  • All forms of subtle, creative action

Witches Rune

The Ear Of Corn

Keywords: Good luck, success.
Meanings: This rune represents abundance, success and happiness. This is considered a lucky rune and if leading, it is very positive about your query, whether the query is about finance, business, friendship, partnership or spirituality. In conjunction with the Rings, it indicates a happy and prosperous marriage. With the Sun, it means success in your career, and with Waves, success abroad

I Ching


Hexagram Thirty – Six/36

Name: Ming I.

Keyphrase: The darkening of the light.

Formed By The Trigrams: Earth over Fire.


General: Concealing your light when danger is around is an effective way of avoiding detection.

Love: Detach yourself from the issue and do not reveal your true feelings.

Business: This is not a good time to start any new ventures.

Personal: Use this time to work on your inner strengths until the current obstructions pass.


Overview: Ming I is very much about caution and the need to keep a low profile. It is harder to travel by night than it is by day. But is also easier to give yourself away if you show your light. Don’t try and make any further progress right now. Now is not the time to issue a challenge or to take anybody on. Keep a low profile and bide your time while strengthening you resources.



Thirty – Six

It is very individualistic, a scholar, a voracious reader, has an excellent imagination, and is often disorganized.

Angel Number

Animal Spirit Guide or Helper

A Little Humor for Your Day

What do Ghosts suffer from? Saturday fright fever.

What do cows do on Saturday nights? They go to the mooooovies.

What did Friday say to Thursday? Come over on Saturday and stay for a Sundae.

What do ghosts like to do on a Saturday night? Boogie.

Which day of the week does one need the most? A day between Saturday and Sunday.

When did the King have his jousting contests? On Saturday Knight.

How do you keep the dreams alive on Saturdays? By hitting the snooze button.

What does a taxidermist do on Saturdays? Nothing special, just the usual stuff.

Why are fish lonely on the weekends? Because there’s no school on Saturdays or Sundays.

Why is Saturday actually a depressing day of the week? Because it’s a sadder day.