A man and a dog were going down the street. The man rode, yet walked. What was the dog’s name? Yet.
A man had two sons and named them both Ed. How come? Two Eds (heads) are better than one.
At what time do most people go to the dentist? At tooth-hurty (2:30).
Can you spell a composition with two letters? SA (essay).
Can you spell a pretty girl with two letters? QT (cutey).
Can you spell soft and slow with two letters? EZ.
Can you spell very happy with three letters? XTC (ecstasy).
Do moths cry? Sure. Haven’t you ever seen a mothball (bawl) ?
How can you prove that a horse has six legs? A horse has four legs (forelegs) in front and two behind.
How can you spell chilly with two letters? IC (icy) .
Young At Heart Spell
To stay young at heart no matter your age.
Symbols of youth or enthusiasm (this can be a symbol for any activity that interests you, like a Frisbee or a yo- yo.
Age is not just something that happens to the body; it is also a state of mind. This spell is designed to help you stay young no matter how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.
Light the candle and envision yourself as you were as a child. See yourself now, doing all the activities you enjoy. Then see yourself in the future, but see the child that still exists within you peeking through. Say the spell with enthusiasm!
Young in spirit
Young in heart
Young in practice
From the start
Keep me fresh
And keep me bright
I go not gentle
Into the night.
Young at work
Young at play
Young I feel
And young I’ll stay.
So Mote It Be.
Money Tree Spell
We all know money doesn’t grow on trees, unfortunately. But this spell will help increase your cash flow.
Items You Will Need:
Gold and/or silver ribbons
Small charms, earrings, beads or crystals
Bells or wind chimes
Best Time To Cast:
During the Waxing Moon, in the Spring or Summer in the Fall or Winter, do this spell when the Waxing Moon is in Taurus
Tie the ribbons loosely on the branches of a favorite tree that’s special to you. Hang the other adornments on the branches as well. These objects represent gifts or offerings to the Nature Spirits, in return for their assistance in bringing your wealth. As you attach each item, state your intention aloud and ask the Nature Spirits to help you acquire what you desire. When you’ve finished, thank the tree and the Nature Spirits.
SPELL FOR LUCK
wondering magic bring to me, in this life the luck I need,
so all my angles can be seen, and thus fulfill my every dream,
combined earth and fire, bring forth my hearts desire,
guardians of the sea, keep all harm from me.
This should be done while lighting 4 candles 1 at each side of u repeat the
above words 3 times to bring good luck and obtain your hearts desire.
By casting this spell, you bind your beloved to you and vice versa, so be certain that is what you really want before proceeding.
Items You Will Need:
- A needle
- Your lover’s underpants
Best Time To Cast:
- On a Saturday when the sun or moon is in Taurus
Collect the ingredients listed above – ideally, you’ll need all your lover’s undies. This spell could take some time so you might opt to perform it in stages. Cast a circle. Thread your needle and sew a stitch into the waistband of the first pair of underpants (try to do this so it doesn’t show). Tie a knot and say or think this affirmation: “(Name)” is faithful to me only, and we are very happy together.” Make another stitch, tie a knot, and repeat the affirmation.
Continue in this manner until you’ve sewn a complete circle around the waistband of his or her underpants, with lots of little knots tied along the way. The string of knots sometimes called a “witch’s ladder” holds your intention firmly in place and ties the two of you together in an exclusive partnership. When you’ve finished sewing as many garments as you feel up to working on, say aloud: “This spell is done in harmony with Divine Will, our own true wills and for the good of all, harming none.” This disclaimer invites a higher power to take it from here and neutralizes the manipulative aspect of the spell. If, the relationship isn’t in your best interests, you’re giving Divine Will license to act in your behalf to release you from the spell.
Open the circle. Repeat the spell as many times as necessary until you’ve stitched your intention into ever pair of our lover’s underpants.
SPELL TO RID ONESELF OF A BOTHERSOME SPIRIT
Say “What is dark be filled with light, remove this spirit from my sight.”
Before starting place your hand before you, and start the flow of power out of your hand
and then say the words, letting the envisioned blue-white light from your power hand
fill the room or house or any other place that you might be.
This is best used at the end of a spoken or written spell.
This adds a certain boost to the releasing of energy.
It also works best if you are wearing a Pentagram you have attuned to yourself.
Speak these word with all the fibers of your body while releasing the spell’s energy:
By the Pentagram I wear,
Water, Fire, Earth, and Air,
Ruled by Spirit as All should be
As I speak
So Mote It Be!
Break Another Witches Spell
This spell will help to undo a hex or spell that has been put on you by another witch.
You Will Need
A Length Of Silver Cord Or String
Your Boline (Magickal Knife Used For Cutting) Or A Pair Of Scissors
Tie one knot in each end of the silver cord, as you do this visualize one knot representing you and the other person who has cast the spell or hex.
Cut the cord in the centre, chant the following, and see the spell breaking:
“From you to me this spell I break, This was not right for you to make. It’s path I will abruptly end, And back to you the spell I send”
Buy or make a charm that resembles a lions head.
Pass it three times through the flame of a yellow candle, meditating on your esteem and the
respect you deserve. Infuse then the charm with your energy by anointing with essential oil of
rose, orange or hazel. Wear it on a chain, band, or in your pocket. Whenever you touch it,
feel the confidence building within you.
The Vexation Box Spell
This spell is for dealing with someone who is more of an annoyance than a threat, someone who really gets on your nerves or stresses you out by intruding in your life or violating your space. It is for someone you have already asked to stop but who persists in bothering you. It is not a spell to use on someone whose actions you object to within their own life or space. You need:
herbs for protection
two heads of garlic (or more, if you are using a big box or dealing with a group of people)
a photograph of the person, or their name written on a piece of paper
Put everything in the box. Cover the box and give it a good hard shake, mentally yelling at the person to modify the behavior that annoys you. Put the box away, in a drawer or up on a shelf. Take it out and give it a hard shake, yelling at them, every time they annoy you. After the first week or so you should seldom need to shake the box. Throw the box away in a few months, when the garlic begins to spoil.