Category: All Regular Daily Posts

A Little Humor For The Day – Redneck Pagan Giggles

Redneck Pagan Giggles

1.  Does your Ceremonial Garb consist of cutoffs and a tube top?

2  Do you think “Family Tradition” is a dating club?

3.  Have you reached 3rd degree, but not 3rd grade?

4.  Is your coven’s secret names for the God and Goddess “Cooter” and
“SweetCheeks”?

5.  Does your ceremonial Chalice say “Budweiser” on it?  (2 pts if it says
“Pabst”)

6. Do you consider chewing tobacco a sacred herb?

7.  Does your circle dance include the words “dosey-do”?

8.  Is your altar pentacle a photo of John Wayne’s star on the Hollywood Walk
of Fame?

9.  Did your coven choose its High Priest at a belching contest?

10.  Did your coven choose its High Priestess at a wet t-shirt contest?

11.  Does your anointing oil smell like “Old Spice”?

12.  Have you ever refilled your chalice from a keg?

13. Does your outdoor circle have defunct washing machines for quarter altars?

14. Do you do your cakes and ale with a can of Pabst and Little Debbies?

15. Does your Pantheon include Yukon Jack, Jim Beam and St. Pauli Girl?

16. Does your ritual music include Johnny Cash singing “Ring of Fire”?

17. Do you think the Wiccan Rede is good for making twig furniture?

18.  Do you believe that the Pentagram is a Western Union message to 5 people?

19.  Does your altar cloth say “Holiday Inn” or “Howard Johnson’s”?

20. Does your Goddess picture say “Miss September” at the bottom?

21. Does your God statue look a little too much like Elvis Presley?

22.  Have you ever written a spell on the back of a Denny’s menu?

23.  Have you ever canceled a coven meeting to watch Pay-per-View wrestling on
TV?

24.  Have you ever called the National Enquirer because you raised a potato that
looked like the Willendorf Goddess?

25.  Have you EVER cast a love spell on livestock?

6 Quick Energy Tips for Busy People

6 Quick Energy Tips for Busy People

When energy levels dip, try these simple tips to recharge your  batteries. They’re quick, easy and will help you breeze through the most hectic  day!
  1. Dry-brush your body before you step into the shower. This  invigorates skin and sloughs off dead cells. Use a citrus-infused body wash. You  will hum your way through the morning.
  2. Raise a (whole wheat) toast to breakfast! It gives you  fiber, which regulates digestion and keeps energy levels up. Also, try to  combine proteins and carbs for breakfast. Oatmeal, egg and fruit will get your  engine chugging merrily.
  3. Keep rosemary essential oil handy. It’s one of the most  energizing oils. If you sprinkle a few drops of it on a clean handkerchief and  take a few deep breaths, you’ll feel instantly recharged.
  4. Sip green or white tea instead of coffee. They are low in  caffeine, detoxify the body and leave you feeling genuinely refreshed.
  5. Craving carbs? Go ahead and enjoy them, but make sure you  balance them with something that’s good for you. So, have your pasta, but do  order a garden salad alongside.
  6. Try this simple exercise while sitting at your desk: Put  your forearms on the table and rest your forehead on your hands. Breathe out  fully. Breathe in again, easily, gently lifting up your head. Now exhale,  tucking your chin and easing yourself back to arms on forehead. Repeat till you  start feeling revitalized.

 

Daily Feng Shui Tip for January 13th – ‘Rubber Duckie’s Birthday’

Today is ‘Rubber Duckie’s Birthday,’ and if you want someone to think that you’re ‘the one’ and to make your own bath time much more fun, then you could use a duckie or two. Feng Shui says that a pair of mandarin ducks placed with loving intent into the ‘Romance/Relationship’ area of main floor or bedroom (or both) will quickly bring a perfect partner to you. And who doesn’t want a perfect partner to help feather their nest? If it walks like a perfect partner and talks like a perfect partner, well then it is the perfect partner! Thanks for the love, mandarin duckies — we’re awfully fond of you.

By Ellen Whitehurst for Astrology.com