Tag: Self-Help

Today’s I Ching Hexagram for Aug. 4 is54: Careful Affection

54: Careful Affection

Hexagram 54

General Meaning: Affection is the basis of all lasting relationships, but must be channeled properly in order to bring satisfaction, and support the self-esteem of both parties. For example, a married person’s lover would necessarily have conflicted feelings: affection coupled with insecurity. Relationships based mainly on personal attraction, especially those that are outside the mainstream, require special caution and tactful reserve.

If you assert yourself too much, or try to make yourself indispensable, you will only incur misfortune. It is never easier to make disastrous mistakes than when you venture outside the bounds of propriety. If you are in doubt as to whether you should follow your heart or your head, allow for some time to pass, and perhaps the answer will become clear. Initiating any action could bring misfortune. Do not attempt to be too creative or attract favorable attention at this time.

Daily Motivator for July 26th – Positive power

Positive power

Your most formidable obstacle is you. If you are unwilling, or filled with  doubt, you simply cannot get very far.

All the other challenges and limitations, you can find a way around. Yet when  you persist in holding yourself back, nothing can move you forward.

The extremely good news is, you never have to continue holding yourself back.  You can be entirely free of your most stubborn burden simply by choosing to be.

Your doubts are yours by choice, and you can choose to let them go. Your  apathy, lack of ambition, and negativity are yours by choice, and you can be  free of them all in an instant.

There are many difficult challenges to living a life of success and  fulfillment. Yet once you get the positive power of your own authentic purpose  on your side, you have what it takes to handle everything else.

Instead of being your own biggest obstacle, choose to be your own most  effective advocate and facilitator of success. You have the power to choose in  every moment, so choose again and again to live the richest, most meaningful  life you can imagine.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator

Today’s I Ching Hexagram for July 17 is 3: Difficulty at the Beginning

3: Difficulty at the Beginning

Hexagram 3

General Meaning: Difficulty at the beginning. The birth of anything new – including any new venture or relationship — is an entry into the realm of the unknown. Strange new feelings can seem to be rushing upon you, and confusion can easily take over. But even chaos is full of potential if you harness it properly. Don’t rush things. Do not let events overwhelm you. Stay calm and persevering, but do take the first step. And get whatever help you can.

Challenges lie ahead. Now is a time to gather your strength and find courage. Like a newborn fawn, the opportunity for rapid development is real, but only by being determined can the fawn rise to its feet and survive to grow to full stature. Keep going despite difficulties and you will manifest the success you desire. One primary challenge is maintaining personal clarity. Avoid lunging at seemingly perfect solutions; wait until a good practical course of action becomes clear. Do not start a new venture before thinking it through. A careless step in the beginning can easily cause events to spin out of control later. Enlist the aid of experienced people.

Daily Motivator for July 15 – Imagine yourself

Imagine yourself

Imagine yourself full of energy and enthusiasm, getting up each morning  excited and positive about the day ahead. Imagine yourself being highly  effective, able to achieve whatever you set out to do with confidence and  ease.

In your mind’s eye, see yourself working with discipline and focus, able to  quickly and easily make the right decisions, always knowing what to say and do  in every situation.

Imagine yourself being the person you’ve always wanted to be. Imagine living  the life you’ve always dreamed of living. See it in detail. Visualize it with  richness and intensity. Know you can have it. Know you can do it. Know you can  be it, with absolute certainty.

Imagine yourself being the best you can possibly be. Make your image of  yourself a positive one, and you’ll program yourself for success. Imagine  yourself at your very best. Hold that image firmly in your mind, day after day,  moment by moment, and you’ll absolutely find a way, and live the life, that will  make it real.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator 

Daily OM for July 12 – The Friend We Want to Be

The Friend We Want to Be

Evaluating Our Relationships

by Madisyn Taylor

Be the friend to others that you wish them to be to you.

 

There comes a time in all our lives when we may need to evaluate our relationships, making sure that they are having a positive effect on us, rather than dragging us down. Without realizing it, we may be spending precious time and energy engaging in friendships that let us down, rather than cultivating ones that support and nourish us along our path. Life, with its many twists, turns, and challenges, is difficult enough without us entertaining people in our inner circle who drain our energy. We can do so much more in this world when we are surrounded by people who understand what we’re trying to do and who positively support our efforts to walk our path.

We can begin this evaluation process by simply noticing how we feel in the context of each one of our close relationships. We may begin to see that an old friend is still carrying negative attitudes or ideas that we ourselves need to let go of in order to move forward. Or we may find that we have a long-term relationship with someone who has a habit of letting us down, or not showing up for us when we need support. There are many ways to go about changing the status quo in situations like this, having a heart to heart with our friend showing through example. This process isn’t so much about abandoning old friends as it is about shifting our relationships so that they support us on our journey rather than holding us back.

An important part of this process is looking at ourselves and noticing what kind of friend we are to the people in our lives. We might find that as we adjust our own approach to a relationship, challenging ourselves to be more supportive and positive, our friends make adjustments as well and the whole world benefits.

Help for Making New Habits Deepak Chopra

Help for Making New Habits

by Deepak Chopra

Every habit is a cooperative venture between body and mind. Generally  speaking, the mind leads the venture and body follows as a silent partner. It is  attention, or awareness, that touches the sleeping powers of the mind and makes  them vital again. The smallest shift of attention can change the world you  perceive and the body you live with.

Guidelines for new habits:

1. The habit should be  acquired effortlessly over a period of time.

2. It should be guided by  positive thoughts.

3. It should be consciously repeated, but always in a  good frame of mind, never forced in as the enemy of a bad habit.

Cultivated in this way, new habits condition the whole mind-body system to  create health and happiness automatically.

I am again reminded of those two sentences from Abraham Maslow about very  healthy, creative people: “What such a person wants and enjoys is apt to be just  what is good for him. His spontaneous reactions are as capable, efficient and  right as if they had been thought out in advance.” It sounds too good to be  true, but is just habit at work.

All that is needed is the awareness that the unconscious mind can be changed  in its routine, and then one simply changes it. People who have been unhappy all  their lives can become happy simply by realizing that the source of change is  inside themselves.

The unconscious can be refined and rechanneled through suggestions,  repetition, and above all, attention. Do not fret too much over “how it all  happens”—that is just an old mindset saying, “It won’t happen, it can’t.”

 

The Daily Motivator for June 19th – Enjoy more

The more you enjoy, the more you accomplish. Truly enjoy every moment, and  you create a positive momentum that is unstoppable.

It is not success that brings happiness. It is happiness that brings success.

Enjoy life, however it may be, and you open yourself to the very best  possibilities. The more sincerely thankful you are for what you have, the more  value there is in it.

Let yourself enjoy yourself, your life, your world and all the people in it.  Enjoy, and the awesome power of gratitude comes easily and naturally.

Reality is what it is, and yet you can always choose how to respond to it.  Respond more and more with enthusiastic enjoyment, and watch that reality  steadily improve.

Life is yours and it is beautiful on this day, in this place. Enjoy, and make  it even better.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator 

Daily Motivator for June 1 – Encourage yourself

Encourage yourself

Many times, the situations and events in your life won’t offer you much encouragement. On top of that, even other people may not have much encouragement to give you.

But that doesn’t mean you have to go without any encouragement. After all, you are perfectly capable of encouraging yourself.

Remind yourself how truly fortunate you are to be able to experience life’s great wonders. Consider all the positive possibilities that are available to you, even on the most difficult days.

You are marvelously free to think what you wish, to feel the way you choose, and to act in the best interest of yourself and your world. On top of that, you’re surrounded by a magnificent abundance that you can transform into great meaningful value.

Perhaps at the moment life is not offering you much encouragement, but that’s not really a problem. Connect with the joys you’ve already experienced, the possibilities of the present, and your dreams for the future, and you’ll find plenty of encouragement within yourself.

Is your world in need of encouragement, and there’s none to be found? Be the encourager, and you’ll be powerfully encouraged.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator

Daily OM for June 1 – Recognizing Happiness

Recognizing Happiness
Analyzing the Path

by Madisyn Taylor

 

When we take the time to recognize when we are happy and what that feels like, it becomes easier to recreate. 

Those of us on the path of personal and spiritual growth have a tendency to analyze our unhappiness in order to find the causes and make improvements. But it is just as important, if not more so, to analyze our happiness. Since we have the ability to rise above and observe our emotions, we can recognize when we are feeling joyful and content. Then we can harness the power of the moment by savoring our feelings and taking time to be grateful for them.

Recognition is the first step in creating change, therefore recognizing what it feels like to be happy is the first step toward sustaining happiness in our lives. We can examine how joy feels in our bodies and what thoughts run through our minds in times of bliss. Without diminishing its power, we can retrace our steps to discover what may have put us in this frame of mind, and then we can take note of the choices we’ve made while there. We might realize that we are generally more giving and forgiving when there’s a smile on our face, or that we are more likely to laugh off small annoyances and the actions of others when they don’t resonate with our light mood.

Once we know what it feels like and can identify some of the triggers and are aware of our actions, we can recreate that happiness when we are feeling low. Knowing that like attracts like, we can pull ourselves out of a blue mood by focusing on joy. We might find that forcing ourselves to be giving and forgiving, even when it doesn’t seem to come naturally, helps us to reconnect with the joy that usually precedes it. If we can identify a song, a picture, or a pet as a happiness trigger, we can use them as tools to recapture joy if we are having trouble finding it. By focusing our energy on analyzing happiness and all that it encompasses, we feed, nurture, and attract more of it into our lives, eventually making a habit of happiness.

Today’s I Ching Hexagram for June 1 is 54: Careful Affection

54: Careful Affection

Hexagram 54

General Meaning: Affection is the basis of all lasting relationships, but must be channeled properly in order to bring satisfaction, and support the self-esteem of both parties. For example, a married person’s lover would necessarily have conflicted feelings: affection coupled with insecurity. Relationships based mainly on personal attraction, especially those that are outside the mainstream, require special caution and tactful reserve.

If you assert yourself too much, or try to make yourself indispensable, you will only incur misfortune. It is never easier to make disastrous mistakes than when you venture outside the bounds of propriety. If you are in doubt as to whether you should follow your heart or your head, allow for some time to pass, and perhaps the answer will become clear. Initiating any action could bring misfortune. Do not attempt to be too creative or attract favorable attention at this time.

Daily OM for May 24th – Centering and Expressing

Centering and Expressing
Communication

by Madisyn Taylor

 

Expressing ourselves honestly in any relationship is essential to our well-being.

When we are in a relationship where we feel listened to and understood, we count ourselves lucky because we know how rare that experience is. We reserve our most intimate selves for the people who, along with us, cocreate an open space where we feel free to express ourselves and listen without judgment. These relationships, which thrive on open communication, can mean the difference between existential loneliness and a deep sense of belonging. We all long to feel heard, understood, and loved, and clear communication makes this possible.

Sometimes problems arise in the process of expressing how we feel, but it is always worth it to do the work. Even in our less intimate relationships, expressing ourselves honestly is essential to our sense of well-being. Whether at home with family or in the outside world, successful communication requires some forethought; otherwise we risk blundering through our relationships like the proverbial bull in a china shop. However, too much forethought can stifle us or cause us to pad our words so extremely that we end up saying nothing at all or confusing the matter further. The good news is that there are many methods that can come to our rescue, from meditation to visualization to journaling.

If the person we need to communicate with is open to sitting in meditation together for a set period of time before speaking, this can be invaluable. When we are calm and centered, we can count on ourselves to speak and respond truthfully. We can also meditate on our own time and then practice what we need to say. A visualization in which we sit with the person and lovingly exchange a few words can also be a great precedent to an actual conversation. If writing comes easily, we can write out what we need to say; it may take several drafts, but we will eventually find the words. The key is to find ways to center ourselves so that we communicate meaningfully, lovingly, and wisely. In this way, we honor our companions and create relationships in which there is a genuine sense of understanding and respect.

Daily Motivator for May 23rd – What you give

What you give

It is by making a difference that you make a life. It is by giving of your authentic self that you gain access to life’s great richness.

When things are going well, you have many opportunities to make a difference. When difficult problems arise, you have even more opportunities to move the world positively forward.

Today will present you with plenty of meaningful opportunities to make a positive difference. Each of these opportunities is also an opportunity to greatly enrich your life.

If it is self-esteem you seek, here is a way to guarantee it. Observe yourself as you work through the challenges and act to create real value in your world.

All of life longs to hear your unique voice. Be yourself, and do it with passion, effectiveness, creativity and love.

Make the choices that will make a real difference. What you give is what determines how well you truly live.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator

Your Daily Chinese Zodiac Horoscopes for May 16th

Rabbit

If you and your significant other have needed to talk, this is the day you can make some major breakthroughs. All of a sudden the clam breaks open and no-one seems able to shut either of you up! Stop long enough to listen to each other, it will count.

Dragon

Your workplace is about to change due to changing needs in your family or at home. You will have an opportunity to improve your personal and financial security in the long run, though it may mean some risks, short-term changes, or sacrifices right now.

Snake

No matter what ails you, a little bit of brisk fresh air and exercise will help clear your head. Avoid high-impact and extreme sports, though. This will be one of those days if you have a parent who is urging you to add a new branch to the family tree.

Horse

Trust your intuition. You will have a insight into a relative’s behavior and attitudes, and that will help you connect with them in a more healthy and positive way going forward. Listen carefully, because you will learn something important.

Sheep

You may have interesting and unusual telephone calls and emails today. Someone could send you a hot invitation to a big party where there could be romantic opportunities, especially if you are single. If you are married, bring your significant other along, they need a break!

Monkey

Get ready for financial breakthroughs. If you have been looking for work, sharpen your pencil, dust off that resume, put on your best duds and hit the pavement. Today could be your lucky day. If you are employed look for a bonus, promotion or raise in the near future.

Rooster

Today is all about you, and you will be alternatively patting yourself on the back, then beating yourself up. Both extremes are not good for your self-esteem. Just remember that you are a human being, regardless of whether you are winning or losing the game from one moment to the next.

Dog

Your personal growth has reached a flat spot and you feel you need to find a leader or teacher. But are you sure that is really what you need? Maybe what you really need is to accept where you are at, and believe in who you are and what you know.

Pig

A friend or companion has decided that your unsolicited advice or feedback has merit after all, and they will be expressing their appreciation together with some sheepish apologies most likely. Do your best to be gracious and understanding, it’s not easy to admit you’re wrong.

Rat

Three solid days of positive energy have you full to nearly bursting with good will for your fellow man. You may find yourself invited to a number of social occasions, parties, or gatherings that feature large numbers of people and great opportunity for making new friends.

Ox

You may have an unusual opportunity to travel with or study with your significant other. Today is all about shared interests. If you want to stir your partner’s passions, bring home a good book or some tickets to that special seminar they wanted to attend.

Tiger

You will be thinking about redecorating, or tearing down part of your home to make way for some big changes today. You need to think big, but your loved ones could be threatened by any changes that you make, especially if you don’t include them in the planning stages.

Daily Motivator for April 29th – Momentum of achievement

Momentum of achievement

Success comes most readily to those who are already successful. That’s why the small successes are so important.

When you set a goal, however small it may be, and then work to achieve it, you put in motion a powerful positive momentum. That momentum can help you to reach toward higher and higher levels of achievement.

The small successes do matter, for they set that momentum in motion. No step is trivial, however small it may be, when it is leading in a positive direction.

Too many people wait and hope for, beg, plead and even fight for that one big break that will bring about instant success. Sadly, in so doing they overlook the small opportunities for success that come in every moment of every day.

You can easily make a little bit of progress in the next fifteen minutes. And you can make a little more progress in the next few hours. Create for yourself the momentum of achievement. And you can take it wherever you wish to go.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator

Daily Motivator for April 17th – When you are willing

When you are willing

Even when you start with nothing, if you are willing there is a way to reach the goal. Even if you have lost everything, you still have the ability to make a difference, and to create new value.

There is nothing to be gained by filling yourself with despair about what is or what has been. Empower yourself by letting go of the need to pity yourself.

No matter where you have come from or where you are, right now you can take a positive, productive step forward. Right now you can choose to create value instead of excuses.

The best opportunities require effort and commitment and persistence. And the great thing is, you’re absolutely capable of making the commitment, of putting forth the effort, and of persisting for as long as necessary.

You are indeed capable of transforming even the most difficult situation into bright, shining, meaningful richness and joy. The thing you must decide in every moment is, are you willing?

Be willing, and live up to your beautiful, unique potential. Be willing to join forces with your best possibilities and to show life how great it can be.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator

Daily Motivator for April 6th – Push yourself forward

Push yourself forward

There are plenty of obstacles that can stand in your way. Don’t be one of them.

Your own thoughts, assumptions and fears can hold you back just as surely as a solid brick wall. And yet, just as you created those self-imposed obstacles, you can let them go.

Instead of fighting against yourself, use the amazing power of your thoughts to more fully enable yourself. Instead of constructing elaborate excuses for avoiding your dreams, just go ahead and let yourself live those dreams.

Yes, life is difficult and challenging, and requires great effort and commitment on your part. Instead of adding to the difficulty with your own negativity, you can choose to enthusiastically transform that difficulty into profound fulfillment.

Remind yourself what a privilege it is to be alive, and to be able to make a difference. Then, focus your awareness on the positive possibilities and do what you do best.

Use your thoughts not to hold yourself back, but to push yourself positively and lovingly forward. Aim the power of your thoughts in a positive, fulfilling direction and your whole life will go in that direction too.

— Ralph Marston

The Daily Motivator

Daily OM for March 20th – Taking a Break from What You Are Doing

Taking a Break from What You Are Doing
A New Approach

 

 

Sometimes finding the answer is as easy as taking a break and stepping back from the situation. 

Sometimes we can get so wrapped up in our thoughts that we wind up going round in round in circles, finding it difficult to concentrate on things and, because we are so distracted, not really accomplishing much. There may be signals—mental, emotional, and physical—that tell us we need to slow down and relax. Since we are so involved in things that are external to us, however, we may easily overlook what is really going on inside of us. It is during these times that we need to step back from the things that occupy our minds and take time out to connect with our inner self, giving our minds, bodies, and spirits the time they need to reenergize and heal.

At first it may seem that by taking a break we may not be as productive as we would initially like. In reality, a healthy period of rest is something that gives us a real sense of the unlimited nature of our true potential. Spending a couple of minutes walking outside, doing a few yoga poses, meditating, or simply becoming attuned to the rising and falling of our breath enables us to let go of our worries. This act brings our focus back to the things that are truly essential for us, such as our sense of oneness with the universe and our inner peace and well-being. As we begin to get in touch with this part of ourselves, we will find that our usual everyday troubles and worries become less critical and that we not only have much more room in our lives to really reflect on the issues that mean the most to us, but we are also able bring to all the situations we encounter a much more positive and healthy outlook.

Giving ourselves respite from our daily concerns is like giving a gift to ourselves. By stepping away from the problems that seem to saturate our thoughts, we lessen the weight of our troubles and instead become more receptive to the wisdom and answers the universe has to offer us.

Daily OM for March 18th – A Matter of Priorities

A Matter of Priorities
Letting Go of the Little Stuff

 

When we stop worrying about unimportant matters, we can devote so much more of ourselves to what is truly important.
We experience numerous disappointments each and every day. Our expectations go unmet, our plans are blocked by circumstance, our wishes go unfulfilled, and we discover that our lives are subject to a myriad of forces beyond our conscious control. In some cases, our response is powerful because we must invest ourselves and our resources to overcome genuine hardship. In others, our reactions are far more passionate than our circumstances likely warrant. The tension that permeates our bodies and minds when we are late for an event, interrupted at work, or sitting in traffic is not inappropriate, but it can interfere with our well-being in profound ways. When we stop worrying about relatively unimportant matters, we can be at peace and devote so much more of ourselves to what is truly important.

The small frustrations and irritations wield such power over us because they rob us of the illusion of control. But every problem is a potential teacher—a confusing situation is an opportunity to practice mindfulness, and difficult people provide us with opportunities to display compassion. There is a natural human tendency to invest copious amounts of emotional energy in minor dilemmas and frustrations in order to avoid confronting those more complex issues that are largely outside the realm of our control. The intensity of our response provides us with a temporary sense of personal power that helps us cope with challenges that might otherwise overwhelm us. But it is only when we let the little stuff go that we discover that the big stuff is not really so devastating after all.

In the stress of a singularly tense incident, differentiating between an inconsequential annoyance and a legitimate challenge can seem a monumental task. Ask yourself whether the emotions you are feeling will be as vivid in a year, a day, or even an hour. As focused as you are on this moment in time, your reward for letting go of your emotional investment may be the very happiness and harmony of being whose loss you are lamenting. Needless aggravation is seldom worth the cost it exacts. You cannot distance yourself from life’s inconsistencies, irritations, and upheavals, but you can relinquish your desire for perfect order and gain peace of mind in the process.

Daily OM for March 15 – Acknowledging Our Pain

Acknowledging Our Pain
Rescuing the Rescuer

 

 

Sometimes the motivation to help others may be an extension of a deep desire to heal a wounded part of ourself. 

Some people seem called to help others, often from very early on in their childhoods, responding to the needs of family members, strangers, or animals with a selflessness that is impressive. Often, these people appear to have very few needs of their own, and the focus of their lives is on rescuing, helping, and healing others. While there are a few people who are truly able to sustain this completely giving lifestyle, the vast majority has needs that lie beneath the surface, unmet and often unseen. In these cases, their motivation to help others may be an extension of a deep desire to heal a wounded part of themselves that is starving for the kind of love and attention they dole out to those around them on a daily basis. For any number of reasons, they are unable to give themselves the love they need and so they give it to others. This does not mean that they are not meant to be helping others, but it does mean that they would do well to turn some of that helping energy within.

One problem with the rescuer model is that the individual can get stuck in the role, always living in crisis mode at the expense of inner peace and personal growth. Until the person resolves their own inner dramas, they play them out in their relationships with others, drawn to those who need them and often unable to acknowledge their own needs or get them met. In the worst-case scenario, they enable the other person’s dilemma by not knowing when to stop playing the rescuer and allow the person to figure it out on their own. However, if the rescuer finds the strength to turn within and face the needy aspects of their own psyche, he or she can become a model of empowerment and a true source of healing in the world.

Some signs that you or someone you love may need to rescue the rescuer within are inner burnout from overgiving; underlying resentment; an inability to admit to having needs of one’s own; and an unwillingness to be vulnerable. Help comes when we allow ourselves to admit we need it, acknowledging our humanity and our wholeness by acknowledging our pain. The understanding we gain in the process will naturally inform and inspire our ability to help those in need to do the same.

March 5 – Daily Feast

March 5 – Daily Feast
It is sad when our children have not been able to reply on us to build their self-esteem. The Cherokees call it qa lv quo di. Even those of us that have come a long way have memories that need a loving touch. Parents teach only what they know to teach. But we are not set forever in one direction. We reach an age when we must teach ourselves. We learn to forgive and to understand that when we get to the fork in the road we will know the right way. Why go the wrong way because someone before us did? If our self-esteem has been damaged, feeding it more pity and more ill-treatment is not healing it. Criticism is passed to us the same way blue eyes and dark hair are inherited. But criticism can be changed and replaced with love. This is a decision that changes our lives – and those who follow as well.

~ Civilized people depend too much on man-made printed pages. I turn to the Great Spirit’s book which is the whole of his creation. ~

TATNGA MANI

‘A Cherokee Feast of Days’, by Joyce Sequichie Hifler

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