Category: A Laugh for Today
Some Humor for Your Day
This is my home because according to Big Dawg my snoring could wake the dead. I am no necromancer, so I definitely don’t want to wake those bodies in the ground.
Good Day WOTC Family and Friends! What is On Your Mind Today?
I am sorry today’s posts went up so late, but I haven’t been sleeping well again and was to exhausted yesterday to do anything more but cuddle with Star, Merlin, and Cleo on the couch. I will get part of Sunday’s posts done today and the rest tomorrow. I am still very tired at my age and with my health difficulties 4 hours of broken sleep for a week doesn’t let my brain function as it normally does.
How are you doing today?
Some Humor for Your Day c. 2016
Overnight Karma
Mildred, the self-appointed arbiter of the community’s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people’s business. Several members were unappreciative of her activities, but they feared her enough to maintain their silence. She made a mistake, however, when she accused George, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his pickup truck parked in front of the town’s only bar one afternoon. She commented to George and others that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.
George, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just walked away. He didn’t explain, defend, or deny, he said nothing. Later that evening, George quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house… and left it there all night.
Some Humor for Your Day
Some Humor for Your Day
Some Humor for Your Day
Hello WOTC Family and Friends
Greetings Sisters, Brothers, and friends it is good to be back with you all. I am back this morning even though later than usual because of not falling asleep until 2 AM CDT and than getting up later than my normal 6:00 or so AM CDT. Needless to say the posting times starting at 9:00 AM CDT today have not started on time and I am working slower as every few minutes I am wiping away tears because my Dreamcicle is not here to help me stay on task.
We are still in emotional roller coaster mode in our home between the wedding and Dreamer’s crossing. So, with getting up late after crying myself to sleep and not having my Dreamcicle lying next to my desk nudging me with her nose or licking my ankles or trying to fit under my desk to cuddle while I am trying to type and post making it harder to concentrate this morning. I will be doing only 5 of the regular daily posts for today but all the regular day posts for Monday will go live this afternoon. I miss her so much but it is harder on Big Dawg because she has always been and always will be his big baby girl.
Thank you all for your warm, kind words and support during my time off! I really wanted to extend it for a few more days but as I am already coming back a day later than planned, I feel it would not be fair to you for me to extend it. Plus, I had to face coming back to my desk alone and I figure the longer I put it off the harder it would be to get back to work. So, if you feel sad energy coming from the posts for a few days it is because I am trying to get use to a new normal in my daily routine.
This morning I feel like the tortoise from the story of The Tortoise and The Hare…slow and steady wins the race. OK, onward with Sunday’s and Monday’s posts.
A Little Humor for Your Day – ‘Rules For Being Human’ c. 2014
Rules For Being Human
You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around.
You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called LIFE. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like these lessons or think them irrelevant or stupid. It makes no difference, you will learn lessons.
There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial and error, experimentation. The “failed” experiment that ultimately “works.”
A lesson is repeated until learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson.
Learning lessons does not end. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.
“There” is no better than “Here.” When your “There” has become a “Here” you will simply obtain another “There” that will again, look better than “Here.”
Others are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.
What you make of life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources that you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is YOURS.
The answers to life’s questions lie inside of you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust
You will get what you ask for. It may not be what you wanted, but it will be what you asked for.
UPON ENTERING THIS LEVEL OF EXISTENCE, YOU WILL FORGET ALL OF THE ABOVE.
Some Humor for Your Day
The virus can wipe out time you can spend with WOTC!
A Little Humor for Your Day – “People Go To Psychics for Strange Reasons, lol! c.2016
A Laugh for Today
You Know Someone Is New
To Magick And New Age Ideology
When They Think That …
An ATHAME is the gas you use for your grill.
A CENSOR is a drink you mix with alcohol.
ASTRAL PROJECTION is a home-made movie viewer.
A SYMPATHITIC LINK is when you feel sorry because your chain broke.
WICCA is that part of the candle that burns.
APHRODITE is a prehistoric bird.
ARCHETYPES is a kind of building structure.
BLESSED BE is the god of insects.
A BOOK OF SHADOWS contains silhouettes of friends or family members.
A BRAZIER is support wear for women.
CASTING is done with a fishing line, or on a set in Hollywood.
CHARGING is done with a credit card or battery.
The only way to get into a CIRCLE is to have the right of way.
Crystal CLEANSING is done with window cleaner.
CYCLES have to do with your washing machine and when to add fabric softener.
DEMETER is where you put your quarter when you park downtown.
A DOLMAN is a new brand of banana.
HANDFASTING is eating without utensils.
LEY LINES happen at the airport in Hawaii.
PAN is something you fry food in.
A QUARTER is 25 cents and still buys a cup of coffee. (Note: This person is not only new to magick, but they also haven’t been out in a while!)
SKYCLAD is a shade of blue clothing.
A TRAD is a type of geometrical figure.
WHEEL OF FORTUNE is the game show with Vanna White.
A Laugh for Today – Witch Broom Jokes
Witches use broomsticks to travel. Rumor has it that they chose broomsticks as their mode of transport because vacuum cleaners were too heavy. Brooms tend to be the most prominent subject of witch jokes and witch puns. We’ve compiled a list of funny witch broom jokes to make being a witch pun for you.
How do witches play loud music? On their broom boxes.
What did the mother broom say to the baby broom? It’s time to go sweep.
What do you call a fast broomstick? A vroom-stick.
What does the little witch use to bake her birthday cake? The easy bake coven.
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick? Voodoo like to ride with me.
Why was the broom late? It over swept.
What did one broomstick say to the other? Did you hear the new dirt?
Why do witches only ride their broomsticks at night? That’s the time to sweep.
What do you call a witch’s spotless garage? A broom closet.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween? The witches sweep the sky.
How do you find out if a witch is carrying a bomb? You hear her brooms tick.
What do you call a witch who keeps crashing her brooms? A wreckless hag.
Why did the witch’s team lose the cricket game? Their bats flew away.
Why did the witch put her broomstick inside the washing machine? She wanted a clean sweep.
Some Humor for Your Day
Sometimes…
Sometimes
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Some Humor for Saturday
1. What do Ghosts suffer from?
Saturday fright fever.
2. Why are Saturday and Sunday strong?
Because all the other days are week days.
3. What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
4. If you think Thursday are depressing, wait two days
Then it would be a sadder day (Saturday)
5. John Travolta tested negative for Coronavirus last night.
Turns out is was just a Saturday Night Fever.
6. Why could I not attend my friend’s dumplings party on Saturday morning?
Because I had to wok on Friday night.
Some Humor for Your Day
A Little Humor for Your Day – “Things A Witch’s Significant Other May Say”
Some Humor for Your Day
What can you do to prevent a summer cold? Catch it in winter.
In the summer, what do snowmen do? Chillout.
What word does a mermaid use to address her friends? A shell phone, of course.
What do you pay to enjoy the beach for a day? Sand dollars.
Why did the detectives show up at the concert on the beach? Something fishy was going on.
On Tarzan’s summer vacation, where did he go? Hollywood and Vine.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.
What kind of sandwich is best for the beach? Peanut butter and jellyfish.
Brown, hairy, and wearing sunglasses, what is it A coconut on summer vacation.
Where is your pet bird’s favorite summer vacation destination? The Canary Islands!
What makes a seagull fly above water? Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.
Some Humor for Your Day
My students aren’t afraid to ask questions
“How do you spell toad?” one of my first-grade students asked.
“We just read a story about a toad,” I said, then helped him spell it out: “T-O-A-D.”
Satisfied, he finished writing the story he’d begun, then read it aloud: “I toad my mama I wanted a dog for my birthday.”
Some Humor for Your Day
Why did the kid think it was Sunday?
Because the sun is out!
Why did the Sun cover its eyes on Sunday?
It saw the back side of the moon.
What is a vampire’s least favourite day?
Sunday
Which day of the week do sunflowers adore?
Sunday
Sunday and Monday are in a fight. Who wins?
Sunday. Monday is a weak day.
What do you call a barber that refuses to close on Sundays?
A Hair-etic.
Why do hot dogs and Sundays go together so well?
Because that’s not the wurst thing for a day at the ballpark.
What do you call somebody who only experiences extreme anxiety on Saturday and Sunday?
A weekend worrier.
What day is ice cream day?
Sunday!
Which day of the week makes you happy in the morning and sad at bedtime?
Sunday.
What is the nastiest word you can use on Sunday?
Monday!
Why is Sunday such a fun day?
Because all you really have to do is sleep until you’re hungry, and then eat until you feel sleepy.
Why are the week days actually the strongest days of the week?
Because they all work out.
Why do I always feel great on Saturday and Sunday, and sick on all the other days?
Maybe I just have a weekend immune system.
Witches Of The Craft® 
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