Look To Your Past

Look To Your Past

Author:   Oracle  

One of the most controversial stances today in the Neo-Pagan Community surrounds the adoption of Amerindian and other aboriginal ceremonies as authentic paths for those who are not of Amerindian or aboriginal descent. When Europeans first landed on the shores of North and South America en masse, the exotic and “unnatural” ways of these people may have struck a chord that resonated with some Europeans. At this time, Europeans were only familiar with Christianity, and all else was “of the devil.” Naturally some people who were beneficent towards the tribes may have eventually found themselves adopted and taught the path of whatever tribe adopted them. It eventually became a crime in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries in the United States of America tantamount to treason to “go Indian.” The fate of many tribes followed one of four courses:

1. Many tribes were wiped out.

2. Many that survived found themselves and their subsequent generations adopting “American ways” and indoctrinated with Christianity, also taking up “Christian names.”

3. Many fought and were relocated from their homelands to western deserts.

4. Many merely surrendered and tried to reconcile their own beliefs, integrating Christian doctrines into their own while attempting to maintain some sort of independence.

With the merger of the Hippie and New Age movements in the 1960’s within the States, many books began to be released on the market that introduced Eastern and pseudo-aboriginal concepts into the American spiritual scene. Naturally a new type of imperialism began taking place. In this new form of conquering, Amerindian Tribes found their spiritual teachings bastardized by “white culture, ” ironically at the same time that the Neo-Pagan movement was also budding.

Sadly, what was meant to be a Spiritual Renaissance for those of European descent instead became a fast track where modern American cultural norms (e.g. instant results, eclectic spirituality, and a dogmatic “I have a right to this” attitude) rooted in centuries of Christian imperialism gained a new avenue to glamorize and steal from Amerindian tribes what was not theirs. Terms like “Shaman” became new catch words to describe those that attended weekend seminars, wore crystals and painted their bodies.

Cloaked within the White Light of the New Age is the insult of ancient ancestors which are linked inexorably to the Tribes whose Elders are fighting to preserve the remains of their people; their homes having been taken, their languages lost and their people massacred in the name of the white man’s “progress.” With the 1993 Lakota Declaration of War against Exploiters of Lakota Spirituality, the Tribal Elders of various Tribal cultures and Tribal religions have reinforced the closure of their doors. To force open the doors of another culture is a practice that is relegated to the inherent dominance of the Abrahamic faiths, not the Pagan.

Some of the justifications for cultural theft are:

Q: But what if I believe I was an Indian in my past life?
A: Sorry, but many Native American religions don’t incorporate reincarnation. Regardless if they did, that was a past life…it’s over and you have this one.

Q: But what if something speaks to me in that path?
A: You will find a parallel form in your own heritage. There are plenty of Reconstructionist paths available for those of European descent so that Wica is not the only option anymore (and, with a bit of research, never was) . There is Strix, Strega, Asatru, Druidry, Hermetic, Kemetic and more. These cultural religions and philosophies in the West are open for Europeans to journey and find meaning. It may be that what you are seeing may resonate with you because your ancestors performed something similar.

Q: But so-and-so said they were taught by Medicine people and, for a fee, will also teach me to help improve my life…is this wrong?
A: Unless they are a genuine Tribal Elder, I encourage you to do some research into your supposed “teacher.” Tribal Elders, if you are adopted and taught their ways (which take decades by the way) , never will charge a fee to teach. Many false shamans see the profits and none are ever shared with any Native American Communities.

Q: What if I feel “Indian” at heart?
A: By all means admire the beauty and culture of the Tribal people, but respect and courtesy should be given when it is not your heritage.

We Pagans should have different ethics in order to help build bridges. As an example, we as a Community have held the sins of the Church at its feet: murdering and killing many who were, rightly or falsely, accused of Witchcraft. We demanded the Church acknowledge its erroneous ways and beg pardon. This was done in 1999, and the late Pope John Paul II heard the cries of the wronged and declared a papal apology in 2000. As a reminder, the late Pope said:

“…Christians have often denied the Gospel; yielding to a mentality of power, they have violated the rights of ethnic groups and peoples, and shown contempt for their cultures and religious traditions…”

The Pagan Community cheered and clapped in the Pope’s response, and even more respect was garnered for the late Pope John Paul II.

Yet, here we are in 2010 and the Pagan Community has committed the same sins for the past 50 years. We observe Tribal Elders and spiritual leaders offer tobacco, asperge with sage and chant with feathers. We watch their masked ceremonies and listen to their singing, all the while believing we can adopt and adapt something we see without any inclination as to the “why” behind the rituals.

We build Medicine Wheels on our front lawn believing that we have a right to that heritage. We take pseudo-Indian names such as “Running Buffalo Horns” and think nothing of it. Sadly, and naively, we talk about the “Native American path, ” “Native American religion, ” and “Native American culture.” We talk about the beauty and purity of the “Native American belief system, ” like we are describing some new pet breed.

There is no such thing as “Native American culture, ” “Native American religion, ” and a “Native America path.” There are Native American cultures, Native American religions, and Native America paths. Each tribe differs greatly from one to the next.

In Neo-Paganism in general, ancestral veneration is not given any preeminence. Carl Jung’s idea of “archetypes” has neatly found itself in our Community so that we talk about “THE God” and “THE Goddess.” I find Dion Fortune oft-quoted, “All the Gods are One God, and all the Goddesses are One Goddess, and there is but One Initiator.” A lovely quote, but misplaced. Dion also emphasized that people should look to their own roots to find true occult virtue.

You see, Tribal Spiritualities are all about the Community over the Individual (unlike many solitary Western Neo-Pagan paths) , and the Mighty Spirits and Powers that are reverenced in Native American religions are deified Ancestral spirits. Rites, rituals, chants and dances are done to live out the mythos and deeds of that Tribes’ ancestors. If you are not of that blood, why are you reverencing ancestors that are not your own? Can it not be said that someone who steals part of a heritage that one has not been privy to is actually disrespecting the heritage you come from? Basically, you’re telling your own ancestors, “You’re not good enough for me.”

The Jungian view of archetypes has no place in Native American religions. They evolved along a different occult current and are rooted in land and ancestors, blood and bone. What does your own blood call to you? What do your bones sing?

We Pagans constantly talk about the sins of the Church, and how we should “harm none” (regardless if we’re Wiccan or not) and respect all life. Yet here we are stealing what is not ours, and not looking to our own ancestors for what our own blood and bones holds dear. Our own power lies in our heritage. Many say, “Well, what if I am Welsh, Greek, Italian and Spanish? Which is my path?” My response is: all of it. They are all Indo-European. In our modern society there is no excuse with the plethora of Native European Spiritualities why we should steal someone else’s heritage, which is not ours.

I encourage our Community to not be hypocritical and disrespect the ethnic cultures of the land we live on. I encourage our Community to have open dialogue and build bridges with the Native American tribes (and others) so that we can change the tide of our Imperialist past. If we truly believe in peace and respect, then we will do so by cultivating Wisdom, Integrity, Truth, Courage and Honor in our own lives.

I encourage everyone to look to our own past, beyond the past 2, 000 years of Christianity, and remember that we were once tribal and had a culture to speak of. Unlike the Amerindian Tribes, the Western Pagan faiths have their doors open so we can seek our Gods and Ancestors to reverence again.

May the Blessing of the Lord and Lady guide you upon the Starry Path of Enlightenment.

~Oracle~

____________________________________________

Footnotes:
Sources:
http://www.newagefraud.org/. Retrieved April 19, 2010.

Brown, Michael F. “Who Owns Native Culture?” Retrieved from http://www.williams.edu/go/native/index.htm

Orrin. “Seeking Native American Spirituality: Read This First!” Retrieved from http://www.native-languages.org/religion.htm.

Fortune, Dion. (2000) . The Training and Work of an Initiate. York Beach, ME: Samuel Weiser.

Fortune, Dion. (2001) . What is Occultism? York Beach, ME: Samuel Weiser.

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Today’s Tarot Card for December 12th is The Hierophant

The Hierophant

Thursday, Dec 12th, 2013

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Traditionally known as the Hierophant, this card refers to a Master and the learning of practical lessons from the study of Natural Law. This energy of this card points to some agent or resource that can reveal the secrets of life, the cycles of the moon and tides, the links between human beings and the heavens.

Because monasteries were the only places a person could learn to read and write in the middle ages, a Hierophant was one to whom a student would petition for entry. He was the one to set the curriculum for the neophyte’s course of study.

Often pictured with the right hand raised in blessing, the Hierophant is linked with the ancient lineage of Melchezidek, initiator of the Hebrew priestly tradition, the one who passes on the teachings. All shamans of any tradition draw upon this archetype

Today’s Tarot Card for November 19th is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

Tuesday, Nov 19th, 2013

Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Your Animal Spirit for November 5th is The Cardinal

Your Animal Spirit for Today
November 5, 2013

Cardinal

Wake up! Cardinal is chirping at you—bringing a message of personal power. Stop shrinking from your destiny. Stop pretending that you are less than. If you are unsure of your path, ask Cardinal to fly with you—it’s certain he will help you focus, gain clarity, formulate a plan, become self-assured, and step out into the world with the confidence befitting a person of your power.

Today’s Tarot Card for January 23 is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

Wednesday, Jan 23rd, 2013

Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Today’s Tarot Card for December 28th is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

Friday, Dec 28th, 2012

Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Today’s Tarot Card for November 18th is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

Sunday, Nov 18th, 2012

Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Today’s Tarot Card for September 19th is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

This Tarot Deck: Fantastical Tarot

 

General Meaning:  Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Today’s Tarot Card for July 21 is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

This Tarot Deck: Cosmic

 

General Meaning: Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Today’s Tarot Card for July 1 is The High Priestess

Today’s Tarot Card

The High Priestess

This Tarot Deck: Fantastical Tarot

General Meaning:    Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.
For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.
In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

Wishing You The Very Best On This Gorgeous Tuesday!

Have a Good, Great Day Images, Quotes, Comments, Graphics

Good Tuesday morning, my dearest of friends! I hope you are having a great day. Me, well, it’s getting better! Since that last couple of days have been sort of blah, blah for me, I decided to start the day off on a different note.

With a little Irish  Humor….

WHAT IS AN IRISHMAN

An Irishman is a man who?

May not believe there is a God,
but is darn sure of the infallibility of the Pope…
Won’t eat meat on Friday,
but will drink Jameson for breakfast…..
Has great respect for the truth,
he uses in emergencies…
Sees things not as they are
but the way they never will be…..
Cries at sad movies,
but cheers in battle….
Hates the English,
but reserves his cruelty for countryman…. Gets more Irish the further he gets from Ireland…..
Believes in civil rights,
but not in his neighborhood…
Believes to forgive is divine,
therefore doesn’t exercise it himself….
Loves religion for its own sake,
but also because it makes it so
inconvenient for his neighbors….
Scorns money,
but worships those who have it…
Considers any Irishman who
achieves success to be a traitor

Today’s Tarot Card for June 11th is The High Priestess

The High Priestess

This Tarot Deck: Cosmic

General Meaning:

Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries.

the daily humorscopes for friday, june 8

the daily humorscope 

Friday, June 08, 2012

 

Aries

(March 21 – April 19)

You would be ill-advised to try to shoot kidney beans out your nose, today. (Yes, I know you were thinking of it.)

Taurus

(April 20 – May 20)

Go wild today! Try a different brand of ramen noodles — or even go so far as to sprinkle a little chopped green onion over them!

Gemini

(May 21 – June 20)

You will think of something hysterically funny, but not have anyone to tell it to.

 

Cancer

(June 21 – July 22)

Good day to go around “nudging” people.

Leo

(July 23 – August 22)

You’re fussing with your hair too much. Perhaps you should temporarily cut back on shampoo. Or at least demand real poo.

Virgo

(August 23 – September 22)

Would you just Stop? Nobody else feels the need to dance around like that…

Libra

(September 23 – October 22)

While idly doodling on a notepad, today, you will accidentally draw a symbol sacred to an ancient voodoo deity, and will open a gap into part of the astral plane that is even less appealing than Akron, Ohio.

Scorpio

(October 23 – November 21)

You will stack furniture in the bathtub, today. That’s just the sort of thing you would do, your friends will say.

Sagittarius

(November 22 – December 21)

Chaos will ensue, when you are accidentally hit by a motorist, just as a bus full of lawyers specializing in insurance claims is passing by on the way to a conference. The bus will literally erupt into a heaving mass of clawing, screaming, and briefcase-bashing lunatics. Eventually they’ll take out a class-action lawsuit against you.

Capricorn

(December 22 – January 20)

Beware the Ides of March. Also, if you have a friend named “Brutus”, it might behoove you to be a trifle more selective…

 

Aquarius

(January 21 – February 18)

You will see an ancient symbol appearing in the whorls of your fingerprints. That, combined with the dreams of apocalypse may make you worry. I wouldn’t though — it’s just a vitamin B12 deficiency.

 

Pisces

(February 19 – March 20)

You should look into some of that new “dream interpretation” software. That recurring dream about being naked in a hot tub with the Pope and Bill Gates is probably a really common one.

Happy & Blessed Tuesday to you, my dear, dear friends!

Tuesday Pictures, Comments, Graphics, Cards
Ok, forget the boots! This grabbed my attention because this is just what me and Razzy had just finished doing. She has a collection of shoe strings. When she wants to play, here she comes with the tip in her mouth, dragging the rest under her belly. I am going to have to take a picture of her one day and show you, she is so cute when she does this. I have been trying to teach her to keep her claws in. She was doing pretty good till today. I think I pissed her off. I just wasn’t moving fast enough for her this morning. So she gave me a smack or two on the back of my leg to wake me up. And I gave her a pop on her rump to let her know I was wake, lol!

My cat’s antics wasn’t what I wanted to write to you about today. But she so cute, I can’t help it, lol! What was on my mind is some comments I have been getting about the “About Us” page. I have been promoting this site pretty hot and heavy at different spots on the web. I ought to know that when I do that, I better put on my tough skin (more like armoured suit!). Most of the comments have been really nice. They are thanking me for showing them this site and they wish others could see what we are really like. At least, we are getting through to some. But there are others that have gotten under my skin. You know yourself, you have never heard me attack another Religion. I won’t do it. I will not do it. NEVER! I try to teach tolerance of each other’s Religions. With tolerance we can learn from each other and eventually accept each other. But when I have individuals that write to me and tell me that witches are psychotic and thank God we live in a free country or else we would be locked up. That is taking it too far and it reminds me of a time not so long ago in our history. It PISSES me to the bottom. Also there is no such thing in the universe as magic, anyone that believes in magic is living in their own little world. As long as they stay in their own little world, they are no threat to anyone. Since there is no magic in the universe, there are no such things as witches. Anyone that calls themself a witch is delusional. 

Now, my brothers and sisters in the Craft do you see why I turn to you for comfort? I need your love, comfort and support. I am mad as hell. I have fought ignorance all my life and it seems ignorance has reared its ugly head again. I am still promoting this site and I really don’t want to go off on a binge. But a witch can only take so much and for those of you new to this site, please forgive me. But stop to consider if someone attacked your Religion. How would you feel? Witchcraft is a religious practice. We have been tormented throughout history by ignorant fools. Do you not realize the first person to outlaw our practices was a Catholic Pope? Why? It wasn’t because our religious practices was bad, demonic, satanic, or any of that. It was because he was money hunger, land hunger, wanted the world. The only way he could do that was to condemn innocent people to their death and the church seize their earthly goods. Yes, it was to make the Church powerful and rich. Our Religion is old as time itself. In the beginning, we were the only Religion that existed. We worshipped the Earth, Nature, and most of all our Loving Goddess, the Mother of All Creation. Our people had to go underground to worship and pass our teachings down from generation to generation. We could not write our Religion down, anyone caught with such was condemned to death. All our Religion has ever known is persecution, hatred and death. We are a strong Religion, Yes, Religion. Just because our Religion has been casted in a bad light for all these centuries does not mean we are evil. Our Religion was given this brand because people were afraid the truth would actually come out about us.  Well the truth is coming out about us know. People are turning to our Religion because they are fed up with the mainstream Religions. They are finding out for theirselves what we are about. They are seeking the truth and myself and others like me are here to make sure they see the truth. We are a peaceful Religion. You will never find in the history books our Religion calling for killings in the name of Religion. We worship the Goddess and we respect all life. Life to us, no matter how small is sacred to us. We cherish every living creature. We harm no one. And for those of you that thing there is no such thing as a Witch. I am here to tell you, you are dead wrong. For I AM A WITCH! I don’t have green skin or a long, pointy nose with warts. I look like your neighbor next door. You see what make me different from you. I have found the power of magick, YES MAGICK! There is magick in this world. I am sorry for those who are too ignorant to open their eyes and behold the magick that is all around them. I am sorry that you haven’t looked inside yourself and seen the magick in you. Each of us has the magick in us, no matter what Religion you are the magick is there. You just have to look inside and see it. You see, WITCHES, have looked inside, found the magick and have learned to control it. We can wheel the magick to do our bidding. We can wheel the magick to right the wrong in the Universe. We can wheel the magick to help mankind. You see that is what our mission is, to help and better mankind. We mean no one any harm, but we will not stand by and let ourselves be harmed either. We have Laws we live by and most of us believe in the Karmic Law.

You see, there is Witches in this Universe. We live among you. We could be your neighbor but you will never know. We want to leave in peace. We want our Religion to be recognized for what it is, a Religion. We want to educate the public. To dispel all the old myths that still cast a shadow on our Religion to this day. For those of you that think there is no such thing as a Witch. I pity you. For you see, we will experience the most beautiful life anyone can imagine. The Goddess will shower us with Her Love and show us wonders beyond our beliefs. We will behold things, you will never be able to. There are many things in life, you will never know and it is ashame because all you would have to do is open your mind and heart.

In the service of my Goddess,

Lady Of The Abyss

the daily humorscope 

Sunday, January 01, 2012

 
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Do not snitch a jelly donut today, when nobody is looking. The chocolate frosted one is much better.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Today you will invent a new type of automated squid sorter, for use by professional squid fishermen. You will call it the Squid Pro Quo. That will be a mistake.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Today you will discover a strange-looking thing in your underwear drawer. Best not to tell anyone.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
Today you will see a free floating full torso vaporous apparition! It’ll turn out that your glasses are smudged.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Today you will discover a lot of money under your pillow! Unfortunately, it won’t begin to cover the cost of the dentures that you will also discover a sudden need for.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Don’t lose hope! Conditions like yours are painful and embarassing, but often clear up on their own.
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
You look ridiculous in that. Go and change.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
You are about to start a band, with friends, which will be called “Rainy Daze”. You will choose that name primarily because one of your group simply doesn’t care for “Clenched Buttocks” as a band name.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
You’ll become best pals with a large invisible rabbit, today. Well, actually he’s a “puka”, which is a type of Celtic spirit, but he’ll look like a large invisible rabbit.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 20)
Good day to make a call from a pay-phone in a busy place, and say (in a loud voice) “You dumped the body WHERE?”.
Aquarius (January 21 – February 18)
Today you will wonder where idiomatic expressions come from, and whether you can start one yourself. Be careful, though. The first person to say “nothing succeeds like success” must have sounded like a real idiot.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
You should look into some of that new “dream interpretation” software. That recurring dream about being naked in a hot tub with the Pope and Bill Gates is probably a really common one.