Cloud Scrying

Most of us watch clouds form images at one time or another. It is as if we are guided to look up and watch the patterns unfold at a given time. Fluffy cumulous clouds bring messages, which sometimes seem to tell an unfolding story. While flying on an airplane, it is fun to watch the clouds from above as if celestial art. You may receive telepathic messages while watching cloud images, coming from a spirit guide.

Throughout history symbols of political or religious importance have been seen in the clouds. In A.D. 312 when Emperor Constantine was marching against the army of Maxentius at Rome, both he and his entire army saw a shining cross of light amid the clouds. It was said the cross contained the Greek words “By This Conquer”. Later that night Christ appeared to Constantine in his dreams bearing a cross in his hand ordering Constantine to have a military standard made in the same image. Under this standard his outnumbered army was victorious. Down through history entire military battles have been witnessed in the clouds.

Egyptian Dream Scrying

Ancient Egyptians believed in the power of dreams to bring messages from their many gods. Their methods of dream scrying go back over 5000 years and were recorded in their ancient texts and on hieroglyphic writings. Some of their techniques were later used by other ancient civilizations, as in ancient Greece thousands of years ago.

Ritual Dream Scrying Techniques

On the day you scry – find a place of solitude and remain alone.

Do not consume alcohol, eat for 4 hours before your begin, or engage in sexual activities.

Take a warm relaxing bath then anoint your temples with olive oil. You will need an oil lamp as used with lamp scrying.

On a short narrow strip of white linen write the name of the Egyptian God and the purpose for the dream scrying. Twist the linen strip into a wick and insert into the oil of the lamp. Place the lamp on a table beside your bed. Using the ink draw the image of the dream God upon your left palm.

Light your lamp. Kneel before the lamp. Invocation:

Concentrating on the image on your left hand recite the following invocation : Thoth, (use name of desired god) I invoke, blessed power of dreams divine, Angel of future fates, swift wings are thine, Great source of oracles to human kind, When stealing soft, and whispering to the mind, Through sleep’s sweet silence and the gloom of night, Thy power awake the sight, To silent souls the will of heaven relates, And silently reveals their future fates.

Concentrate on your question. Around your left hand wrap a piece of black linen about four inches wide and about thirty inches long. The black cloth is called the black eye of Isis. – the Magic of Isis – or Black Isis.

Blow out the lamp’s flame. Clear your mind and go to sleep.

Have a tape recorder or pen and paper beside your bed so that when you awaken you may record your dreams while still fresh in your mind.

You will find that the dream will come to you in a voice that is clear and powerful rather than in dream images. Sometimes the messages are in symbols – cryptic forms. Take your time in deciphering the messages you have received. You may want to use a dream dictionary to interpret messages given, if possible. They are often archetypes from your subconscious mind, perhaps from an Egyptian lifetime.

Your Daily Horoscopes for Friday, July 20

We attract more attention than we really want today since the lively Leo Moon encourages us to be bold and place our feelings out in the open. Although we know how important it is to make time for relaxation and enjoyment, an anxious alignment between optimistic Jupiter and realistic Saturn reminds us we must fulfill our responsibilities before taking off for the weekend. Relying on sound logic is more valuable now than pursuing our desires.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

You’re probably feeling more positive about what you are doing with your life now, but you may be afraid of moving too fast and missing something important. You are enthused because it seems as if you just woke up from a deep sleep. However, rather than acting impulsively, it’s best to proceed slowly and deliberately. If you work yourself into a frenzy of activity today, you might have to retreat so that you don’t go over the edge.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

Two facets of your personality clash today without a clear winner. Unfortunately, the more you try to hold on to your original plan, the harder it will be to resolve the current tension. Nevertheless, it’s challenging to decide how far to go in reviewing and revising your agenda. You could end up wasting precious resources by making the wrong choice. Although uncertainty doesn’t feel good, the best solutions will come on their own accord if you simply remain open to change.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

You can easily run circles around everyone else now because you are at the top of your game. Others may find you irresistible today but it’s crucial not to overplay your hand. If you appear too confident, you might attract the very same attention you were attempting to avoid. Your plans could backfire if you try too hard, so relax and let the day unfold at its own pace.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

Opening your heart to a trustworthy companion today could make you a bit uncomfortable. As sensitive as you are, try not to get too caught up in the response you receive to your emotional disclosure. What anyone else thinks now isn’t as important as what you are feeling. Ultimately, you are better off once you share what’s on your mind, even if your trust isn’t immediately reciprocated. The awkward moment is temporary, but your relationship will improve for the long-term if you’re willing to take the risk.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

The Moon is back in your sign, encouraging you to let everyone know exactly what you want. However, expressing your needs could create problems if you seem too demanding. Concentrating on your desires prevents you from being fully present in a relationship, and you may not even notice if another person is already offering you love and support. Paradoxically, removing yourself from the spotlight is a more reliable path to satisfaction now, so focus on others rather than yourself.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

What someone doesn’t say now can grab your attention, as if the unspoken words have additional power because they are kept secret. Your fear of the unknown might create a simple misunderstanding, especially if you assume the worst. But don’t try to fast talk your way around an awkward situation. Instead of lingering on your uncertainty, just say what’s on your mind and then move on.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

Someone comes through for you today, offering an enjoyable escape or a more meaningful chance to share what’s on your mind. If there’s nothing already on your social calendar, pick up the phone, call a few friends and see what kind of fun is possible. This can be a very satisfying day, but it may not amount to much unless you are willing to take responsibility to make something special happen.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

You might try to present yourself in a more official manner now that the demonstrative Leo Moon is visiting your 10th House of Public Status. However, you could inadvertently forget about your position and share more of yourself today than you intend. Acting professionally is a smart idea since your job needs to come first at this time. Even though you shouldn’t leave your emotions completely out of the picture, you are not under any obligation to reveal your secrets to anyone else.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

You’re encouraged by what’s happening now, but there is still missing information out there for you to uncover. Thankfully, you can enjoy your little hunt for critical data, but not if you’re just trying to amass personal power. Going into denial about the evidence is not a good idea, either; it’s just that the facts may not be as clear as you like. If you catch yourself drifting off into fantasyland, consciously bring yourself back to what’s real before you wander off too far.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

You might have to work harder than usual now because you believe that you must make a significant commitment to your career — especially if you are to reach your goals. However, your current fear of failure may just be a symptom of a deeper issue. Harsh self-judgment could stem from your uneasiness with your own ambitions. Be more accepting of what you have already accomplished instead of needlessly worrying about what’s next.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Tension in a partnership bubbles to the surface today, even if you didn’t see it coming. It’s quite likely that things are going well, yet there still may be difficult interactions as you express your ambiguity about your role in the relationship. Striving for clarity helps sweep away your clouds of uncertainty. Getting the conversational ball rolling will enable both parties to express their positions clearly so you can work toward establishing common ground.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

You might need to spend extra time in service to others now without receiving the recognition you deserve. This lack of acknowledgment could bring up old issues of low self-esteem. You don’t necessarily want to be in the spotlight, but you still may have resentment if someone else receives the applause. If this is an ongoing problem, it’s time to let those involved know. As long as your intentions are for the good of all, speak from your heart.

Your Weekend Lunar Love Horoscopes for July 20 – 22

Weekend Love: Lunar Love

by Jeff Jawer

It Takes All Kinds

July 20 – 22

Passion and playfulness take top billing this weekend, which starts with the scene-setting Moon in dramatic Leo and ends with the Sun’s entry into this expressive Fire sign on Sunday. Brave hearts and youthful spirits are the winning tickets to a good time during this buoyant period.
Friday gives us a chance to let our feelings roar with the Moon in the expressive sign of the Lion. Bragging and being pushy are less desirable ways to act, but it’s fine to be bold and come on strong when it’s done with a light touch. Brash behavior is tolerated as long as there’s no bullying involved.
A lunar shift into meticulous Virgo on Saturday afternoon tones down the theatrics and encourages practicality. Activities that mix work and play can be especially appealing in this productive sign. Yet even the most discreet individuals could be itching for excitement and willing to take chances in pursuit of new experiences. An adventurous Jupiter-Uranus sextile stimulates minds, spurring interest in unusual activities and unconventional people. Taking a relationship leap into unfamiliar territory is thrilling; adopting some healthy precautions in advance ensures a safer landing.
The Sun’s ingress into big-hearted Leo warms Sunday morning with innocence and, perhaps, a greater will to love, regardless of the risks.

Daily Horoscopes for Thursday, July 19

Our feelings are more powerful than usual today, yet we might withhold our emotions unless we feel safe and secure. The sensitive Cancer New Moon at 12:24 am EDT encourages us to nurture those we love while still keeping our own needs private. However, the Moon shifts into expressive Leo at 6:13 am EDT, enabling us to share the intensity of our dreams. Fortunately, taking the time to review the previous month helps us determine where to go next.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

Problems may arise today from your natural tendency to initiate action too quickly. You really want to make something special happen now, but are uncertain about how to move forward with the Cancer New Moon in your 4th House of Security. If your intuition suggests that it’s not yet time to start anything, you are better off waiting. There’s no reason to overcompensate by needlessly pushing your agenda too soon.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

You might end up spending much of the day sticking close to familiar routines, without much of a desire to do more than is necessary. It’s a quiet day, yet you have many things you want to say now that the Cancer New Moon occurs in your 3rd House of Communication. Speaking your piece is healthy, but listening to others is important, too. Your friends and co-workers will feel better if there is an equal give and take in their interactions with you.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

You could use a healthy dose of peace and quiet now. Although there are social activities on your calendar, you also are advised to create some time to be alone. However, this isn’t about being isolated or lonely. Rather, it is about listening to your own inner voice, which can all too often get crowded out by the everyday noises of your life. Meditating leaves you feeling rejuvenated and ready to mingle with others again.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

When you’re finished working today, head outside and catch some rays. Perhaps you could find time for some summer reading or listening to music. And even if you aren’t inclined to be in the Sun, at least make sure you utilize today’s New Moon in your sign to revitalize your soul. There’s no need to worry about accomplishing much now; just enjoy the experience of swimming around in the sea of your colorful inner world.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

You have intense desires that are building just beneath the surface. Often you Lions are quite up-front and just tell it as it is, but today a more secretive mood comes over you because of the cautious Cancer New Moon that activates your 12th House of Spiritual Mystery. You don’t have to act on every emotion, but neither do you have to push away your feelings, even if they further complicate your life. It’s better to proactively deal with a complicated issue than it is to just stay quiet.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Getting together with your friends sounds like a good idea now that the Cancer New Moon falls in your 11th House of Companions. However, something may hold you back. Maybe you’re busier than you want to be today. Since you are protective of your feelings, remember not to spread yourself too thin. If you end up partaking in some social fun, at least make it a low-key event. Save your energy for when you need it.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

Your ideal scenario today may consist of you crawling back into the privacy of your home and luxuriating in the idea that you don’t need to go anywhere or see anyone. But unfortunately, reality doesn’t let you off the hook so easily. You could be called upon to take responsibility for someone else and you must rise to the occasion. Nevertheless, you have invisible boundaries and still feel protected as if you are within your own shell, even if no one else notices.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Your intense feelings draw you into uncharted waters today as the Cancer New Moon emphasizes your 9th House of Adventure. There is a haunting familiarity to the landscape, whether or not you are eager for the next adventure. You can’t tell if you have been here before or if it was only a place that you imagined. Pay careful attention to all the details, for signs appear everywhere to reveal your future.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

You may feel on-edge today with the Cancer New Moon in your 8th House of Intimacy, especially if you’re pulled into an emotional drama that is one step over the edge of your comfort zone. Short of booking a ticket on an airplane, there isn’t much that you can do to avoid the intensity. Forget about trying to escape; just sink into your feelings, armed with the knowledge that they will change soon enough. There’s no reason to be overly concerned; you will be back to your buoyant self before you know it.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

You self-motivated Goats strive for stability now, even as you ambitiously climb higher on the mountain. But you don’t feel as sure-footed as you seem; nevertheless, emotional waters are swirling around your feet today. Thankfully, it’s perfectly safe to let your feet leave the ground. Swim through the mixed feelings, but don’t try to hold on to any of them along the way.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

You can feel the shift as the Moon enters your 6th House of Routine, taking you away from the high-flying thoughts and drawing you into a pool of feelings about your daily life. Try as you might to separate out the strands of emotions, they are interwoven. You might feel as if this emotional fabric is so heavy that it’s a burden. However, you’re still advised to wear it as if it were your own. Paradoxically, accepting your obligations magically lightens your load.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Although the Cancer New Moon in your 5th House of Romance suggests that you might need to start anew with respect to love, you don’t necessarily have to walk away from a current healthy relationship. Instead, consciously infuse your passions into a partnership, adding depth and magic to what you already have. But if you aren’t in a relationship, you may be hesitant to jump into one now. Move slowly for the best results.

Daily Horoscopes for Wednesday, July 18

We are ready to rebel against anything that constrains us today. Or, others may act out our need for freedom now if we try to deny it. Either way, an erratic Mars-Uranus opposition creates unstable tension. Although the emotionally sensitive Cancer Moon might increase our fear of change, we’re still likely to put ourselves in risky situations that raise our adrenaline levels prior to the Cancer New Moon tomorrow morning at 12:24 am EDT.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

This is a power-packed day with red-hot Mars negotiating between your desire for independence and your need to be loved. Remember, Mars is not known as a peacemaker, so his brand of diplomacy may incite conflict today. Things might reach a tipping point when you don’t know what’s going to happen next. Nevertheless, real progress toward finding lasting solutions can be made if you build the future upon mutual respect and positive intentions.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

Don’t lose sight of the value of your common sense since a total breakdown of routine at work can be circumvented if you maintain your composure. However, no one wants to face the difficult issues until all parties realize what’s at stake. Don’t be afraid to take an unpopular stand if necessary, for the current circumstances may require a disruption just to get everyone’s attention.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Usually you are the clever one who can miraculously pull a solution out of thin air, even if it is not a permanent one. But today, every tactic you try is met with surprising resistance or an unexpected response. The uncertainty is enough to make you lose confidence in your own ability to communicate. Don’t give up; your persistence could pay off once you hit on a strategy that settles down the energy.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

Relying on your intuition now is a smart way to stay on your path. However, just because you know how to respond, this doesn’t mean that you’ll be able to do what you believe is right. In fact, you may feel as if your route to success is being blocked. Everything at work seems to be out of control, yet you aren’t comfortable expressing your feelings. Office politics are complicated, but restrained action and clear communication prevent things from falling apart.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

Something may not go according to your plans today, even if you’re fully prepared. You carefully studied your lines and you know how to play your part, but it’s as if someone changed the plot and your lines are no longer relevant. You may even feel as if the other players have been given new scripts and no one informed you. Don’t lose control of your feelings; showing your anger will only make things worse. This is a test to see if you can let go of your personal agenda and graciously adapt to the changing scenery.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Your logical analysis is usually a source of reason, but today it just makes everything unbearable. You can see what’s wrong and, fortunately, you know how to fix it. But you’re not in control. The harder you work to stabilize the situation, the crazier it becomes. Be aware that the dynamics of a relationship may have to get shaky for a while before they are able to improve.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

This might not be the kind of pleasant day that you Libras dream about. It’s challenging to figure out exactly what is happening today, but it is apparent that loose ends defy being tied. Forget about putting everything back into balance now; you’ll only grow more aggravated if you try. Instead, concentrate on cooperating with others and you’ll make it through the day with flying colors.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Although you might like the idea of a romantic involvement, your need for self-determination is very strong now. Ironically, you won’t let someone else steer your car, even if you asked him or her to drive it. It doesn’t matter what kind of logic you apply to your current dilemma today; you still may not be able to figure out the best course of action because you are conflicted over the situation. Go ahead and do what feels right in the moment, but don’t focus on the distant destination just yet.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

The cosmic tension affects nearly everyone today, yet you Archers seem to get away with pulling a few strings of your own. You can actually help someone work through a difficult situation while others just seem to make it worse. Thankfully, your actions have a powerful impact, but you’ll be even more effective now if you refrain from pushing your needs onto anyone else. Listening with an open mind is your secret strategy.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

It may not matter today how much you have prepared for a big event. You might be better off to throw your strategy to the winds and simply start all over again. Fortunately, this is not as difficult as it sounds, for the real lesson of the day is about releasing buried tensions and re-establishing any lost integrity. Toss your battle plan if you must, but don’t negotiate away your feelings of security. Your chances for success are greater when you honor your own position.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Although it seems as if you can’t rely on anyone today, everything that’s happening is actually a projection of your own experiences. You might be feeling as if you’re stretched to a breaking point and the only solution is to stir things up even more by acting unpredictably. Don’t resist the current changes; be the initiator instead of the victim.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

An unexpected encounter might prompt you to question a long-standing belief that has come between you and someone else. You are tempted to just throw your hands up in despair and walk away from a conflict, but it’s healthier to confront your fears, instead. Your world is transforming and you may have to alter your basic assumptions about yourself. Be courageous; stepping outside of your comfort zone and embracing change is the most direct path to re-establishing the stability you desire.

Daily Horoscopes for Tuesday, July 17

There is more going on than meets the eye as intense emotions rise to the surface. We may try to put a positive spin on everything now that energetic Mars harmoniously trines buoyant Jupiter. However, a controlling Mars-Pluto square indicates that a power struggle might be unavoidable. Meanwhile, the moody Cancer Moon tempts us to suppress our emotions as she makes a series of harsh alignments. Expressing hidden anger is healthier than hiding it.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

Stopping long enough to let your emotions settle down is a great idea, even if it isn’t an easy path to follow. You could be moody today and fixing for a fight, especially if circumstances aren’t going your way. Unfortunately, you cannot find a sensible target for your aggression — and this is exactly why you should take a few deep breaths and chill out. Expressing your feelings is essential to your mental health.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

This is a wonderful day for a quick getaway, but you might not have the time to do anything about it. Still, go ahead and create small pockets of solitude for spiritual rejuvenation. Try going for a walk, sitting in meditation or practicing yoga. Give yourself enough space to listen to your own inner voice rather than the stressful demands of others.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

It’s often not easy for you to relax and today you may be dealing with even more stress than usual. Fortunately, you correctly sense that things are changing, but it won’t be an overnight turnaround. You might feel as if others will be in your way for a while. In the meantime, don’t vent your frustrations on innocent bystanders or ignore the situations that trigger your resentment. Create a middle path and try to stay on it.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

Although you may feel the upbeat energy today, annoying distractions prevent you from being as positive as you like. Perhaps someone is being more demanding than normal. You might even be drawn into an argument with others who are already fighting amongst themselves to see who is king of the hill. Ironically, you could make the best leader of all if you’re willing to stand up and fight for your beliefs.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

Your feelings are running through some very deep waters today and it might just make you somewhat uncomfortable if others unwittingly step into your emotional turmoil. Your confidence is shaky now, but your actions could speak a very different story as you roar your way through the day. Remember that false bravado won’t make your certainty return any sooner; it only alienates you from those who want to help. Showing your vulnerability can be a positive step toward developing greater intimacy.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Nothing will be gained by pushing the river, for the water will ultimately arrive at the sea in its own time. The same now applies to your life. Try not to push others to react faster than they can, for it won’t help your cause as you move into your next phase. Instead, be as open and flexible as possible. When others feel supported, they will be more willing to cooperate with you.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

This can be a day for intense emotional interactions as you confront the gulf between your thoughts and feelings. These conversations could even be expressed as a dialogue between two inner voices. Take a chance in a relationship and open up to another person, but avoid being too dependent on logic alone. Remember, you need both the objective and subjective sides of reality today to round out your experience.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Social interactions might bring up your insecurities, adding more drama to an already intense day. You may feel as if you are engaged in a battle that you must win, but the truth is that your fears are making the situation more problematic today. Instead of overreacting with unrestrained passion, seek ways to salve the open wounds and slow down your own emotional rollercoaster.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

You feel a boost of enthusiasm from your key planet Jupiter today, but the buzz isn’t long-lasting. There are bigger issues developing and even if you believe that you have passed through the eye of the storm, there is still more turmoil to come. You could inadvertently make a situation worse by attempting to bring an unresolved matter to a premature conclusion. It’s better to just let the energy take its own course without trying to control the outcome.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

Your feelings are much clearer now as you get a fresh perspective on the events of the past few days. But your current view of reality may be influenced by your unexpressed emotions as you struggle between the thoughts in your head and the desires of your heart. Lean on your friends for support instead of pushing them away. Trusting someone else enables you to trust yourself.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Fire up your intellect for a little bit of fun and break out of old routines wherever you go. Enjoy the show as you actively engage everyone in intense conversations to gain perspective on your own feelings. However, avoid negotiations that require detached analysis today, as it will be difficult to separate your logical thoughts from your irrational needs now.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

You are highly enthused and could even be passionate enough today to take a risk in a conversation or email exchange with someone you want to know better. Listen to your heart, even if you hear your fears trying to talk you out of expressing your desires. Just remember to give others enough latitude so they can be comfortable to share whatever they feel, too.

Your Daily Horoscopes for Monday, July 16

We’re able to see a situation from two different perspectives today as the dualistic Gemini Moon mixes optimism with pessimism. The pressure for change continues to build and it appears as if things cannot go on in the same old way. Excitement mounts along with fear of the unknown. Even the Moon’s shift into cautious Cancer at 8:31 pm EDT won’t prevent us from feeling the energetic rush from tomorrow morning’s exuberant Mars-Jupiter trine.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

You are marching to the beat of your own drum and the rhythm is so strong today that you cannot resist following it. Exhibiting a bit of self-restraint is usually a good idea, but there’s no holding you back now. Although you want to be practical, you still could overextend your energy as your key planet Mars is magnified by expansive Jupiter. Nevertheless, you can improve your chances for success by concentrating on your goals. Eliminating unnecessary activities flips the odds in your favor.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

You feel uneasy as everything starts to move faster today. It’s apparent how your actions set the stage for what will happen, but there is so much heading your way now that it’s challenging to settle down and make progress. Your prospects may be improving, but this is no time to abandon your responsibilities. The rewards that are waiting around the corner will likely vanish before you reach them if you fall short of what’s expected of you.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Your positive attitude attracts opportunities, but you must be careful to balance your optimism with more practical considerations. Although you can tell that there is great potential for enjoyment now, this isn’t all about fun and games. Ultimately, it’s up to you to share yourself with those who are closest to you. You have a chance to do something meaningful that enriches your spirit today; including your friends makes it more special.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

You might become so enthusiastic today that you break through your inhibitions and explode onto the scene with a few exciting ideas of your own. This is not your typical approach, so your spontaneous behavior could catch others off guard. If you feel compelled to risk exposure and take a chance, go for it. You can always clam up again later if you overextended your reach.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

When the going gets tough you Lions bounce back, and today the planets are on your side, giving you an extra jolt of energy. It’s wonderful to have enough zest to get up and go, but it’s not wise to swing into action now just to avoid a difficult situation. Nevertheless, you still might feel heroic from all the potential around you, but if you inflate things too much, reality will likely disappoint you.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

You are feeling hopeful today, yet something seems to be on your mind, preventing you from riding your own waves of enthusiasm. Your conservative tendencies are holding you back, yet you still think that you can accomplish something special now if you just go out and give it your very best. Thankfully, you have an excellent grasp of the situation and your chances for success are really very good.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

You tend to be a people person since you flourish from your interactions with others. Your discussions with someone else help you see yourself more clearly. The feedback you receive now deepens your perspective if you can be receptive to hearing it. Another point of view increases your current choices, so take time to integrate what you learn before making an important decision.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

You are so realistic you probably realize that your current enthusiasm won’t last. But you’re also clever enough to make the most of it while you can. There is recognition coming your way for a job well done. Although a bit of positive reinforcement won’t likely change the overall direction of your life, you can still have something to feel good about along the way.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

You’re the central character in your very own mythical story. You have morphed into a superhero with larger-than-life intentions because your key planet Jupiter is receiving an adrenaline rush from red-hot Mars. Utilize this cosmic boost by throwing a great party or rushing in to save the day for a friend. The choice is entirely yours.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

Your sensible self-restraint is sufficient to get you through periods of weakness, but now you might not have enough resistance to keep everything to yourself. You’re overcome by an impulse to share your private feelings today. If you have been suppressing anger or resenting someone close to you, get it out in the open while you can. Potential difficulties will not last long once they are discussed; it’s keeping them secret that creates the most trouble.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

If you are keeping more to yourself than usual, reality may kick up a storm today. Your good intentions will come around quickly if you initiate meaningful communication instead of wasting time talking about trivialities. You might not even realize how influential your own values are or what you bring to a situation, but others appreciate your openness. Let your friends see your vulnerability; they can help you in ways you cannot yet realize.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

You have a growing sense of confidence that motivates you into high gear today, but you’re probably more grounded now than you seem. You have been thinking about your next move for a while, but your excitement overshadows any previous planning. Others may think you are out of control now, but don’t worry about surprising anyone else. Just do what makes the most sense to you in the present moment.

Your Love Horoscopes for the Week of July 16

Relationships could be all over the place this week as warrior Mars in diplomatic Libra is rocked with enthusiasm on Monday and Tuesday, before mistrust and suspicion sneak in to steal the show. A desire to flee difficult challenges or embrace new experiences is likely as shocking Uranus and provocative Pluto crank up the energy prior to the late night hypersensitive Cancer New Moon. Thankfully, sobering planetary influences start to cool off the emotional drama by Saturday morning as we seek calmer companionship and quieter times under a thoughtful Virgo Moon.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

Your emotions could run to extremes this week with your passionate planet Mars triggering rapid changes of mood. But if you can ride out the storm, you might land in a happier place that surprises you with a newfound sense of freedom and excitement. Just note that sticking to your commitments is likely to be the key to harmony this weekend when little acts of consideration earn you trust and affection.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

There’s some magic waiting to happen this weekend with the earthy Virgo Moon’s presence in your 5th House of Romance on Saturday and Sunday. The key to finding romance is to stretch your usual social boundaries, express yourself more openly and explore how to play the game of love in different ways. Maintaining your sense of humor makes it possible for you to try new things without the fear of looking foolish.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Healthy relationships rely on open communication, but it’s especially important to be thoughtful about what you say this week. A desire to express yourself more honestly is fine if you are sensitive as to how your message will be received. It’s wiser to avoid delicate subjects now unless you’re sure that the situation truly calls for it. Keeping your thoughts to yourself or engaging in light chatter is preferable to revealing too much and inadvertently hurting someone’s feelings in the process.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

A New Moon in your nurturing sign on Wednesday night intensifies your feelings and increases your commitment to take charge of your personal life. Negotiations are necessary and patience is required to iron out the important details essential for making a partnership work. The weekend is excellent for doing some rational thinking that helps you discuss emotional issues in a clear-headed manner.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

Memories of love gained and lost may well up from the past with the sentimental Cancer New Moon falling in your reflective 12th house in the middle of the week. It’s appropriate to review previous relationship experiences before you get a fresh wave of energy when the Sun enters your colorful sign on Sunday. Finishing off old business clears the decks, making it possible to move your life in a more fulfilling direction.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

The Moon’s presence in your sign this weekend encourages you to wear your heart on your sleeve and others can’t help but notice. Yet you may be overly sensitive on Saturday afternoon when dreamy Neptune washes away logic with an overdose of emotion or a taste for fantasy. This won’t be a problem if you’re enjoying the company of a tender person or engaging in an inspiring activity. Just don’t leave common sense behind in your hunger for intimacy.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

Passionate Mars in your sign gives you more drive and the ability to take the lead in relationships. A push from optimistic Jupiter starts Tuesday with enthusiasm, but Mars’ tough aspects to disruptive Uranus later that day and to provocative Pluto on Wednesday can spur surprises and trigger conflict. Don’t let a crisis of the moment turn into a major war unless you’re ready to tear your relationship life apart so you can build a new one.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Your feisty ruling planet Mars is kicking up a storm this week, provoking sudden bursts of energy and unexpected behavior. Your reactions could be out of proportion to the events that trigger them, so keep a check on feelings and avoid impulsive actions. On the plus side, you might be motivated to change your attitude about love and adjust your expectations about relationships. Take notes, learn, and ponder before making a major move.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Sensitivity in your relationships becomes a major issue with the tender Cancer New Moon falling in your 8th House of Deep Sharing. This is a gentle cosmic reminder that intimacy blossoms when you feel safe and secure. Showing that you care and expecting the same of others comes from growing more at ease in vulnerable situations. It’s possible to express your needs without appearing needy, making you even more endearing to others.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

Relationships take an emotional turn now with a mid-week Cancer New Moon landing in your 7th House of Partners. Feelings are more important than logic in this delicate environment, so don’t let your head get in the way of your heart. There’s a place for reason, but not when it comes before responding to the needs of the one you love. By the same token, you also can benefit from some emotional support and a little tender, loving care.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Your urge for independence could explode with impulsive behavior on Wednesday. Irrepressible Mars opposes your spontaneous ruling planet Uranus to shake up and wake up your personal life. You should be ready to break your patterns and move in a new direction so that you can start exploring fresh forms of fun. It’s helpful, though, to give yourself a chance to experiment for a while instead of making any major decisions too soon.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

The caring Cancer New Moon on Wednesday night sets your heart sailing on hopeful waters. Saturday could turn out to be magical with an afternoon opposition of the Moon to your inspiring planet Neptune, dissolving barriers with others. While a profound, maybe even spiritual, connection is a potential reward, there’s also a risk of projecting your fantasies on the wrong person. What you see and feel may not be what you get unless you add a small dose of logic to the mix.

Daily Horoscopes for July 15

Complexity and subtlety are blended into a conundrum today. The whimsical Gemini Moon reflects our need to keep everything light and easy. However, an early morning Sun-Saturn square heightens resistance, asking us to slow down or even stop making any more progress. Obstacles appear in front of us, although we may put them there ourselves. It’s difficult to strike a perfect balance between our serious feelings and more lighthearted ones.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

You always have choices as you approach an unexpected roadblock in your path. You can run directly into the trouble and try to power your way through it. When this headstrong tactic works, you are a sight to behold! But today an impulsive attack could be foolhardy and frustrating. Stop and try to understand what you can learn from the situation. When you recognize the deeper lesson, everything will quickly fall into place.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

Whatever feelings rise to the surface now are doing so for a good reason; however, the logic may not be immediately apparent to you. Remain open to changes even if you feel like you’re not getting what you want. The situation might still be unstable and you’re wise to wait before making any significant decisions. Instead of focusing on a temporary setback today, remember that what you say has the magical power to transform everything in the blink of an eye.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Your key planet Mercury is retrograde now, turning your thoughts inward. Although responsibilities may seem somewhat oppressive, almost anything is possible if you put your mind to it. The feelings that are holding you back also contain the seeds for your forward movement. It’s not time to accept defeat, even if you’re feeling less than confident. Today’s discussions can set the stage for tomorrow’s transformations.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

You may think that someone is being overly judgmental of your activities as critical Saturn rains on your parade. However, today’s Sun-Saturn square gives you an opportunity to gain clarity about an important life lesson. Try to remain optimistic about your options because a challenge or a delay doesn’t mean you should give up. Instead, strengthen your position by reviewing your plans and making necessary adjustments.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

You are being tested today, and how you respond will have important consequences in the days ahead. Imagine that the complex situations that you encounter are speed bumps on the road of life. If you are moving ahead too fast, they might cause serious damage. But trouble can be averted if you see the obstacles far enough in advance. Take your cues from the feedback that reality is offering you and plan your course accordingly.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Although you feel like throwing caution to the wind today, a friend will have enough sense to remind you about your priorities. Even if some things are not going exactly the way you want, you can make choices that will keep you on your chosen path. Flexibility is more important now than sustainability. If you conjure up the image in your mind, then it has the chance to become real. Believing is the first step to seeing.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

Nearly everything in your life seems to be moving along quite well. Nevertheless, you are still facing conflict about what you want to do versus what others want you to do. Or, perhaps, someone close to you is causing you stress because they are acting recklessly instead of fulfilling their responsibilities. Whatever problems you are facing now, remember that your ability to roll with the situation will help see you through it.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Your mind continues to be very probing and, fortunately, your thinking process is grounded. However, your basic material needs and sensual desires may be the source of a dilemma. Your gut instinct encourages you to develop your vision of an ideal future. First, you must make some adjustments as your values transform along with the current circumstances. But it’s not the right time to change everything all at once. Fine-tuning your daily routine, though, is certainly in order.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Love is in the air today but it doesn’t come without complications. Although you may not be able to avoid serious matters in a relationship, you’re tempted to step around a potential problem to get to the good stuff. Unfortunately, taking a shortcut now won’t save any time and could also destabilize a romance. Instead of pushing your luck, adopting a slower approach increases your chances to find mutual satisfaction.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

You would be wise to examine your weaknesses as the willful Sun squares your key planet Saturn today. However, judging yourself too harshly could do more harm than good, especially if others are criticizing your efforts, too. Nevertheless, dwelling on your shortcomings is a waste of time. Think of yourself as a work in progress and get busy.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Ironically, the sooner you accept the current limitations, the easier it will be to break free from the restraints. The lesson now is to work within your boundaries, rather than trying to work around them. There are times to push the edges of the envelope, and there are times to exercise self-control to keep things as they are. Thankfully, the problems you face today will seem less complicated tomorrow.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

You Fish like to swim in the open waters where there are no boundaries. But now you are being presented with a restrictive situation that prevents you from reaching your destination. Instead of worrying too much about getting lost along the way, consider your current responsibilities. Once you have your priorities in order it will be easier to work within the defined limits of the game.

Your Daily Horoscopes for Saturday, July 14

Although everything might seem in order, we need to pay close attention to details today as mischievous Mercury begins its 3-week retrograde phase. Fortunately, Mercury’s supportive sextile to sweet Venus helps to gloss over the rough spots. The Moon’s shift into interactive Gemini at 8:26 am EDT adds more noise to the day. Meanwhile, a late night Sun-Saturn square reminds us that instant karma will get us if we wander too far off course.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

You are often on to the next activity before you are even finished with the current one. However, you understand the advantage of slowing down today and you’re willing to see a job through to the end. Nevertheless, growing bored can still be a problem now if things aren’t moving along quickly enough for you. Accept delays as part of the process and stick with the task at hand, even if you would prefer to be doing something new.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

You are in touch with your own strength of purpose today and are certain you can overcome any setbacks that arise. However, feeling confident isn’t enough; you must reconsider your basic assumptions even if it means going back to the beginning. Starting a project over allows you to build a more solid foundation that can support whatever comes next. Do it now while you have time; if you let this opportunity pass, you may regret it later on.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

It’s difficult to hide your feelings now that the Moon is back in your sign. You might believe that it’s more efficient to keep interpersonal communication within the safe realms of rational thinking while steering clear of illogical emotions. But taking an objective approach won’t enable you to talk your way around the obstacles in your path. Slow down and review a full range of alternative strategies before choosing a course of action.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

You are lighthearted one moment and serious the next as you remember some of the profound emotional transitions that you have experienced over the last few years. You’re ready to move on, but you still may be overly sensitive to your recent past with unresolved feelings weighing heavily on your mind. Revisiting childhood memories helps you to reframe your own history so you can do something brilliant in the current moment.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

You could run into a few snags today. A recent disappointment might seem like it’s a big deal, but Mercury retrograde in your sign tells a slightly different story. You are being given time to review the details of what led you to the present moment. This isn’t time for rest, so examine how the current blockages are symbolic of your own feelings. Awareness is the key; once you understand your role in creating the present situation, then you can steadily push on through to the other side.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

It may seem as if the public spotlight has found you now, but you might prefer to hide from view. You are more likely just to accept the responsibilities that are heaped upon you and withdraw from others while you do your work. But if you have control issues and continue to do everything on your own, your ambitious strategy could backfire. Acknowledge that you need to be a part of a larger group, tribe or family. It really does take a village.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

You are experiencing an unusual mixture of Saturn’s hard, cold reality and the whimsical fantasies of today’s breezy Gemini Moon. You’re very serious about your philosophy on life and might have to make choices now that put you in an emotionally vulnerable position. There’s nothing wrong with having lots of acquaintances in your life. Just don’t let your limited thinking get in the way of transforming a casual friendship into something more meaningful.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

You can feel the weight of responsibility on your shoulders now as you take on more than is required. It helps to examine what your past has to do with your current eagerness to help others, even if they haven’t asked for it. Compassion is surely a gift, but codependence is not a viable path to happiness. Heal others by first forgiving and healing yourself.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Stand up and stretch your wings; it’s time to claim your power. However, if you find yourself involved in a simple struggle for control, step back and take responsibility only for what is yours. You really don’t have to win an argument, since the price can be too great. Turn the challenge into an opportunity to learn something about yourself as you handle the resistance with courage and grace.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

The weekend brings relaxation for some people, but not so much for you. You are a worker bee today and there are just too many things to do around your hive. It may even feel like a day of judgment and, naturally, you want it to be called in your favor. Apply yourself diligently, but avoid any self-criticism. Continue to work as hard as you can while remembering that you’re in it for the long haul. Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

You might believe that your relationship life is improving, but you’re still afraid of crashing into a wall. Try not to get too discouraged if you have to deal with a miscommunication. A misunderstanding with a loved one can gobble up valuable time if you take it as a sign of defeat. But you should be able to accomplish what’s necessary once you realize that the current events are clues about the work you have yet to do.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

It’s time to cool off this weekend and re-evaluate what you want from your closest relationships. You may be more analytical than usual and less emotionally attached to the outcome. It’s not that you are ready to give up; it’s just that you can see the futility of trying to control someone else’s feelings. Set priorities and give yourself extra time to accomplish your current goals.

Your Daily Horoscopes for Friday, July 13th

It feels as if the weekend has arrived early because we may not be very productive today with the Moon in bucolic Taurus. However, we will be happier if we finish what we’ve already started, freeing us up to enjoy ourselves tomorrow. The Moon’s cooperative sextile to the Sun motivates us to create an agenda and stick to it. Nevertheless, an expansive Sun-Jupiter alignment widens our horizons and tempts us with plenty of possibilities.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

You are eager to get to work today; you know what must be done and you are ready to do it. You have a growing sense of what’s important — beyond your simple list of chores. But you start to think about all the alternatives and what you could be doing if you were truly free. Talking about what your heart wants could be therapeutic now as long as you can skip over what your head thinks. Just finish your work before your run off in other directions.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

You remember what it’s like to feel completely at home with who you are now that the mood-setting Moon is back in your sign. Although there may be big changes you would like to make in your life, a smarter strategy is to be content just being yourself. Concentrate on your job today, but also take the time to do something to make your home look nicer like buying yourself some flowers. Adding a little color to your life is an easy way to be kind to yourself.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Secrets have a sneaky way of seeping into separate parts of our lives where they can cause mischief. But rather than needing to talk about your sensitive topics, it’s the other people in your world that seem to be holding their cards very close. Someone may not be telling you everything he or she knows, and this might cause a rift between you. If you think that you’re missing a piece of information, ask questions first before assuming the worst.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

You might get away with resting on your laurels or, perhaps, you’re able to finish your work now with less effort than normal. However, be aware that what you are doing on the outside is not where the real action is. Instead, create magic within your imagination that you can later manifest as reality. Make a wish without worrying about the details and destiny take its course.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

You seem to be stuck between the proverbial rock and a hard place today. You may even attempt to dig in your heels and make a strong stand for something that you believe in. Unfortunately, your extreme stubbornness won’t necessarily help you make your point. Don’t compromise your beliefs, but be prepared to negotiate about your actions.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

You have an opportunity to do some deep psychological work that alters your attitude in a profound way. Ironically, delving into parts of your psyche can suddenly shift the way you think. It may be difficult to start this emotional process, but rewards are likely if you take the necessary steps toward self-discovery.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

It may feel as if your values are floating in space right now. This doesn’t mean that you are confused about your personal beliefs. Instead, it’s as if you cannot easily integrate your likes and dislikes into your current set of circumstances. The good news is that you are doing some deep thinking about what you want, which ultimately can lead to greater fulfillment.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Sometimes you wish you didn’t know so much and feel so much. Nevertheless, you do; having a deeper awareness of things that other people miss is one of your gifts. Unfortunately, it’s not easy to shut off your senses and close down your brain when your emotions become overwhelming. It’s better to be fully conscious of your inner process than to be in denial. Ultimately, you have more choices available when you are in touch with an expanded view of reality.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Although your week finishes up slowly, the weekend ahead should prove to be quite exciting. You’re on the edge of a major intellectual adventure and you would be wise to prepare for it now. Your thoughts are expanding as you discover new ways to look at your life. Travel is indicated, but remember that you can also go on a mental journey within the realms of your imagination.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

You are rediscovering the ground beneath your feet today. You might have pulled away from your own center recently and the continuous distractions have caused you stress. However, now you find comfort in feeling the earth again. Your solid pragmatism works in your favor as long as you to maintain integrity by following through on your good intentions.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

You might be experiencing emotional extremes today; your nerves are rattled by circumstances in your life that you cannot control. You are currently engaged in a life lesson about acceptance, not that long-term change is impossible. It’s just that you must step beyond your feelings of personal discontent in order to touch a much deeper meaning of what’s going on. Once you’re aware of the bigger picture, the details will be easier to manage.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Whatever complications have been plaguing you, they finally seem to be more manageable today. It’s not that the complexity has gone away; it’s just that you feel better equipped to handle whatever happens now. Although your feelings are quieter, they are still running deeply. Allow yourself to feel good about the options in front of you without the pressure of having to make big decisions right away.

Your Lunar Love Horoscopes for the Weekend of July 13 – 15

Weekend Love: Lunar Love

by Jeff Jawer

Pursuing Pleasure

July 13 – 15

Expect surprises this weekend with shocking Uranus turning retrograde on Friday and verbal Mercury making a similar reversal on Saturday. But life might feel relatively calm at first with the Moon’s presence in stabilizing Taurus until Saturday morning. The zodiac’s Bull is like Ferdinand: a sweet, gentle sensualist who stops to smell the flowers. Taking time to sample life’s simple pleasures is a wonderful gift of the Taurus Moon. Familiar comforts are extra tasty in this habit-bound sign.
Saturday’s cosmic energy is much sassier, starting with a lunar leap into bouncy Gemini in the morning. The chatty Twins make it easy to talk to anyone about anything. Words of love and affection flow like poetry thanks to a flirtatious Mercury-Venus connection. Yet the retrograde turn of Messenger Mercury and a stern Sun-Saturn square provoke careless speech that can put a chill on relationships. Tempering high hopes and avoiding grandiose promises are ways to escape a sudden cooling trend.
Being patient with personal demands pays dividends on Sunday morning with a lunar conjunction to amorous Venus. There’s romance in the air; get up early to make a special breakfast for the one you love or head out into the world to see who might catch your eye. A friendly attitude and a playful approach are nearly impossible to resist.

the daily humorscopes for friday, july 13

the daily humorscope

Friday, July 13, 2012

Aries

(March 21 – April 19)

You will find solace, and it won’t look at all like you expected.

Taurus

(April 20 – May 20)

Beware of Poles. Particularly dark-haired women of Polish extraction. Due to an oddity of genetic significance, they will all be intensely silly for a few weeks.

Gemini

(May 21 – June 20)

Good day to start learning the violin. Interestingly, your neighbors will volunteer to pay for lessons. It’s selfless gestures like that which really help friendships blossom.

Cancer

(June 21 – July 22)

Today you will be seized with the urgent desire to buy a harmonica, which you will take everywhere with you, on one of those coat-hanger thingies around your neck.

Leo

(July 23 – August 22)

You might have that mole on your back checked out. It may actually be a gopher.

Virgo

(August 23 – September 22)

You will be in a somewhat ornery mood when you go out to an Italian restaurant tonight. You will insist on chopsticks.

Libra

(September 23 – October 22)

You will call someone today, who will insist on calling you “Sven”. Humor them — act impressed that they know your “real” name.

Scorpio

(October 23 – November 21)

You will have trouble with the telephone, in which, no matter what number you call, you reach “Mo’s Leather Emporium”. Don’t take it lightly.

Sagittarius

(November 22 – December 21)

You will join the ranks of the hipster cognoscienti. It’ll be fun at first, but later you’ll start secretly craving casseroles, and it will eventually become such an intolerable pressure that you’ll abandon your pale, pierced friends with the clever haircuts and move to Minnesota.

Capricorn

(December 22 – January 20)

Soon you will find yourself at another dull party, where the only person you know is who you came with. You’ll need to use Tip #39 of my book “101 Ways To Break The Ice”: Ask someone who they are, after introducing yourself. When they say their name, repeat it back to them as “YOU’RE Bill Smith???” “Uh, yes” “Well, you sure can’t believe everything you hear, can you?” “What do you mean?” “Well, it’s just that you don’t look at ALL like a weasel, you know? Or at least, hardly at all.”

Aquarius

(January 21 – February 18)

You will come up with a theory about people – that you can learn a lot about them, simply by removing the first letter of their name. For example, Ron -> On. That’s why I’m on-line. That also explains why Hugh acts so primitive, sometimes. And if I were you, I’d avoid Alice.

Pisces

(February 19 – March 20)

What fun! You’ll be called in to a special meeting at work soon, where someone will have a “pink slip”. Sounds like party attire to me!

Daily Horoscopes for Thursday, July 12

We can use today to take a few deep breaths and begin to integrate what has transpired over the past couple of weeks. Thankfully, the sensual Taurus Moon encourages realism over idealism. Traditionally, the Moon is quite comfortable in the sign of the Bull; she gives us enough stability to stay in touch with our changing feelings without fear of losing our center of gravity. Our unwavering determination enables us to reach our goals.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

You may get a bit lazy today because something tells you that everything is going to be OK. You know that worrying won’t help matters, even if some things are not quite right. The fact is that there aren’t any quick fixes to life’s current intriguing dilemmas, so let yourself off the hook for now. There is nothing you must do except be fully present in the moment. The rest will follow.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

This is an opportune time to recharge your batteries now that the Moon is back in your sign. Even if you are busy fulfilling your commitments, find small pockets of time to do absolutely nothing at all. Giving yourself permission to contemplate life without the need to be productive is an excellent way to reconnect with what’s truly important.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Don’t let down your guard today or you could find yourself an unwitting participant in someone else’s drama. Sure, you may have a role to play in what’s going down, but it’s time to step back from the action or you’ll get pulled into something that’s bigger than what you bargained for. Instead of trying to directly affect the outcome, take a more spiritual approach to gain a better perspective on the big picture.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

By now you have probably made a choice that will carry you well in to the future. Although your plans are in an early stage of development, you can still make adjustments to them. But, on some level, the deal is done. You’ve gone through a period of serious questioning and now it’s time to concentrate on putting your ideas into action, even if you don’t see results overnight.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

You might find yourself in a situation where people seem to be relying on you more than you think is healthy. But don’t just brush everyone’s overtures aside. Instead, find the inner strength to express clearly what you can do while admitting what is beyond your reach. You don’t have to fend for anyone now but yourself, so your friends will appreciate your honesty more than your denial.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Applying your analytical skills to your future goals is a valuable exercise now. However, even if you’ve been thinking about a quick getaway or a longer vacation, don’t put off the planning since you have a rare combination of planetary help available today. Your imagination can conjure up an ideal adventure for you and someone special. However, it’s up to you to bring your dreams down to earth.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

It seems as if the storm clouds are lifting, but your positive forecast may still be a few days out. Although the emotional skies aren’t totally clear yet, you’re already seeing the welcoming patches of blue amidst the turbulence. Be patient; don’t try to push the dark clouds away. They will continue to drift off on their own accord as you learn to appreciate the rains they bring. Remember, finding the silver lining in a cloud can be its own reward.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

You feel a bit more upbeat today as you simplify your life and clarify your needs. Sometimes things seem way more complicated to you than they do to other people. Of course, others aren’t always as perceptive as you are and they do not understand what you see. Nevertheless, eliminating some of the outer noise allows you to get even better at hearing your own inner voice.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

There’s plenty to do today, and it seems as if you are finally ready to attack your assigned tasks. It’s not that you have been lazy during the first half of this week; it’s just that there is a lot going on that continues to distract you from your normal routine. Nevertheless, it’s better to keep going through the motions, even if your heart isn’t into it now. Instead of looking to do things differently, concentrate for a while on crossing things off your list.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

You can do nearly anything you put your mind toward today, since your pragmatic nature helps you create a concrete plan to accomplish your goals. Thankfully, your focus is strong and you are determined to do whatever must be done in order to meet your obligations. Although you may be tired and work-weary, if you think you can, then you can. Don’t wait for a better time; start now.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

An emotional conflict today might not be as overwhelming as your recent experiences. In fact, you may not be too concerned at all because you can approach the entire situation in an objective manner, enabling you to rationalize your feelings. Keep in mind that an intellectual orientation allows you to hide your vulnerability, preventing others from getting too close to you. Show your courage by being honest and admitting that you don’t have all the answers.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Even though your feelings can still be quite strong today, your life seems a little calmer. Somehow, you seem to know that you’ll end up exactly where you need to be as long as you move with the tidal flow. However, going contrary to the currents will tire you out. Resistance is futile, so save your strength for when you need it most.

the daily humorscopes for thursday, july 12

the daily humorscopes

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Aries

(March 21 – April 19)

A tomato features in todays cuisine. Sadly, that’s going to be your pinacle of excitement for today.

Taurus

(April 20 – May 20)

Excellent day to crouch behind furniture, and peer over the top. If you can do that while wearing one of those Groucho Marx noses, so much the better.

Gemini

(May 21 – June 20)

Excellent day to study gastroenterology, or possibly to go bowling.

Cancer

(June 21 – July 22)

Today you will receive a gift horse. Unfortunately, it will have a really horrendous case of gingivitis.

Leo

(July 23 – August 22)

You will attain your dream of having your own cooking show, but it will become tiresome when you have to battle your way past people dressed as chickens to get into the studio each day.

Virgo

(August 23 – September 22)

It’s about time you learned some more recipes dealing with zucchini. Lots and lots of zucchini. You’ll need one of those new Martha Stewart “Kitchen Shovels”, I’m afraid. The good news is, you’ll find several nice zucchini recipes in my new cookbook “Recipes For Disaster” (the sequel to “Another Fine Mess”).

Libra

(September 23 – October 22)

Despite having a brilliant mind and a lot of terrific friends, you find yourself stagnating in a quiet backwater, with financial success nowhere in sight. You will go into business for yourself, however, making frozen Piroshki based on your grandmother’s recipe, and will become rich and famous. Your grandmother will thwap you with her umbrella.

Scorpio

(October 23 – November 21)

You will get a new job, soon, in which your most important activity will be to periodically “jiggle a little thingy”. While it will pay well, this will prove to be somewhat awkward to explain at parties. Eventually you will hit on the ploy of saying you sell insurance…

Sagittarius

(November 22 – December 21)

Today, someone named “Svlad” will appear at your door, carrying a large inflatable penguin and a bag of pistachio nuts. Despite your better judgement, you will let him in.

Capricorn

(December 22 – January 20)

You will contemplate nothingness today, but somethingness will keep intruding upon your thoughts.

Aquarius

(January 21 – February 18)

You will discover an odd amulet in an old curio shop, which is made entirely of holmium and yttrium, and which strongly interferes with the normal functioning of electronics. Best not to play with things like that.

Pisces

(February 19 – March 20)

Someone will ask you for your advice. Don’t give it! Or if they insist, simply shake your head solemnly, and mutter “Much bad juju”, and refuse to clarify. They only want a scapegoat.

Daily Horoscopes for Wednesday, July 11th

Although there’s still a lot of electricity in the air today, we are subdued by the Moon’s morning opposition to restrictive Saturn. The past couple of days have been very intense with the Moon in excitable Aries, and we begin to slow down in anticipation of her shift into steady Taurus at 7:30 pm EDT. Even if we’re having trouble resisting temptation, a more sensible approach to life enables us to experience pleasure without overdoing it.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

Complex issues continue to weigh on your psyche today, even as the real world pressures appear to ease. Although you’re trying to re-establish balance between your needs and the demands of working with others, you might overstate the importance of a personal preference. Since your strong opinions could instigate an unnecessary meltdown, consider backing down from your supposedly non-negotiable position. Compromise is more stabilizing than conflict.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

Even if your intent is to come clean, it may be more difficult to put your feelings out in the open with the Moon’s presence in your 12th House of Secrets. It’s best to avoid being drawn into an intense disagreement that’s fueled by fear of the unknown. Shining your light of awareness into the shadows of consciousness is difficult at first, but grows easier when the Moon enters your dependable sign later this evening.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

You might experience a wide range of feelings that don’t have an acceptable outlet in your current social setting. However, these unexpressed emotions still have a strong influence on what’s occurring in your outer world. It may be difficult to overcome the resistance that you face, but the blockages are easier to handle once you realize that you are the real obstacle to open communication and not anyone else. Overcome your fears with clear intentions and unrelenting persistence.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

You aren’t as hesitant today about expressing your private feelings and you might not be able to stop yourself from saying what’s on your mind. This isn’t about you suddenly demanding what you want; it’s about honoring your inner voice. Don’t keep your thoughts locked up even if you’re not sure about the consequences of disclosure. Say what you must; just remember to be kind in your approach so others will be more receptive to your words.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

Try not to overcompensate for any emotional insecurity by acting more intensely than you actually feel today. Disguising your vulnerability with an inflated demonstration of passion can trick others into believing that you have more self-confidence than you really do. Find someone you trust and openly discuss your dilemma, knowing that the ensuing conversation could help you figure out your next move.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Hiding your feelings isn’t a viable option now since everyone seems to be able to read you like an open book. But even when you take the time to explain yourself in great detail, you still aren’t sure that anyone else really understands what you need. Carefully examine your motives so you don’t mislead someone in a way that could be problematic. Once you are clear about your intentions, it will be easier to communicate them to others.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

You don’t need to let anyone push you around, for you have more power than you realize. On the other hand, nothing is gained by obsessing about something that you cannot have now. It may be challenging to manage the intensity of your reactions today. Continue to practice moderating your extreme emotions and seek middle ground wherever possible.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Sexy Venus flirts with the fine line between delicious and overindulgent today as she stressfully aligns with the Moon. You aren’t in the mood to play games now, unless you believe they will lead somewhere productive. Nevertheless, you still want to do what’s right, even if you already know what you want. Be careful; make sure that everyone is on the same page before reaching a point of no return.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Logic isn’t necessarily a part of your equation today as you attempt to satisfy your desires. You may be openly communicating with a romantic partner, yet your words can also act as a smoke screen that hides feelings you don’t want to discuss. Avoid coercive tactics since they add power to what’s not being said. Bringing your emotions out into the open can minimize unnecessary confusion later on.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

Even your closest friends have a hard time understanding how deeply your feelings run today. Although you don’t often express your needs using emotionally-charged language, your heart can be just as vulnerable as anyone else’s. Something special may be in the emotional slow cooker, but it’s too soon to declare it done. Don’t hurry the process; good things come to those who wait.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Your desires could be overridden today by everyone else’s demands. Ultimately, you might decide that it’s a smarter idea to conform instead of rigidly sticking to your own plans. It may be inconvenient to stand up to others right now even if you know what you want; the time and effort required isn’t worth it. But your needs grow in strength if you try to simply ignore them. Avoid the possibility of losing your temper by letting others know your preference without being attached to the outcome.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Dancing simultaneously in multiple realities can be exciting for you today, but it also produces extra stress. You are tempted to choose one set of emotions to live by, while burying the other. However, you’re being called to do powerful inner work while still keeping up external appearances. Keeping one foot on the ground in each realm helps you face your feelings, even if you cannot fully integrate them into your current life yet.

Your Daily Horoscopes for Tuesday, July 10

We are likely to react emotionally, yet still withhold any outward display as the impulsive Aries Moon squares the passive Cancer Sun, emphasizing the difference between how we feel and what we express. We must make choices by trying to balance our enthusiasm with sensitivity. A spiritual Moon-Neptune alignment can be confusing now by tempting us with unrealistic fantasies, yet our dreams still offer rewards if we’re willing to explore them.

Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

Your air of optimism may dissipate as you think about letting others know exactly what’s on your mind. However, if you do tell all you might have a mess on your hands to clean up afterward. Discretion is important or you could needlessly hurt the feelings of someone you really like. An act of kindness is worth far more than a self-indulgent disclosure.

Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

You would like to be by yourself today, but there may be too much going on for you to completely withdraw. It appears that you cannot have it either way. If you are home alone, you can’t keep your mind off the fun things you could be doing. And if you are out with friends or family, you just want some quiet time to yourself. No matter what, don’t fall into the trap of blaming your dissatisfaction on anyone else. Make the most of where you are in the present moment without trying to be somewhere else.

Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

Your friends may be the source of a current dilemma, especially if they have one agenda and you have another. Social activities can play an important role in your weekend, but you might be bored with the agreed-upon schedule. Don’t let yourself get roped into doing anything you cannot easily escape. Establishing your boundaries up front is wiser than suffering the consequences of just going along with the crowd.

Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

Instead of being in charge of a group activity, you would rather have everyone share in the responsibilities now. You really don’t have much patience since everything seems to take longer than it should. Instead of hurrying others along, try slowing yourself down. You may be surprised at how well this unorthodox strategy works for you today.

Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

You are ready for a vacation and even if you cannot take an extended one, a quick weekend getaway should be enough to alleviate the pressure. Don’t worry if you haven’t made any plans yet. A spontaneous day trip can be just what the doctor ordered. But if you’re already booked for the day, at least pick a weekend on the calendar and start planning your great escape.

Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

A new approach in your dealings with an intimate partner or a business associate might be enough to change a difficult dynamic. But don’t expect to make gains without some sort of uncomfortable confrontation first. Once you put your feelings out on the table, others will be able to engage you on an emotional level and this can make all the difference in the world.

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

A conflict that’s been quietly brewing for several days might explode into a full-blown argument today. Although you believe that you have an airtight case, keep in mind that someone else may be thinking the same thing. Paradoxically, reality can support multiple points of view, so don’t turn this into a fight to the finish. Instead, find a way that allows both of you to be right.

Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Discovering new ways to do the same old things brightens your day with fun and excitement. But just because you have a great idea doesn’t mean you can turn it into reality. Rather than trying to take on too much and fix everything today, just make one small improvement to your routine. Proactive change has a greater positive impact than you realize.

Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Although you would like today to be a play day you have previous commitments to fulfill, making it difficult to just go off and have fun. If you do ignore your current responsibilities, you might end up feeling so guilty that you cannot enjoy yourself, anyhow. Don’t be in such a hurry to run out on your obligations. Instead, bring others into your confidence by letting them know about your desires. They may be more willing to compromise in such a way that you get some time off, anyhow.

Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

Spending some time at home today might not be as relaxing as you wish, for your day is filled with excitement no matter what you do. Instead of trying to withdraw from the action, engage it head on. By involving yourself voluntarily, you’ll end up feeling more in control. And even if you try to go off on your own, you’ll still get pulled into the day’s events. Letting go of control allows you to enjoy yourself more than you could imagine.

Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Your day can feel like one personal crisis after another if you attempt to spend it in solitude, because others will likely be more involved with your business than you wish. Even if you are left alone, you probably won’t be able to completely relax since you have work to do. Although you believe you know what’s best, be flexible and let your friends influence your plans. Expect the unexpected and enjoy the ride.

Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Retail therapy might make you feel better today, but this is merely masking a symptom of a deeper issue. Your values are changing and you are eager to surround yourself with material objects that reflect your new outlook on life. Go ahead and honor your impulse to spend money, but avoid buyer’s remorse by making sure that your purchase is also practical.

Daily Feng Shui Tip for July 8 – Ring that Bell!

Today let’s talk about how ringing a bell can get everyone’s attention, whether they can hear it or not. Feng Shui says that you can reap rewards and improve upon your good reputation by using a sound generator. Any sound creating device will work, but Feng Shui maintains that keeping a bell in your desk’s Creativity area and ringing it nine times a day will help more people hear about you, whether or not they can hear the bell. As you ring you should also visualize a wave of positive publicity and word of mouth boosting your creativity, bringing solutions and hitting all the right career notes!

By Ellen Whitehurst for Astrology.com

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