A Little Humor For Your Day – ’21 Reasons Why Chocolate is Better Than Sex, lol!’

Twenty Reasons Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex

1) You can GET chocolate.

2) Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.

3) You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.

4) You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to.

5) You can have chocolate even in front of your mother.

6) If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won’t mind.

7) The word “commitment” doesn’t scare off chocolate.

8) You can have chocolate on top of your workbench/desk during working hours without upsetting your co-workers.

10) You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped.

11) You don’t get hairs in your mouth with chocolate.

14) With chocolate there’s no need to fake it.

15) Chocolate doesn’t make you pregnant.

16) You can have chocolate at anytime of the month.

17) Good chocolate is easy to find.

18) You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle.

19) You are never too young or too old for chocolate.

20) When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbors awake.

21) With chocolate size doesn’t matter.

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A Little Humor for Your Day – ‘Just Unearthed, THE Chocolate Files’

Chocolate File

… Any religion that rejects chocolate worships a false god.
… Chocoholic:  Blood Type M&M Positive!
… Chocolate, champagne, a large waterbed, and thou…
… Chocolate cures all.
… Chocolate is self-consecrating.
… Chocolate is serious business!
… Chocolate not found: (C)ry (W)himper (D)espair?
… Dark chocolate at the North; milk chocolate at the West!
… I love a woman with chocolate on her breath.
… I have a chocolate chip in MY computer.
… It’s Saturday?  Are you alive or did they drown you in Hershey’s?
… Lead me not into temptation…unless it’s chocolate!!!
… New and Improved…Now in chocolate and leather flavors.
… No no no, chocolate goes in the East.  Massage oil goes in the West!
… Only one thing can top good sex:  Chocolate sauce.
… Philosophy is just a set of rules for people without chocolate!
… Rule 5: Everyone must buy the moderator chocolate.
… Take with sufficient quantity of chocolate.
… This is your brain. THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON CHOCOLATE!
… Unless it affects the price of chocolate, it has no bearing on my life.
… Upload some chocolate and nobody gets hurt!
… What’s my blood type?  …Hershey’s!
… Wrappers are futile.  Chocolate will be assimilated.

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Daily Feng Shui Tip for Dec. 16th – ‘National Chocolate Covered Anything Day’

Today’s ‘National Chocolate Covered Anything Day’ is really sweet. This is a also magically delicious day since chocolate was once called ‘the food of the gods.’ Cacao beans were used among Mesoamericans as money and were traded for everything from food to medicine. And there is more magical lore that says that chocolate foods in any form can increase our own ability to give and receive both money and love. So now it makes sense why this sweet stuff has been called the ‘food of the gods. A combination of money, chocolate and love sounds like a little slice of heaven to me!

By Ellen Whitehurst for Astrology.com