A Little Humor for Your Day: Phrases You Wish You Could Say At Work

Phrases You Wish You Could Say At Work


  1. If you got payed a nickel for every stupid idea you had, you’d be a millionare.
  2. Just when I thought you couldn’t say anything dumber, you keep talking!
  3. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
  4. It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I’m really quite busy.
  5. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
  6. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
  7. And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be…?
  8. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
  9. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
  10. Can I trade this job for what’s behind door #1?
  11. Chaos, panic, and disorder: my work here is done.
  12. Do I look like a people person?
  13. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
  14. How about never? Is never good for you?
  15. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

 

–Turok’s Cabana

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Daily Planet Tracker for April 7: Moon in Taurus

The Moon in Taurus: Practical, Devoted, and Steady

Apr 6, 2019 – Apr 8, 2019

 

Before we go into the Moon in Taurus, let’s just talk about the Moon for a moment. The Moon is the fastest moving heavenly body in the sky. Because it moves so quickly, the Moon spends a little over 2 days in each zodiac sign every month!

It doesn’t matter where your Moon sign is because for a couple of days a month we all feel the influence of a Taurus Moon. When the Moon is in Taurus, there’s a dedication to getting what we want, as Taurus is oriented toward filling our needs directly. If there have been things you’ve longed for, there’s no better time to make them happen than a Taurus Moon.

Taurus is uncomplicated, and just want its senses satiated. A Taurus Moon gives us the desire for a full belly, a feeling of security, to know that there’s money in the bank. Maybe some of these things are things that we always want, but while the Moon is in Taurus, we’re more drawn toward getting them. These are the things that will make us feel good in the moment.

You might be feeling a desire for more comfort and security now. Indulge in the sheer pleasure of being here, adored by gravity, Earth’s invisible embrace. Enjoy your weight. Roll in a newly mowed lawn. Celebrate your voice: shout, sing, or whisper in somebody’s ear. Then drink a soothing tea for the thyroid and throat. Yes, Taurus is goal-oriented, but it’s also concerned with achieving a harmonious balance.

Be careful — the Taurus Moon makes it easy to feel stubborn. But in a changing world, such strength can sometimes defeat itself. Don’t try to move immovable objects.

New Moon in Taurus

The New Moon in Taurus happens once a year in mid-spring when the Sun is in the sign of Taurus. New Moons are always about beginnings, a time when things take root, and a Taurus New Moon is especially focused on doing things that are real. It’s about making something happen that has substance to it. It’s a great time to go out into the garden to plant seeds, or anything else that has a tangible element to it.

Full Moon in Taurus

The Full Moon in Taurus occurs when the Sun is in Scorpio, around mid-autumn. The Sun in Scorpio is intricate, while the Moon in Taurus is simplistic. This creates a great counterbalance in energy, taking out the complicated and mysteries energies that are at play during this time. A Taurus Full Moon is a great reminder that by paying attention to our senses — what we can touch, taste, smell, and feel — we can ground ourselves and make life simple again.

 

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Your Daily Rune & Witches Rune for April 7th

The Daily Rune for Today

Ehwaz

 

“The mind will trust the body, the body will trust the mind.”

Ehwaz – “eh-was” – Literally: “Horse” – Esoteric: Trust

Rune of harmonious teamwork and trust. Rune of pairs of entities working together for a common goal.

Psi: trust between individual entities, sexuality

Energy: trust, cooperation, the Fetch

Mundane: animals, teamwork, friendship

Divinations: Harmony, teamwork, trust, marriage, loyalty, a friend; or duplication, disharmony, mistrust, betrayal, nightmares, indecision, an enemy.

Governs:

Activating the energies of your inner Fetch
Ability to detect deceit and uncover subtle queues
Facilitates swiftness in every regard
Establishing trust and bonds with animals (ie. horse whisperers)

 

Your Daily Witches Rune for Today

The Blank Rune

Meaning: This is a rune of difficulty and negative influences will rule your life for a time, but as all difficulties are a learning experience it will lead to improved personal perspective and progress on your life’s path. Always consult the surrounding runes with this stone. If it lies with a positive stone, it indicates that the pain of this experience will lead to a beneficial change in circumstances.

Your Daily Tarot Cards for Sunday, April 7th

Your Daily Tarot Card for Today

Strength

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Keywords: inner strength, vision, self control!

Astrological Correspondence: Leo

The Strength card, depicting a gracious queen-like figure and a wild lion, shows that real strength has to be combined with graciousness and gentleness to become a force. It symbolizes inner strength, determination to overcome obstacles, self-knowledge and self-discipline, as only when we know ourselves and act in a responsible manner will we be able to deal with challenging situations and overcome difficulties successfully. Yet this card not only represents physical strength; moral and emotional strength are also included in the meaning. Patience, compassion, dealing with frustration, accepting of others, and tolerating imperfection (in oneself and in others) all leads to being a complete person. The negative qualities of Strength include misuse of power, aggressiveness, and intolerance.

 

 

Your Daily Tarot Love Card for Today

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Lovers

Someone is withholding affection. You know it. You see it because it is visible. And, of course, you feel it because it creates tension when you are together. Today, you need to communicate. Ask questions and get answers. You could find a fear of rejection is the culprit. Now is the time to clear the air and allow a vulnerable person to go forward in the future rather than stay in the past.

 

 

Your Daily Tarot Power Card for Today

 

The Tower

There is an unstable foundation that threatens to destroy everything you’ve worked so hard to achieve. When this card shows up in a relationship reading, it means you have to go back to basics to slowly build trust and stability before taking things to the next level. When related to finances, this means you should hedge your bets by making sure you’re aware of other opportunities out there. Operate under a sense of extreme caution to avoid nasty surprises.

 

Your Past Lives Tarot Card for Today

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Chariot

Choosing the Egyptian ruler card represents the presence of one of the pharaohs in your life. The Egyptian pharaohs dedicated their lives to reincarnating from the dead into a living and worthy vessel. Their presence ties you directly to the mystical, because the Egyptians believed that reality was just a reflection of a metaphysical journey through the paradise of the departed. The pharaoh is the living bridge between the two worlds and when one is with you, you are blessed to bring heaven to Earth.

Get A Jump on Tomorrow, Your Horoscopes for Monday, April 8

Moon Alert

Caution: Avoid shopping or big decisions from 4 AM to 5:30 PM EDT today (1 AM to 2:30 PM PDT). After that, the Moon moves from Taurus into Gemini.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Please note the restrictions of the Moon Alert (see above) today because your focus is on financial matters. A Moon Alert is a poor time for financial decisions or for spending money on anything other than food, gas and entertainment. Be mindful of this.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

Today the Moon is in your sign for a good part of the day, and while this is happening, there is a Moon Alert taking place. This is why you might feel loosey-goosey and indecisive. However, it’s an excellent time to socialize and be creative.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Don’t go off half-cocked today, which might be easy to do because fiery Mars is in your sign, revving your engines and stirring you to be proactive and Johnny on the spot! Meanwhile, most of this day is a Moon Alert, which is a bad time to make important decisions or spend money. Stay chill.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

Today you might be focused on dealing with friends or groups; furthermore, you might be involved in setting goals. Do be aware that most of this day is a Moon Alert (see above), which means it’s a poor time to make decisions. But it’s a great time to socialize!

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

During today’s Moon Alert (see above) do not volunteer for anything or agree to anything important when talking to parents and bosses. Keep your head down and your powder dry. Write down your creative ideas and run them up the flagpole tomorrow.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

It’s Monday. Mars is high in your chart arousing your ambition. Today you are focused on shared property, taxes and debt. However, most of this day is a Moon Alert, which means you should avoid important decisions in financial matters. Heads up!

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Today you need to be aware of the restrictions of the Moon Alert (see above) and confine your spending to gas, food and entertaining diversions. Postpone important decisions and major purchases until tomorrow or until after the Moon Alert is over.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Your conversations with friends and partners might be vague and hard to pin down because of the Moon Alert today. Don’t agree to anything important during that time and do not volunteer for anything or make an appointment. Keep things light.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

Don’t expect top productivity at work today because the Moon Alert will erode your efficiency and introduce delays and a general sense of vagueness and indecisiveness. However, during a Moon Alert our minds can be highly creative!

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

This can be a very creative day for you, especially if you work in the arts, the entertainment world or the hospitality industry. You will also be successful if you work with children because it’s easy for you to think outside of the box. Restrict spending to food, gas and entertainment.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

This is the perfect day to play hooky from work and stay at home because most of today is a Moon Alert, which means things are loosey-goosey. The one thing that is improved during a Moon Alert is one’s creative talents. Restrict your spending to food, gas and entertaining diversions.

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

This is a loosey-goosey day due to the Moon Alert. Do not make important decisions during this time. Do not spend money on anything other than food, gas or entertainment. Once the Moon Alert is over – it’s all systems go. Be smart.

If Your Birthday Is Today

Actress Robin Wright (1966) shares your birthday today. You are idealistic, yet realistic. You think carefully before making decisions. This year you have responsibilities to family as well as yourself because service to others is important. Therefore, take care of yourself so that you are a strong resource. Nurture relationships you value. Tap into your personal creativity and hobbies. Make your home pleasing to return to.

 

–GeorgiaNichols