They have turned me loose again, thanks to Jacob. Jacob is a super sweet kid, well not kid, a young man. I should probably quit talking about him because he is turning bright red and I would imagine he feels a little odd since he is typing this. I have to say he has been terrific. He told me anytime I wanted to convey a message to you, he would type it for me. Eleanor volunteered to do the same but I am afraid she might twist my words around. Something like, “Good morning, I am going to turn all of you into zombies today!” Just kidding. I trust her completely or else she wouldn’t have access to this account.
Everyone else is out gathering up supplies because we are sitting right in the path of an ice storm. The mention of ice they all run around like chickens with their heads chopped off. Maybe it is the drugs but I ain’t really excited about it. I am just wondering how a walker would do on a sheet of black ice, lol! Don’t worry I ain’t that crazy yet. Keyword “yet!” I wouldn’t want to have to have a pin or rod placed in my rump where I fell and cracked it. That would be rough to say the least. While they are all out gathering propane, food and the such, I thought I would drop you a line and let you know, if you don’t hear from us after today, don’t worry. The ice has knocked out all the power and we are in a small house about to go stir crazy. Oh, Goddess, please no! The last ice storm we had that hit us, we were without power for 12 days. Can you imagine that? Somebody got this bright idea to get a huge propane stove, mind you it was a good idea. We could cook on it, make coffee, did about everything you imagine on it. It even heated the house. We had kerosene lamps, candles and flashlights. We were in the Cave man days and bored silly but we survived. I remember a neighbor coming over. They had just got a generator. She wanted to know if we had anything we wanted to put in her refrigerator. She was amazed I was fixing hamburger helper on the stove and sweating. She said she hadn’t had a hot meal in days, could she stay for supper. I told her of course there was enough for everybody. She thought it was nice and cozy and of course, I had been couped up with these people till I was stir crazy and thought something different, lol!
So now you know what is going on today and perhaps tomorrow if they aren’t back on the internet. Real quick, doctor’s report. That was a laugh. I believe the only reason he wanted to do a check up was to see if I still had the casts on. The last time I believe I was out of the casts within probably two or three weeks(thanks to my trusty hammer). I know, I know. I ain’t doing that this time because my leg still hurts like hell. But he did give me good news. I have a rod stuck out my middle finger on my left hand. Never seen anything like it. It is absolutely gross. I told Lady Beltane the other day, if the other fingers would go down, I could pop one heck of a bird. Might as well fine something to laugh about in this situation. But anyway back to the nasty rod, he said if everything keeps healing the way it is, the rod should be able to come out in about two weeks. I looked at him and asked him if I was going to be awake for this and he laughed and said no. The laughter scared me. That is one good sign anyway. He wanted to know if I was able to put any weight on the leg yet and I showed him. That surprised him. My leg is getting stronger every day. He told me I might have to walk with a cane for a bit after my leg came out of the cast. He said he might have been wrong and I might be able to use that leg again after all. I wanted to tell him the leg was getting better so it wouldn’t have to spend an hour a night with Eleanor but I didn’t. Eleanor hasn’t realize it yet but I am getting stronger and healing faster each day. I know when you are sick, a witch isn’t suppose to try to heal herself but….you have one entire side of your body in casts and see what you do. The minute you feel strong enough, I be damned you are going to try and try I have. I can feel my strength, power and health starting to return very quickly now. It is only a matter of time now I know that. I am a hard witch to keep down and especially try to burn alive in a house.
I still have not been back to the cabin. I have imagines of what it was like when I was propped up against the tree. The way the fire was raging, I can’t imagine anything being left. That will be my final test to actually see it. I know I have to for my own peace of mind and some closure. I have tried and tried to sense the man who did it and I can’t. Eleanor and Lord M told me to stop trying. After all this time, they finally told me the truth and I know it is the truth because like I said I can’t sense him. When they told me I don’t know what emotions I felt. There was no regret, no sorrow, no nothing, except thinking, “the bastard got what he deserved.” It still baffles me though, how can someone tell you to your face, “they are in love with you,” then try to kill you. I have had male admirers all my life but this takes the cake. I do blame myself, I let my guard down. I brushed him off, I had my mind on making the boys a home here and a life here. The man was in the way and I didn’t like that. So I just brushed him off and didn’t give him a second thought. I should have known he had a very dark side and I didn’t. I wasn’t focused on him at the time. Funny, I always tell each of you, not to let your guard down, be aware of your surroundings, shield your home, yourselves and I didn’t even take my own advice. Then again I stop to think he got me when I was at a very vulnerable state. I had just lost my very best friend and my emotions and senses were all over the place. Perhaps if not for that I could have seen and felt what kind of person he really was. But it is too late to cry over spilled milk now. Now comes the wonderful task of rebuilding my life.
Which leads me to my final thought and I promise this is it. I received so many wonderful cards from all of you. I wanted to get some thank you notes and write you back personally but apparently that won’t be happening for a while. Your words that you wrote in the cards and on paper, I could feel your emotions and your love. It was overwhelming. With each one I opened and I read, I teared up. I believe the words you wrote in those cards helped more than you will ever know. Not to mention, the ones who wrote notes in the PayPal comments. I have never felt such love and caring in my life. I can never begin to thank you enough for everything you have done. I knew I not only had to get better for myself but for each and everyone of you who cared about me and loved me. I can never, ever thank you enough, never. I have always called you my family, my brothers and my sisters. It is an honor to know that you consider me part of yours.
Got to go for now, starting to cry. Remember, my sweets, I love each and everyone of you dearly and with all my heart. Till next time,