the daily humorscope
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Someone you’ve never met will come up and nudge you today. You don’t have to stand for that, though, and you should just nudge them right back.
Good day to buy chocolate for someone you love.
Excellent day to make strange “hooting” noises, while hiding in the bushes.
Tomorrow is a good day to wear your lucky Rocketship underwear. Try not to leap into rooms while shouting “Hark!” however.
Benjamin Franklin said: “If you would like to know the value of money, go and try to borrow some.” You’re not sure this is an accurate indicator of the value of things, however. At least not after having tried to borrow a toothbrush…
Excellent time to race one of those little Shriners cars up and down the sidewalk twenty thousand million times. Also, you’ll meet an angel, but don’t let on that you know who she really is.
As a joke, you should put an 8-foot-tall mucous-covered “egg” in your friend’s basement. Then, when he or she goes down to do a load of laundry…
Not a good time to go forth and conquer. Try going fifth, and hover in the background.
That bad smell in the closet will get stronger. Time to investigate.
Beware of Doug.
You are about to have an idea of almost mind-boggling brilliance. Try to remain calm.
While poring over some old historical documents, you will discover that the Norman invasion was actually supposed to be the “Bob” invasion, but Norman stole the credit for it. Sadly, it will turn out to be too late to change it now.
Witches Of The Craft® 