You Know You’re a Redneck if…
Your yard has been proposed as a new landfill site.
Your kid’s birth announcements include the phrase “rug rat.”
Your pocket knife has ever been referred to as “Exhibit A.”
Your sister has a “Soldier of Fortune” subscription.
Your wife is sister and your daughter
You’ve ever stood in line more than 1 hour to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
Your bank checks feature pictures of dogs fighting.
You’ve ever stabbed someone’s hand while reaching for the last pork chop.
On Christmas eve, you left Santa a beer and a Slim Jim.
56: The Wanderer
A seasoned traveler knows that a special kind of decorum is called for when one ventures far from home. He or she must develop a yielding nature outwardly, so that the ‘local contact’ or host can open doors and prevent unseemly errors. But inwardly, the wanderer knows that it is sometimes impossible to discern the true intentions of strangers — are they hostile, friendly or merely opportunistic?
The twin houses of mystery and discovery rule any journey. Each new day is launched on a fresh landscape, one that reaches out to grab our full attention. Though new adventures are a great teacher — and often a great equalizer — there is an art to living lightly in a strange land. Mindfulness and discernment become the keys not only to success, but also to survival.
If you are entering a new environment of any sort attempt to be sincere, flexible and undemanding, rather than obstinate. Let go of old attitudes and habits that could encumber you, or make you overly conspicuous. The onset of a great journey is not a favorable time to enter into binding agreements, or to start new enterprises.