A Little Humor for Your Day – Tips for Halloween Survival

Tips for Halloween Survival   

    


 
        

Since there has been reports of unsafe hex going on over the last few years resulting in the loss of several viable members within the community it has been brought to my attention that there is the need to present safety tips for those of us who dare to venture beyond our own “safe” houses.

These experiences have been very well documented and put up on the silver screen for all to see. For those of you who have not paid attention to the documentation, this is the official Halloween Public Service Announcement.Take note, so each and every one of you all can have an enjoyable Holiday.


  1. Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or near a grave, tomb, crypt, mausoleum, etc.

  2. Avoid secluded mountain resorts, especially those which keep ‘Redrum’ in stock.

  3. Castles are not normally found in the American Midwest. Be wary.

  4. Never take the dare to spend a night in a haunted house.

  5. If priests won’t or can’t enter your home, start looking for a new home.

  6. If the house you’re in tells you to “GO AWAY”, do so immediately.

  7. If supernatural beings start calling your name, leave the area immediately, if not sooner.

  8. If you are alone in a house and something calls your name, leave the house immediately through whatever exit is in the opposite direction. If there is no exit, make one.

  9. If you’re searching for something which caused a noise and find out that it’s just the cat, leave the room immediately or else you will quickly die.

  10. If entering your room you put your hand in a kind of sticky/slimy/resinous kind of substance that was not there before, turn and run immediately.

  11. It is very, very dangerous to back into, or through rooms.

  12. Never put your back to or lean on a door.

  13. If a unknown creature is locked inside of a pantry, closet, etc, don’t open it.

  14. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out.

  15. Never stand in, on, above, below, beside or near a window, especially those that appear that they would break easily.

  16. If plumbing fixtures or other structures in your home begin shaking and spewing body fluids, it’s time to leave.

  17. Don’t look under the bed.

  18. If your dance partner has no reflection, chances are s/he just might be a vampire.

  19. Never take a bath or shower with a maniac/spirit/demon/creature in the house.

  20. As tempting as it is, don’t have sex until the maniac/spirit/demon/creature is dead. For some unknown reason, the maniac/spirit/demon/creature will aways be attracted to sexually active couples — at precisely the wrong time.

    • Note: Vampires like virgin blood. So this is the one and only time where the “no having sex” rule doesn’t apply. Have fun!

    • … but first make sure your partner is not a vampire.  Check in a mirror.

  21. If you’ve hidden from the maniac/spirit/demon/creature and you are not found, do not peek from or decide it’s safe to leave your hiding place. If you do decide to leave, scan the ground for twigs before you take a step.

  22. Don’t try to kill the maniac/spirit/demon/creature. Chances are good that it will never die; it’s got to be around for the sequels to kill your kids, remaining family, and/or the people you sold the house to.

  23. When it appears that you have killed the maniac/spirit/demon/creature, DO NOT check to see if he/she/it is really dead. Keep hacking at it until it is in pieces small enough not to be a threat to you.

    • Note: If you hack it into tiny pieces, you run the risk of the pieces                  regenerating. Then you’ll have a dozen of the buggers to deal with.

  24. If you’ve shot at the maniac/spirit/demon/creature, shoot it again in the head, and remember, shoot till it stops moving, and then keep shooting till you’re out of ammo. Then reload and shoot it some more. Then set it on fire and burn it up, this works with everything except demons and spirits.Then get the heck out of there!

  25. Never get into a car without first checking the back seat for occupants.

  26. If you’ve just finished running over the maniac/spirit/demon/creature in your car, keep going. Most certainly do not get out of the car under any circumstances to see if he/she/it is “really” dead.

  27. The more people the maniac/spirit/demon/creature is distracted by, the better “your” chance of escape.

  28. The more cowardly you are, the more likely you are to get eaten. Do the minimum amount to help others.

  29. When you have the benefit of numbers, never, ever, pair off, or go in alone.

  30. If demons begin possessing your companions, it’s a good idea to leave the area as soon, and as quickly as possible.

Turok’s Cabana

Advertisements

Ward Off Psychic Vampire Attacks

Ward Off Psychic Vampire Attacks

Items You Will Need:

  • 2 white candles
  • Warm sea water in a bowl
  • Incense (frankincense or myrrh are good)
  • Your favorite oil
  • Altar

The Spell:

Place the candles at the back of the altar, one on the right to represent the God, one on the left for the Goddess. Place the sea water in the centre, and the incense at the front. Light the candles and incense

Rub each candle with the oil and say :

‘ I ward off negativity in my home, work and everyday life.
No evil or negativity shall enter here.’

Picture a white light around you and as it increases to full intensity, picture it surrounding your home and work place/ school. Now say :

‘ Psychic vampires in the night
Psychic vampires who destroy my life
Destroy no more of what i achieve
Destroy no more of what i receive
Negativity is not welcome
Evil is not welcome
In me, around me or the people I love.’

Repeat this 3 times, then allow the incense and candles to burn themselves out.

Protect Yourself from Psychic Attack

 

by Christopher Penczak

The heart of magick is empowerment. Magick taps into your own personal resources and builds a bridge of harmony with the universe. Fear is the limiting factor of empowerment. Those who seal away their own magick build a wall with their fear. They fear other people’s opinions, the responsibility, danger and ultimately themselves. Fear is a weapon used by those who seek to control the power. Control mongers bombard society with messages of fear to spread their own power.

Healers, midwives and wise women were tortured and put to death during the Inquisition for using their knowledge and talents. The Church and the newly established medical profession wanted to keep their base of power, and the wise folk threatened them. Rumors of pacts with the Devil, evil witches casting curses and demons stealing children in the night were spread. The general public started to fear the wise folk, and newly developing psychics chose not to explore their gifts because of the social stigma associated with them. The lessons of the Inquisition were simple: Fear pain and death more than honoring your power. Learn to obey those in command. The higher power does not exist in you. You need others to tell you the truth. These are old lessons repeated over and over by dominating forces.

Due to present and past life associations with such propaganda, mystical explorers often fear their own power and the ability to do magick. They believe evil things are lurking about, waiting to snatch their souls. They fear being healers and teachers and do nothing, playing it safe. Unfortunately, the world needs healers and teachers, wise women and cunning men more than ever before.

Because of popular horror movies, books and Ouija boards, the world of magick is associated with the dark creatures that go bump in the night, ready to snatch us away. The good magick of fairy tales seems impotent by comparison, and as a society, we forget our ancient mythology. People with strong psychic, spiritual and magickal talents never tap these resources, fearing the worst will happen. First experiences can seem dark and mysterious, but we often encounter our own darkness and shadow selves, enabling us to make peace with them before we continue onward. I have heard many stories of “psychic attacks” from dark beings or even other practitioners, but 90 percent of the time, it is the victim’s own perceptions and fears reflected back. That is not to say there are not dark beings out there in the spiritual realms. There are, but these creatures are far less common than most people think. Fortunately, the techniques of protection work for both “real” and “self-created” attacks.

Psychic Attacks

 

Psychic attacks come in many forms. The simplest is an everyday experience. Someone says something bad about you, makes a judgment, calls you a name, yells or curses at you. The person is directing his or her energy in a harmful way toward you. If you are not strong enough in self-esteem and personal power, these little attacks take their toll.

Do not become paranoid with this information. Do not go running around accusing everyone who does not agree with you of a psychic attack. Such negativity is not meant as an attack. It is an unfortunate by-product of how our society conducts itself. This is a simple, subtle way harmful energy is directed. We all do it at times. Most often, we do it to ourselves. We judge ourselves as not worthy, not attractive, not lovable, and these images become thought forms, packets of energy, filled with a poor self-image. When people experience an “attack,” they usually are experiencing and clearing these thought forms. Be aware and responsible of your own thoughts, directed towards yourself and others.

Other thought forms and astral entities have a life of their own. You might feel a malevolent presence or voice. These are the reported demons and devils plaguing mystics. They take the form of your greatest fears. Their goal is your fear, your attention, your time and energy. They draw energy from you to feed their existence. Ignoring them is an easy way to break their hold. Laughter is even better. If you don’t take them seriously, they will lose power.

Many people believe in “psychic vampires.” They are not the blood-drinking variety from Hollywood movies or Anne Rice novels, but actual people who drain your energy. Psychic vampires are not usually occult characters, but ordinary people who drive to work every day, raise families and go to school. Usually, they are not aware of this problem. A very few are aware of their energy draining tendency, but lack the skills to stop it. We all know people who are tired, drained and depressed, people who latch onto others for their continual support and strength. Not everyone who is occasionally depressed is a psychic vampire. We all get depressed. Vampires are rather rare, and vampirism can grow out of this malady. Remember vampires are not usually consciously attacking you, and once you are aware of the phenomenon, you can stop playing into their games. With your knowledge comes empowerment.

The last kind of psychic attack is the most rare, coming from another practitioner of the magickal arts. These attacks come as curses, wishing bad luck, nightmares and psychic or mental pain. Usually, the person knows you and will have some vendetta against you. My mother’s godmother practiced folk magick in her Italian community and broke curses all the time. Belief and giving into the curse is the worst thing you can do. The more you feel you are cursed, the more the universe responds. No one can curse you unless you let him or her.

Psychic Defenses

All psychic defenses are based in building your own self-esteem, personal power and confidence. Some contain more physical acts, but ultimately it is your will empowering those acts.

 

To purify a space and prevent unwanted, harmful energy from entering, burn purifying herbs. Frankincense and myrrh are a favorite of both witches and the Catholic Church. Native Americans use sage, cedar and sweetgrass. Southern American cultures burn copal. You can also use lavender or cinnamon. These substances naturally clear a space. Salt absorbs harmful energy. Iron grounds the same energy. Horseshoes were pointed down and hung over doors for this purpose. Iron nails are placed in house frames for the same reason. Potions and oils made of these substances are worn for protection.

Magickal symbols of protection can be worn or drawn. Pentacles, crosses, the Star of David and the Eye of Horus are strong protection symbols, and you can usually find jewelry made with these symbols. Wear this jewelry with the intent of protection. A banishing pentagram, a star drawn starting in the lower left corner, dissolves harmful thought forms and removes unwanted spirits. Repeat it as many times as necessary.

During meditation, start by visualizing a shield of clear crystal around your entire body, about three feet away. State “This protection shield protects me from all harm and reflects love back on the source of the harm.” Never send energy back to do harm; it will again return to trouble you. Even if one attacks you first, you are not justified to curse back. By sending love, you neutralize the harm. Wishing good things on your enemies can be the key to defeating them. They will be so happy with what they have that they stop bothering you. Bless your harm away, and more blessings will return to you. Similar protection shield visualizations can be used around your home, car, loved ones and pets.

Sometimes binding spells are necessary. Write the name of the person meaning you harm on a piece of paper. Put it in a bottle, bound with black thread. Fill the bottle with sea salt, protection herbs, iron filings and things like John the Conqueror root. Seal the bottle and ask that this person harm you no longer. As long as you do not open it, the binding will last. You can put the bottle in your freezer or bury it in the backyard.

As a last resort, call upon your guardian spirits. Call on your guardian angel, your spirit guides or the Goddess and God. A student of mine protected himself by asking for help from Mother Earth and drawing Her energy up and directing it to the malevolent spirit. Be creative when protecting.

As you claim your power and grow in your magickal abilities, you will move in harmony with the universe and attract less attention from such darker entities. Others wishing you harm will effortlessly roll off you because you know your place in the cosmic dance of life. Nothing can make you skip a beat of your dance.

Christopher Penczak teaches witchcraft, Tarot and Reiki classes privately in Salem, NH, combining lightwork, chaos magick and multiculturalism into his magickal tradition. He is also the editor of

The Second Road newsletter. For more information, contact him c/o The Second Road, P. O. Box 2252, Salem, NH, 03079, or e-mail torcboy@aol.com.