Author: ladyoftheabyss

A Little Humor for Your Day – “Tide With Bleach”

Tide With Bleach

Dear Tide:

I’m writing to say what an excellent product you have! I’ve used it since the beginning of my married life, when my Mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse.

My unfeeling and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was and generally started becoming a pain in the neck. One thing led to another and I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn’t come out. After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the stains came out so well, that when the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband, it was quite a relief.

I thank you, once again, for having such a great product. Well, gotta go. I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people…

Signed,
A relieved menopausal wife

Source

Turok’s Cabana

Your Daily Planet Tracker for March 21: Venus in Pisces, Now Until Apr 5, 2016

 

 

 

 

PLANET TRACKER

Venus in Pisces

Now Until Apr 5, 2016

 

Venus, the love planet, feels very much at home in sensitive Pisces. These two make a highly refined couple that understands the spiritual side of romance and the more subtle elements of art and style.

Traditional astrologers believe that Venus is exalted in Pisces. This means that the nature of the planet is lifted to a higher level of expression in this sign. The idea of unconditional love is perfectly expressed by this pair. Pisces recognizes no boundaries and includes all that it feels. Loving Venus in this sign is about relationships that are unconditional and spiritual in nature.

When Venus is in Pisces, we all have opportunities to appreciate people without the need to “own” them. There is a spaciousness to relationships that permits higher and higher levels of connection with lesser degrees of control. Love may be experienced in the purest of forms now.

There are some potential pitfalls here, however. A lack of discrimination can mean that romance is foolishly projected onto an unworthy subject. Dreams of perfect partnership can sow illusions that lead to future disappointment. There is also the possibility that one can go too far in adapting to another’s needs to gain approval. Pisces’ tendency to adapt means that we may sacrifice too much of who we really are to avoid conflict or disruption within a relationship.

A heightened sensitivity to criticism or the judgments of others can lead to some painful moments during this period. A way to avoid this is to remember that perfection is not just something to aspire to; it is something that already exists in each of us. Accepting ourselves as fully as we are ready to accept others is a good way to bring Pisces’ spiritual potentials down to Earth at this time.

Venus is associated with the arts in general, and the voice in particular. It’s no surprise that such illustrious female singers as Barbra Streisand, Diana Ross, Billie Holiday and Celine Dion were all born with Venus in Pisces. The artistic expression (Venus) of fantasy (Pisces) is perfect for actresses Patricia Arquette, Drew Barrymore, Geena Davis, Laura Dern, Bridget Fonda, Michelle Pfeiffer and Vanessa Redgrave, as well as actors John Travolta, Sidney Poitier and Michael Caine.

Writers Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Charles Dickens, Vladimir Nabokov, Anais Nin, Edgar Allan Poe, Carl Sandburg and Jules Verne all reflect the rich Venus in Pisces imagination in their work.

The spiritual side of Venus in Pisces is well represented by metaphysician Manley Palmer Hall, mystical musician George Harrison, well-armed guru Elizabeth Clare Prophet, psychedelic meditator Ram Dass, new age writer-actress Shirley MacLaine, author Ken Keyes and social activist Dr. Martin Luther King.

Three famous people with Venus in Pisces have promulgated their own ideas about love. They are Cosmopolitan’s Helen Gurley Brown, Playboy’s Hugh Hefner and the one and only Casanova.

 

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