A Little Humor for Your Busy Day: Plastic Christmas

Plastic Christmas

Snow and sleet won’t bother me With my plastic Christmas tree Spreading season’s tidings to my friends. Christmas is so neat and clean, For it’s polyethylene and Folds compactly when the season ends.

Plastic Christmas! Plastic Christmas! With my blow-up Santa in the yard. Think of Christmas joys and thrills Paid for with twelve monthly bills ‘Cause I used my plastic credit card.

Deck the halls with yards of rayon, And the snow and sleet is spray-on — Just protect it all from open flame. But from all the pretty misses I collect synthetic kisses. Isn’t plastic mistletoe real lame?

Plastic Christmas! Plastic Christmas! Greetings etched in polished Bakelite. Passing drivers stare agape When the hear my mylar tape Shouting Christmas carols in the night.

— Turok, 1968