the daily humorscope 

Sunday, December 04, 2011

 
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
You will casually mention the German term for “exit ramp”, and bring a conversation to a rapid close. That’s hardly your fault, though, is it?
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
No news is not good news, today. In fact, no news is at best mediocre news.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Good day to let sleeping dogs lie. After all, the poor things seem to be completely exhausted, most of the time. My dog, Maggie, is asleep right now (after a good night’s sleep, and a nice morning nap, followed by a good snooze). It’s a tough life, but someone’s got to do it.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
You will meet a tough challenge in a very resourceful way, today, using only a Swiss Army Knife, a transistor radio, and oven cleaner.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Squid day, again. Try to make the most of it. Perhaps you could go around with a bucket of squid, and give one to each of your neighbors? Chances are you don’t know them as well as you should, and this will make sure nobody feels guilty about that in the future.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Excellent time to start a new company, making software to help people with mental problems. You will call it SchizoSoft. Your motto: “Who Do You Want To Be Today?”
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Sadly, nobody will like your latest recipe invention. Perhaps the world isn’t ready for a meatloaf smoothie?
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
Today will be a complete waste of time. You will at least learn to spell “equaminity”…er…”equanimbity”…no…hmmm. You will learn to spell a word like that, today.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
If a wolf is chasing your sleigh, throw him a raisin cookie. That, of course, is a metaphor for what will really happen.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 20)
A person wearing a frilly pink tutu will appear, uninvited, at your next potluck event. He will become quite ornery, when you ask him to leave.
Aquarius (January 21 – February 18)
Today you will begin to have nagging doubts about your feet.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
You are about to start a band, with friends, which will be called “Rainy Daze”. You will choose that name primarily because one of your group simply doesn’t care for “Clenched Buttocks” as a band name.

Wishing You A Fabulous Sunday, my dear friends!

Days Of The Week Comments
Happy Sunday to you! I hope it is sunny wherever you may be. Here it is pouring down rain. You would think someone was on the house with the water hose on high. It is that bad. The road out back to the field, you can’t even see. It is covered with water. Water, water, water, every where and not a drop to drink, lol! I guess I shouldn’t gripe too much, the rain is supposed to turn to snow. YUCK! But winter is here, so what do I expect. I am counting the days to Spring! Have you ever noticed how we are always in a hurry for another season to get here? When it is Winter and 20 below zero, we want Spring to hurry up and get here. Then when it is Summer and it is 120 degrees, we want Winter to hurry up and get here. So does that say as humans, we are never satisfied? Hmmm…… 

 

On to the Magick…….  

 

Sunday Is Ruled By The Sun

  The Sun naturally rules the first day of the week. Any type of God or solar-related magick is especially potent this day. Spells for logic, thought and leadership will have strong results. Other correspondences for Sunday are:  

Ruling Planet: Sun  

Rituals: money, health, friendship related.  

Colour: Yellow  

Element: Fire.  

Number: 6  

 

Spell Of The Day

  

Meeting Spell

  Items You Will Need: 

  • 1 blue candle
  • 1 yellow
  • 1 red
  • 2 black candles
  • 2 white candles
  • Passion Flower or Strawberry Incense
  • Angelite/Celestite
  • Garnet/Moss Agate
  • Emerald/Lapis Lazuli/Malachite

To ensure that all will be well when you meet someone, follow these simple instructions. From left to right, place the candles in this order; white, black, red, yellow, blue, black, white. Light them from left to right. Now light the incense. Place the stones in a circle in front of you, in whatever order feels right to you, and meditate. Visualize the face of the person you’re going to meet, visualize it being happy. Visualize yourself meeting the person and everything going well. As your confidence about meeting the person grows, chant;

”Elen sila lumenn omentilmo.”

Translation: A star shall shine on the hour of our meeting. Let the candles and incense burn out. You may continue chanting for as long as you wish, repeating that line as many times as you feel you need to. Once you are done make sure to carry the stones you used with you when you go to meet that person.

  Magickal Graphics