Posts Tagged With: Parent

The Astrology of Raising Children in the Digital Age

The Astrology of Raising Children in the Digital Age

  Maria DeSimone   Maria DeSimone on the topics of uranus, neptune, blog, astrology, Aquarius

 

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Like many of you parents out there, I happen to be in the uniquely challenging position of raising children who were born in the digital age.

Between 1998 and 2003 both Uranus and Neptune toured through the sign Aquarius together. Anyone born between these years has a certain cosmic DNA that strengthens their ability to use technology, especially the Internet, in an almost intuitive way. This generation will have unique experiences and lessons to learn about expressing their individuality.

 

All glory to the screen

These are the children who are currently at the pre-teen to teenage stage. If you’re anywhere near a school yard these days, I’m sure you’ve witnessed the common scene of an 11 year old clutching his or her iPhone like it’s their candy. You surely must see kids texting and walking in your neighborhood instead of watching where they’re going. These kids are drunk (Neptune) on technology (Aquarius).

Many of these kids prefer to stay inside and play XBOX or Wii rather than ride their bikes or play basketball with friends. These young ones prefer to communicate with their friends via texting (even if they’re in the same room) or video chat.  YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and ooVoo are a normal part of their daily culture. They speak fluent hashtag and text acronym.

Mother knows best

My children, born in 1999 and 2001, are now 13 and 11. I am in the not so enviable stage of raising a teen and a tween … in the digital age. My mother expresses her condolences to me every chance she gets. “It wasn’t like this when I raised you. It’s such a different world today.” My mom has her Sun in Aquarius and she says this to me? Ah, she’s all too familiar with the simultaneous gift and trap that technology offers us.

On the one hand, you may notice that children born during the ‘Uranus and Neptune in Aquarius’ generation have an almost psychic sense about technology and how it works. It’s amazing to watch actually. Who needs the Geek Squad when you’ve got a teenager in the house these days? Yes, these kids are gifted with a deep connection to advanced technology. However, there is also a curse connected to this that any parent will identify with.

The curse is a terrifying reminder of how this generation of children cannot be contained — for better or worse.

Overexposure

Take the 8th grader in my son’s school who posted a naked pic of herself on her Facebook page. No one knows why she did it, but I’m sure you can imagine the aftermath. From what I hear, she’s now suicidal. Last summer, a child at my kid’s camp was caught showing other children Internet porn on his cell phone! Then there’s the kid who got into a fist fight and thought it would be “cool” to have his “toughness” videotaped by a friend watching. The video was quickly passed around, and became evidence to help the victim. That kid doesn’t feel so tough now.

These are real life stories that are happening in the background of my children’s childhood! Don’t be blind … it’s happening in your children’s childhood as well. It’s happening to your child.

What about the never ending YouTube videos posted by tweens and teens across our nation crying for help? This fascinating form of Aquarian self-expression can arouse our compassion and make us aware of humanitarian issues such as bullying and abuse. Unfortunately, it also makes these kids vulnerable in a way they may not quite understand. Once you put something out there on the Internet it’s there … forever. And it might haunt you someday even if, when you’re posting it, you feel like it is completely harmless — or the right thing to do.

The Astrology behind it all

Kids with Uranus and Neptune in Aquarius think it’s “normal” to catalog their life on the Internet. Look, I’m all for transparency. I’ve been known to reveal extremely personal details about my life and experiences on the Internet in order to reach my audience and convey vital astrological messages. But I promise you this, every one of those posts are carefully thought out ahead of time. Each time I make a post, write a blog or post a diary entry to my website, I ask myself if it’s something I’d want my mother or children to read. If there’s an ounce of reservation it’s deleted instantly. I don’t think kids with Uranus and Neptune in Aquarius have that filter. Honestly, I don’t think they care about having that filter.

I find myself sounding more and more like a broken record to my kids, “Guard your electronic health the way you learn to guard your physical health!”

Pedophiles stalk and target tweens on the Internet. Kids text half naked pics to their crush only to have it quickly passed around the entire school or even worse — the Internet. Conversations are recorded without one’s permission and then used to start trouble. Kids are being blackmailed because of technology. Did you know that the vast majority of children are exposed to graphic sexual images on the Internet before they are cognitively ready to process and handle such images?  Are you aware that cyber bullying is almost worse than our obesity epidemic?

My kids aren’t even in high school yet but in many ways I worry that the digital age has robbed them of an innocent childhood. Who am I kidding? It has.

My mother is right. Raising kids in the digital age is a different world entirely. These kids might be techies and computer geniuses, but they are growing up with a unique set of problems that come alone with an endless supply of technology. If you’re a parent of a child born with Uranus and Neptune in Aquarius, remember to pay attention to their digital life as much as you do their physical life.

For them, it’s one in the same.

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Daily OM for January 4th – Allowing Our Children to Be

Allowing Our Children to Be

Practicing Nonattachment

by Madisyn Taylor

One of the hardest things to do as a parent is to allow our children to be who they want to be.

 

Parenting asks us to rise to some of the most difficult challenges this world has to offer, and one of its greatest paradoxes arises around the issue of attachment. On the one hand, successful parenting requires that we love our children, and most of us love in a very attached way. On the other hand, it also requires that we let go of our children at the appropriate times, which means we must practice some level of nonattachment. Many parents find this difficult because we love our children fiercely, more than we will ever love anyone, and this can cause us to overstep our bounds with them as their independence grows. Yet truly loving them requires that we set them free.

Attachment to outcome is perhaps the greatest obstacle on the parenting path, and the one that teaches us the most about the importance of practicing nonattachment. We commonly perceive our children to be extensions of ourselves, imagining that we know what’s best for them, but our children are people in their own right with their own paths to follow in this world. They may be called to move in directions we fear, don’t respect, or don’t understand, yet we must let them go. This letting go happens gradually throughout our lives with our children until we finally honor them as fully grown adults who no longer require our guidance. At this point, it is important that we treat them as peers who may or may not seek our input into their lives. This allows them, and us, to fully realize the greatest gift parents can offer their offspring —independence.

Letting go in any area of life requires a deep trust in the universe, in the overall meaning and purpose of existence. Remembering that there is more to us and our children than meets the eye can help us practice nonattachment, even when we feel overwhelmed by concern and the desire to interfere. We are all souls making our way in the world and making our way, ultimately, back to the same source. This can be our mantra as we let our children go in peace and confidence.

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To think this candle can be snuffed out as quickly as a child’s life is a horrible and terrifying thought.

What has gone wrong with the world? I just read on MSN about the shootings at the Elementary School in Connecticut. Words can not describe how I feel right now. I have children of my own and I truly grieve with the parents that lost children this awful day.

This is suppose to be the most joyous time of the year. But yet we have a gunman go into an Elementary school and kill our children. Can you imagine those poor little children? Oh, Goddess, it is a horrible image. Their little lives cut so short. So much hope and potential for the future passed on this day. There is no reason to ask why nor should anyone look for a reason. For someone to do such an act, they have to be out of their mind. Crazy or not even have a mind at all, a Monster is the only word I can think of to describe this type of person. But the killer should not be remembered. For this is why he did such a horrible act for fame, glory and most of all to be remembered. Instead, we should forget about him and focus on those who need us most right now. The parents, husbands, wives, family and friends who lost their loved ones today.

There pain and grief consumes me. I can feel their emotions so strongly. It is as if I had lost a child of my own. How does anyone ever heal from the lost of a child? Is it possible? Especially at Yule and Christmas. There are their presents waiting to be opened. Mom and Dad watching as they come down the stairs to see what Santa had brought. Their eyes twinkling with delight when they open their presents. All of that taken away from these parents by a lone gunman. Why pick on our innocent children? Because they are so defenseless and trusting. What do we have to do in this country to keep such tragedies from reoccurring?

Tonight the town in Connecticut along with the entire country mourns the lost of these young souls. We have no words of comfort. Nothing will ease their pain, not even time. The loss of a child is simply unbearable. No parent should ever have to burying their own child. I can’t imagine their heartbreak nor what they must be experiencing. Such loss, such emptiness, the lives of the young and innocent cut so, so short.

Goddess, grant these parents peace,

I know if is hard for them to find it at this time.

But grant them Your Love and Comfort at this

their hour of need.

Give them the knowledge their children have

left this old cruel world and gone to a much

brighter and happier place. A place they will

be with their Eternal Mother.

Take away the parents and families heavy

hearts, remind them though their loss be great,

we will all meet again one day.

One day in Your Glorious Love and Light, we

will all reunite. All sorrows shall be forgotten,

all heavy hearts mended.

For that day, tears will be no more,

but sounds of laughter and love will

fill the Summerlands.

Goddess, grant them peace and let

them know they are not alone.

All of our heart are heavy and bear

their sorrow.

So Mote It Be.

More Candles Comments

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Laugh-A-Day for Dec. 7: Obituary – Common Sense

Obituary – Common Sense

This interesting yet sad obituary was sent to Will and Guy by a regular reader of our site. It represents a view often taken by British people when looking at the society that they have helped create. It may also apply in other countries. Let us know.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

  • Knowing when to come in out of the rain
  • Why the early bird gets the worm
  • Life isn’t always fair
  • and maybe it was my fault

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers:

  1. I Know My Rights
  2. I Want It Now
  3. Someone Else Is To Blame
  4. I’m A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

 

Will and Guy’s Humour – Funny Clean Jokes

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You


Witchy Comments & Graphics

You

by the Whyte Bard

You are a child of the goddess, a daughter or a son of the god, and you are here in joy. Live your life to its fullest, taking the good with the bad and learning from each.

Enjoy love, giving yourself to your lover as you will, but not so much that you lose your Self, and take that which is given by your lover, but not so much as to empty them of Selfhood.

You are both individuals who are walking together, side by side, in equal partnership, and if your paths should seperate, then so be it. Seperate in joy, not hate.

Love. Love life, love your fellow humans, and love our Brothers and Sisters in fur, feather and scale. Love your Mother Earth. We are caretakers of this planet; this is our Home.

Work. Do not live from the bounty of others, but live of your own, as an independent member of the whole. If you must take charity, take it in good grace, and return what you have been loaned therefrom when you can, be it in kind, or by whatever means you have.

Give. Give to those in need, and to those that hunger or thirst. Give not to inflate yourself, and to show others your magniminity, but give from a love for your fellow humans. Give of your substance, but more importantly, give a helping hand, that the person helped may support themselves, free from obligation.

Teach. Teach your children and teach others, not by words, for words can twist and lie, but by your own example. Teach kindness, and Understanding, and Joy, but most of all, teach Love. If you must discipline your children, discipline in love, not anger.

Think. Think before you speak. Think before you act. Consider your words and actions, and the effect they will have on others.

Learn. Learn from all, for even a fool may speak wisdom unknowingly. Most of all, learn thru the wide eyes of a child, seeing for the first time.

Ask. If you do not know, ask. If you are unsure, ask. If you are sure …ask again.

Speak the Truth. Live the Truth. Love the Truth. Seek after the Truth.

Harm none. Love all. For it is written, and it is undoubtly so, that what you have done to the least and smallest, you have done to the deity.

~Magickal Graphics~

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Step-Parenting (It’s Not For Wimps!)

Step-Parenting (It’s Not For Wimps!)
image
Author: Rune Fox

Everyone comes about becoming a parent for the first time in different ways. Most have children born to them, while others adopt. No matter what, any woman may have maternal instincts inside her that loves and protects. Perhaps it is the Goddess in all of us.

My children came to me in a most unexpected way. I fell in love. I met Jim at the end of last summer. Having a string of bad relationships, being sexually assaulted, and a bitter broken engagement in the past, I had stayed single for a few years. I gave up all hope of having a life of my own. I met Jim through a blind date. Not expecting much of anything, Jim and I instantly clicked. I know it sounds corny, but I think there was love at first sight. It just so happens that Jim is a divorced father with primary custody.

Now, I’m blessed to have two beautiful children in my life, along with my soulmate, Jim. They are my stepdaughter Ariel, who is 9 and a half, and my stepson Taylor, who is 13.

Having been previously single with no children of my own before, I’d say my new family has adjusted well. I love my stepchildren as if they were my own flesh and blood, and they return their love to me and have accepted me as a parent figure. A person could not ask for more wonderful stepchildren. They really are a dream come true!

The only problem is that Jim’s ex-wife hates me so much, she would speak ill about me around the children. I just don’t understand why she hates me, without even knowing me. She is a so-called “Born -again Christian”. Bear in mind, I have many Christian friends whom I love dearly, so I know full well that hate is NOT a Christian trait. (Or at least it shouldn’t be!)

The biological mother treats the children as if they were her possessions, not as human beings. She has anger management issues, and was court-ordered to seek help. She failed to do so, and does everything she can to make life a living nightmare for everyone involved. There are the unfortunate pawns in her childish games.

It would be nice if someday, Jim’s ex-wife will wake up and realize that she is not doing herself or her children any favors by being hateful. I am really not trying to say that I’m better than her, or that she has no place in their lives at all. That fact remains that she is their birth mother. Nothing will ever change that fact. Removing her from their lives completely would probably do more harm than good to the children, even if it would make life easier for Jim and I.

Jim and I try to be the voice of reason in the children’s lives. Hey, we may not be perfect, but at least we’re stable. Ariel seems to be most bothered by her mother’s hurtful behavior the most. I try to assure her that it doesn’t bother me. After all, I am a U.S. Army veteran, having served in Iraq. There isn’t much that will shake MY tree!

It does hurt me to see Ariel become someone else when she has tantrum-like trances out of frustration. After she comes out of them, she is very apologetic and embarrassed. All I can do is hold her while she cries while she cools down.

Both of the children are in counseling. However, while their mother is in the picture, they don’t seem to be making much progress. I have to remind myself that it is a long, painful process, and all I can do is be patient.

I’d be lying if tell you that I haven’t thought to myself “why am I here? Life was sooooo much simpler on my own! Why not just walk away from it all?

I just can’t walk away, because those kids need me, and I need them. They are what make life worth living! When Ariel looks up at me, smiles, and says “I want to be just like you when I grow up!” and then gives me a huge hug. We go for walks in the woods and build fairy houses.

Taylor is an extremely bright young man who tends to take in frustration rather than act it out. He his smarter than many adults I know. Even so, he is on the way to failing the seventh grade. It breaks my heart when he calls himself stupid.

Even though it is well known that teenagers can be difficult to relate to, Taylor will become bubbly and silly. He will often ask me to play a game of Dungeons and Dragons with him, or ask to go on a hike or go surfing with me. Of course, I think it is just wonderful, because it gets him away from the computer, video games, and television.

I’m sure you’ve heard that saying “It takes a real man to be a father!” The same holds true for motherhood.

I have not yet experienced the joy of being pregnant or the pain of giving birth. I watch women and have been there when some of my friends have enjoyed being pregnant. Even though it sounds terrible, I just couldn’t help but feel envious! Life is itself is such a gift. How wonderful it must be to give life?

Having traveled around the world and seeing the worst that human nature has to offer, I have seen my share of pain, in others and myself. I was once a victim of rape. Needless to say, I had trust issues with men for a long time, as well as people in general. This is probably why I stayed single for quite some time. Now, I’m not looking for pity. Somehow, through professional help and personal strength, I am now a more wary individual. I still believe everything happens for a reason.

Jim and I have decided to try for a child between the both of us. Ariel has already “put in her order for a baby sister.” Now, if that’s not cute, I don’t know what is! We may allow Taylor and Ariel help name the child, once we know when or if we become blessed with another. I will make it very clear form the start that I will always love both them just as much a new baby.

Being a stepmother has prepared me for the next step, if it comes. It has healed my spirit and gave me the strength to take whatever life has to dish out. I am prepared to give my life to my stepchildren, if anyone dares to try hurting them.

There is no love like the love for a child. It is love in its purist form, no matter where it comes from.

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A Little Humor for Oct. 1 – Things my mother taught me…

Things my mother taught me…

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
1.”If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
“Because I said so, that’s why…..”
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
‘If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
‘You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
“Just wait until we get home.”
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
“You are going to get it when you get home!”
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, They are going to freeze that way.”
19. My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
“You’re just like your father.”
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”
25. And my favorite: my mother taught me about JUSTICE.
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!”

Reference:

C. Crisci, Author

Oh My Aging Funny Bone

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Daily OM for September 28 – Aging Parents

Aging Parents

The Cycle of Life

by Madisyn Taylor

When we begin to deal with parents that are aging, it can be a good time to examine your life together and familial past.

For most of us a natural part of the cycle of life is when our roles as children start to shift from that into caretaking roles where are parents are concerned. This can be as major moving a parent into a retirement facility, or coming to the realization that it’s necessary to check in with them more often than usual. Whatever the case, such a shift is momentous as it signals a time of confronting our own mortality as we confront that of our parents. In addition, it can bring up issues about how well they cared for us when we were young. We may also find ourselves consumed with fear at the thought of losing them, even if we’ve been on our own for a very long time.
Talking to other friends and family who are going through similar experiences can be a large source of support. They can help us look at both the unresolved past and the unfolding present, and we are free to talk only about ourselves. Sometimes we need the kind of undivided attention a friend can offer in order to deal with the material that comes up at this time of our lives.
In many ways, this time of life signals a rebirth as we examine our individual past, as well as our familial past. As our parents’ lives move toward completion, we are able to see what they did with their time on earth, what we have done so far with our time, and what we might want to do with the time we have left. These challenges and blessings are all part of the cycle of life.

 

Daily OM

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