Posts Tagged With: Beer

Bath for Clearing Away All Psychic Nastiness: Beer Bath

Posted on January 12, 2013 by ladyoftheabyss

General Instructions for all Baths

 

Once the bath is ready, sit in the tub, and completely immerse yourself seven times, allowing the mixture to flow into all body openings. (Swish it around in your mouth as well, but do not swallow it.) Stay in the tub for seven minutes, then get out, allowing the moisture on your body and hair to dry naturally.

 

The Beer Bath

This is a great little psychic cleanser with added perks: It relieves mild depression and is actually good for your skin and hair.

Materials needed:

1  12 oz. can of beer

1  T. salt

Add the beer and salt to a warm tub of water. Using your index finger, stir the water clockwise until thoroughly mixed.

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Calendar of the Sun for Wednesday, December 26th

Posted on December 26, 2012 by anastasiamarcelle

Calendar of the Sun

26 Yulmonath

Day of Horus

Colors: Red, Gold, and Blue
Elements: Air and Fire
Altar: Upon cloth of red, gold, or blue place a cup of beer, feathers, incense of frankincense, two torches, and a figure of Horus.
Offerings: Look at something from a new perspective.
Daily Meal: Poultry, lentils, flatbread, dates, figs, and beer.

Invocation to Horus

Hail, Hawk of the Sun,
Son of Isis and Osiris,
Avenger of the murdering Set,
You are the sharp glance of objectivity
And the long view of illumination!
We who are earthbound
Sing your praises.
You who see all from afar,
You who swoop on your prey
With unerring aim,
Help us to learn the skill
Of that much focus,
That much concentration
To the blotting out
Of all insignificances.
Hail, Hawk of the Sun!
We who are earthbound
Follow your track across the sky
With every inch of our sight.

Chant: Heru Heru
En ka eny sen

(The beer is poured out as a libation.)

[Pagan Book of Hours]

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Calendar of the Sun for November 29th

Posted on November 29, 2012 by anastasiamarcelle

Calendar of the Sun

 

29 Blutmonath

Sekhmet’s Day

Color: Red
Element: Fire
Altar: Upon a red cloth set two torches, the figure of a lioness, and a clay pitcher of beer mixed with red fruit juice.
Offerings: Meat. Blood. Wrestle with the Beast Within.
Daily Meal: Beer. Meat from a hoofed animal. Barley.

Invocation to Sekhmet

Long, long ago, Ra Lord of the Sun
Was wroth with the people of the earth,
For their disrespect and their carelessness,
And his anger was so great
That he called forth into existence
The lioness goddess Sekhmet
As a manifestation of his wrath,
And he set her upon the people,
Intending her to eat a few of them
And teach them all a lesson.
And Sekhmet leaped upon them,
But she did not stop her destruction,
And after three days she had killed so many
That Ra begged her to stop, regretting his error,
But she refused, saying that there would be no end
To her appetite for blood and death.
So Ra had beer dyed red as blood, and spread it
Over the field of carnage, and she drank,
And fell asleep, and was enspelled.
And so we hail Sekhmet, for within each of us
Is the beast of wrath whom we must propitiate,
And never let run wild, lest it slay
All that we hold dear. Hail Sekhmet!
(All respond: “Hail Sekhmet!” )
Be merciful to us, we who cower
In your shadow, and feel your footprints within us.
(All respond: “Have mercy upon us!”
And may your hunting be plentiful,
And all your days bright with sun.
(All respond: “Hail Queen of the Desert Sun!” Then the red beer is poured as a libation, and the torches are carried outside, where they are left to burn out.)

 

[Pagan Book of Hours]

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Calendar of the Sun for October 27th

Posted on October 27, 2012 by anastasiamarcelle

Calendar of the Sun

27 Winterfyllith

Nekhebet’s Day

Colors: Red, Blue and Gold
Element: Fire
Altar: Upon cloth of red, blue and gold, place two red candles on either side of a figure of Nekhebet, along with a bowl of chopped meat and grain.
Offerings: Beer, barley, millet.
Daily Meal: Beer, barley, millet, lentils, flatbread.

Ancient Lady of Upper Egypt,
Wearer of the White Crown,
Great White Cow of Nekhb,
Wife of the rolling Nile river,
Vulture Goddess whose outstretched wings
Hover over the royal child,
Protecting him from harm, seeing him safe to adulthood,
Help us to know what it is to eat rot
And turn it again into nourishment,
Cleaning and purifying the earth
With the transmuting power of our bodies.
Lady who protects the rulers, the crowned ones,
Protect those of us
Who must take on responsibility
And whose hands work for the lives of many.
Nourish them with your attention
That they may not burn out like a candle.
Guide them with your wisdom
That they may always remember
The nourishment of their people,
Of the body, the mind, the soul.
Protect the sleeping infant child of our hopes
And goals, and future,
And see it safely to fruition.
Spread your wings over us, O Nekhebet,
And may your watch keep us ever safe.

Chant:
Nekhebet Shen
Nekhebet Shen
Nebty Mamissi Shen

[Pagan Book of Hours]

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Calendar of the Sun for October 9

Posted on October 9, 2012 by anastasiamarcelle

Calendar of the Sun

9 Winterfyllith

Day of Tuonela

Color: Black
Element: Earth
Altar: Upon cloth of black lay five black candles, a tankard of beer and a tankard of river-water, and many figures of toads, frogs, and serpents.
Offerings: Fears
Daily Meal: Poultry.

Tuonela Invocation

(One who has been chosen to do the work of the ritual steps forward with the tankard of beer, raises it, and says:)
Hail to the Island of the Dead!
Hail to the Land of Tuonela!
Hail to Lord Tuoni, who waits at the center!
Hail to Lady Tuonetar, who waits at the hearth!
Hail to Surma who guards the borders,
Along the river with its rushing waters
And its black swans, the harbingers of Death!
Hail to Kalma who brings plague,
May she forever pass us by!
Vanamoinen came to your shores
Searching for words of power,
But found all words silent in the Land of Death.
He was served beer laden with frogs and serpents,
Which were only the fears that he brought
Unbidden to the hearth of Tuonela!
Will you drink now of your fears,
And leave them in the Deathlands?

(They carry the tankard about, and folk may drink of their fears, if they feel that now is a good time to face them, or they may refuse. Then another steps forward with the tankard of river-water, lifts it high, and says:)
Will you drink, then, of the River of Death?
If it is not time for fears, will you face loss?
Or, if you are brave, will you take both
And so honor the Gods with your courage?

(They carry the tankard about, and those who have not drunk of the beer must drink of the water, although some may choose to have both. The remaining beer and water are poured out as a libation to Tuonela.)

 

[Pagan Book of Hours]

 

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A Little Humor for Your Work Day – You might be a redneck if…..

Posted on September 18, 2012 by ladyoftheabyss

You might be a redneck if…

There are more than five McDonald’s bags currently on the floorboard of your car.

Momma taught you how to flip a cigarette.

There is a wasp nest in your living room.

The Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.

You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.

There has ever been crime-scene tape on your front door.

You burn your front yard rather than mow it.

You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.

Fewer than half of your cars run.

You’ve ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.

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Calendar of the Sun for Sept. 13

Posted on September 13, 2012 by ladyoftheabyss

Calendar of the Sun
13 Halegmonath

Egyptian All Souls’ Day – Day of Anubis

Colors: Black and tan
Element: Earth
Altar: Set with a cloth of tan like the desert sands, upon which is poured a mound of sand with one black candle set within it, a cup of beer, and a figure of the jackal god Anubis.
Offerings: Candles. Incense. An offer to guide someone in need out of darkness.
Daily Meal: Beer. Figs. Dates. Millet. Barley. Lentils. Duck or goose.

Invocation to Anubis

Lord of the desert sands
Who guides lost souls through endless waste
Into a better land
Who brings the Dead
To their final judgment
Into the hand of Ma’at
Great-eared one who sniffs out
All things hidden
And from whom nothing
Can be concealed forever,
Guide us surely and skillfully
Out of the darkness
Of our own blind searching.

Chant:
Dark God of the West
Take me home
I am a wandering soul

Call and response while pouring the beer libation:

Bring us forth out of darkness
Guide us through the waste lands
Find for us the track of Fate
Like all our ancestors
Like all the souls of the beloved dead
We will find a way
We will find a way
We will find a way
Forth out of the darkness
And into the blazing Sun.

[Pagan Book of Hours]

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Lighten Up – A Redneck Oil Change

Posted on September 1, 2012 by ladyoftheabyss

A redneck oil change

The Redneck Oil Change Checklist
1. Go to O’Reilly auto parts and write a check for $50 dollars for oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and scented tree.
2. Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking it back to O’Reilly to recycle, dump in hole in back yard.
3. Open a beer and drink it.
4. Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5. Find jack stands under kid’s pedal car.
6. In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7. Place drain pan under engine.
8. Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9. Give up and use crescent wrench.
10. Unscrew drain plug.
11. Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil; get hot oil on you in process.
12. Clean up.
13. Have another beer while oil is draining.
14. Look for oil filter wrench.
15. Give up; poke oil filter with screwdriver and twist it off.
16. Beer.
17. Buddy shows up; finish case with him. Finish oil change tomorrow.
18. Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
19. Throw kitty litter on oil spilled during step 18.
20. Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.
21. Walk to 7-11; buy beer.
22. Install new oil filter making sure to apply thin coat of clean oil to gasket first.
23. Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24. Remember drain plug from step 11.
25. Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
26. Hurry to replace drain plug before the whole quart of fresh oil  drains onto floor.
27. Slip with wrench and bang knuckles on frame.
28. Bang head on floor board in reaction.
29. Begin cussing fit.
30. Throw wrench.
31. Cuss and complain.
32. Clean up; apply Band-Aid to knuckle.
33. Beer.
34. Beer.
35. Dump in additional 4 quarts of oil.
36. Beer.
37. Lower car from jack stands
38. Accidentally crush one of the jack stands
39. Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during step 23.
40. Test drive car
41. Get pulled over; arrested for driving under the influence.
42. Car gets impounded.
43. Make bail; get car from impound yard.
Money Spent:
$50 parts
$12 beer
$75 replacement set of jack stands; hey the colors have to match!
$1000 Bail
$200 Impound and towing fee
Total: $1337

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