If Mice Owned Computers…
Why Men Are Just Happier People!
What do you expect from such simple creatures!?
Their last name stays put.
The garage is all theirs.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
They can be President.
They can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell them the truth.
The world is their urinal.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress – $5000; tux rental – $100.
People never stare at their chest when they’re talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood, all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
They know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
They can open all their own jars.
They get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Their underwear is $6.95 for a six pack.
Everything on their face stays its original color.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
They don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
They almost never have strap problems in public.
They are unable to see wrinkles in their clothes.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
They don’t have to shave below their neck.
Their belly usually hides their big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
They can “do” their nails with a pocketknife.
They have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
They can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24, in 45 minutes.
Sorry Guys! LOL!
For those who can relate to today’s ‘Ex Spouse Day’ energies, this tip’s for you. As soon as you start to feel any grieving or negative energies associated with your spouse, just stop what you’re doing (and thinking) and breathe. And be quiet. And be strong. And be the you who belongs to you. And now, I’ll offer just a few more words about conscious breathing. While you’re breathing all that bigness in, don’t forget to also recognize and invite your own big Spirit inside. You can do that simply by breathing in through the nose, all the way down into your belly and then exhaling through your mouth. Then take in another big breath, but this time move the breath into your heart. Breathe into that space and once there loudly exclaim the sound ‘Ha’ on the exhale. This will shake up and shake off negativity stuck to this same ‘ex’ agenda while allowing you to move more easily into the big life that belongs to you! Breathe deeply. Hit the heart hard. Then release and shout ‘Ha!’ This sounds like a perfect exercise to me.
By Ellen Whitehurst for Astrology.com
Your Charm for Today
Guests and visitors will come calling. Their visit brings happiness and joy. This aspect will reflect these emotions for weeks after the visit.
Crescents were worn by the ancients to safeguard them against witchcraft and danger. From the very early Eastern symbol, horseshoes came to be regarded by the Greeks and Romans as charms against sickness and the plague. In the middle ages horseshoes were used as amulets for witchcraft and even today are looked upon as lucky. When the representation of the hand of strength was worn with the crescent it signified hospitality and generosity. Hands of Might are painted on houses in Italy, Syria, Turkey and in the East to protect the buildings from misfortune and the inmates from death. The blue beads were worn to avert the evil eyes.
Your Animal Spirit for Today
April 14, 2014
Cougar has long been associated with leadership. Cougars are powerful, agile, and unhesitating. When Cougar attacks, he throws one hundred percent of himself into the pursuit. Although cougar is strong, he is also elusive —hard to spot in the wild—until he decides to pounce. His lesson to you today is one of being a balanced leader—not rushing into the attack, not always lurking in the brush.
Your Ancient Symbol Card for Today
The Hourglass is a gentle reminder that time passes and with it goes opportunity. Every moment is a moment we cannot retrieve or relive, and there are no guarantees that what we put off today really can be done tomorrow. The Hourglass urges us to make every second of our lives as rich and fulfilling as we possibly can.
As a daily card, The Hourglass suggest you may be allowing opportunities to pass you by. If you’ve been procrastinating or putting too much of your precious time into activities with no lasting value to you, now is the time for you redirect your energies into actions that will enrich your life.