The Sexiest Zodiac Signs

The Sexiest Zodiac Signs

 by Mel, selected from DivineCaroline

 

I’ve always had great luck with Capricorns. Tauruses? Yawn. Geminis? Maybe, if  you like all that talking. Leos? Self-absorbed drama queens. My romantic history  is a constellation of personalities and capabilities and experiences, but  there’s obviously something about my Virgo sensibilities that jibes with the  patience that the average Capricorn bestows upon the act of tossing a  girl’s salad. Or did you think I was talking about something else? We’re not  interested in love matches here, people. This is all about that other kind of  chemistry and which signs of the Zodiac are guaranteed to be a good time  and which might be a great time.

Aries: The Minute  Man

This fire sign is known for being a pretty straight shooter.  Aries will have no compunction at all about sharing his or her raunchiest ideas  about what to do in the sack. The problem with straight shooters, though, is  that they always like to get right to the point. So count on an Aries to take  charge and get you where you want to go—in a hurry.

Taurus: The Romancer

Where Aries is all lusty impulse,  Taurus takes his or her time. Plan on being wined and dined, perhaps to the  point of frustration. And once the Taurus has decided you’re the one for the  job, prepare yourself for plenty of foreplay. If romance is your thing, Taurus  is your sign.

Gemini: The  Talker

The Gemini will bring all his or her intellect to  bear upon getting bare. If you have simpler, quieter tastes, you might be a  little shocked by Gemini’s saucy, seductive monologues. But if phone sex and  dirty talking gets your motor humming, a Gemini is what you’re looking for. But  be prepared to not get a word in edgewise.

Cancer: The Love Maker

Cancers are highly emotional  signs, which means that sex is not merely a mechanical physical undertaking;  rather it is expected to be a poetic act of beauty and love and all that good  stuff. If you’re going to get naked with a Cancer, prepare yourself for an  intense ride. And perhaps some post-coital crying.

Leo: The Narcissist

The passionate and adventurous nature  of the Leo cannot be surpassed. There is no end to the imaginative ways a Leo  will come up with for you to pleasure him or her. Those cats are born sexual  dominants who ooze lusty confidence, and they’re unapologetic about it. While  your romp with the lion will be memorable, for sure, best remember your  satisfaction will be a secondary matter.

Virgo: The  Closet Nympho

You might be surprised to learn that shy,  demurring Virgo would ever be ready to rock without than fistfuls of condoms and  spanking clean bed sheets. The reserved demeanor of the earthy virgins doesn’t  hint at their inner lustiness. Once your Virgo knows and trusts you, watch out.  You won’t get a moment’s peace.

Libra: The  Connoisseur

The Libra is an artiste when it comes to  knocking boots. They seek out a perfect harmony with their partner, luxuriating  in every detail, and they go big on romantic accoutrements such as lingerie,  massage oil, and soft music. You know, so it’s just like a bad porno—perhaps it  even includes a fortuitously timed visit from the pizza guy.

Scorpio: The Leg-Humper

Fiery,  licentious Scorpio is the horn dog of the zodiac. While their sexual prowess and  magnetism can hardly be ignored, getting in bed with a scorpion can have its  sting. While you will probably get the ride of your life, Scorpio’s love ’em and  leave ’em approach to sex could leave less lusty signs cold.

Sagittarius: The Don Juan (or Juanita)

A  master of the art of seduction, a Sagittarius is all about the hunt. They hone  their powers of seduction, pouncing upon their objects of desire only after  rendering them utterly helpless in the face of their sexual  deftness.

Capricorn: The Slow  Boat

Capricorn can come across as a lumbering kind of  lover. Slow to make the first move, patient to the point of impertinence once  the ball does get rolling, Caps may not wow with skill and energy in the sack,  but they will steadily, diligently apply themselves to the all-you-can-eat  buffet of their lover. Be patient with a Capricorn, and you will be well  rewarded.

Aquarius: The Toy Collector
If you’re  someone who is put off by the idea of a velvet box full of scintillating,  slippery, and battery-operated accoutrements under your lover’s bed, it’s best  you steer clear of Aquarius. Always ready to experiment with any number of the  paths to pleasing themselves and their partners, the Aquarian will bring more to  the party than some signs can take.
Pisces: Old  Faithful
Much like Cancer, Pisces will value the emotional  connectivity of sex over the physical one. Passion, love, attention,  patience—these will all come into play with your Pisces lover. But you’ll likely  have to do most of the work. The fish are notoriously lazy lays, preferring to  kick back and bask in the attentions of their beloved. Might want to take a cue  from Aquarius and bring some party favors to keep things  interesting.
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One thought on “The Sexiest Zodiac Signs

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